Vanilla Bikes Is Out To Prove Some People Will Buy Anything And Those People Need Their Taxes Raised

Whatever the opposite of my bag is, this is it.  Jesus.

The Twits Almost Figure Out Speedvagen

Again.  (But not quite, alas.)

First off, that bike is heinous.  Nobody asked me, and everyone should be happy with their bike as much as possible, and some people like the twits need to be taxed more, but jesus frakking chris christie at the pizza buffet, that thing is an (atrociously overpriced) abortion.  Anywho.

Speedvagen in general is a grift to separate twits from their money.  Sacha White did make bikes once, but now he's a marketing/cartoon character who devises insidious ways of making bikes cost two or three or four times what they should.  Custom, proprietary, but ultimately functionally useless, bits and shapes?  Yep?  Outright dumb design choices so the proles know you bought a Speedvagen?  Sure.  Kewl-Kid cult of personality marketing--very expensive, btw?  Check.  Quick n' dirty contract construction?  You betcha.  Insane bespoke times three pricing?  Oh, yeah!  But people want what they want, even if you can get much better, cooler stuff from Rock Lobster or Carl Strong or a dozen other actual bike folks for way less than a Speedvagen poser douchebro special.  The differences between Sacha White/Vanilla/Speedvagen and a, say, Richard Sachs is that Sr. E-Ritchey-sic was a racer and builder and racer and genuine character working his tools before he was an interwebs marketing cartoon character, whereas White kinda went from being some doof taking the framebuilding class to being a marketing guru in just a few short years, skipping all the stuff upon which actual legends are built.  Isn't America wonderful!

Serotta Forum Twits V Speedvagen

There's nothing in the world these idiots can't misunderstand.  Not a SV type girl myself--I'd get a Strong or Rock Lobster ten million times before I'd buy a Speedvagen.  I'd even get a five-years-ago Gaulzetti first.  But the the amazing thing about SV/Vanilla/Sacha White is that he and they managed to create such a stupendous marketing success off of a few finegoodokay bikes/frames built by a bike messenger who took a framebuilding class who just happened to be smart enough to raise his prices by a factor of five or so as soon as he got any recognition at all.  That was genius beyond even what Richard Sachs pulled off, atmo.  All those framebuilder and wannabe framebuilder dudes who give up building or need to keep their day jobs as middle school teachers couldn't do what that Sacha White dude did.  That's what's interesting here.  As usual, the twits supply almost exactly as much trenchant insight and analysis you'd expect from a carp. 

Gaulzetti's Highly Entertaining Marketing Vs The World's Dumbest Bike Forum Vs Ridley Scandium Geometry

There must be something wrong with me, because I find this fucking amusing for some reason.  Gaulzetti's are fine bikes, on par with other handmade American aluminum road bikes, but the genius was in the marketing bullshit, much in the manner of Richard Sachs.  I have no doubt that everyone who buys a Gaulzetti frame knows of Sr. Jerk or even knows Sr. Jerk and wants in on the mofo mojo of the cult of personality, but so what.  Do what you like, and buy what you like, and hopefully ride the shit out of it.  Craig Gaulzetti and Richard Sachs and Sacha White were able to exploit niche marketing in ways others couldn't, wouldn't or didn't.  No matter, Gaulzetti did it well, as did the others.  Good marketing doesn't equal good bikes--and certainly doesn't mean better--but Gaulzetti, like Sachs and White before him, would not have been successful without a solid product from the start.  If I was in the market, I would consider a Gaulzetti.

Or maybe a Ridley Scandium, which was a Gaulzetti before the Jerk was Gaulzetti.