Saturday, December 30, 2017

Vile, Racist, Traitorous Scum Are The GOP Base

Disgusting, disloyal, hateful mental defectives have always been the heart and soul of the conservative movement.  America's worst mistake was not making the racist Confederate traitors extinct when they had the chance in 1865. 

Thursday, December 28, 2017

Fuck Off Roy Moore, Eat A Bag Of Dog Dicks

You are a horrible shitstain, and you should fuck right the fuck off and die.  Take your racist cunt whore wife and your vile supporters and leave the rest of the species alone. 

Tuesday, December 26, 2017

Orrin Hatch Is The Most Pathetic Motherfucker On Earth

The poor senile old bastard is even more pathetic than Trump's wives.  Hatch has been a sanctimonious prick and bathetic dimwit for decades, but now that sick fuck is ready the gods-damned motherfucking farm up state.  Not that anybody from Utah would be any good, but fucking Orrin Hatch is a fucking bigger cuck loser than even Mike Pence.

Friday, December 22, 2017

Orrin 'Lemon Party' Hatch Is The Saddest Cuck In The GOP

Holy sweet fucking jesus christ, Orrin Hatch is the most pathetic, piss-swilling Gimp in Washington.  Hatch was sucking Trump's scabrous micro-penis for all he was worth while the media gawked in horror.  That's probably the best entertainment we're likely to see in the rest of the year.  Thanks, Trump.

Wednesday, December 20, 2017

Tell Jools Holland To Suck It


I Guess It's Time For Cornel West To Come Right Out And Say That Ta-Nehisi Coates Is An Airheaded Chump

A vacuous stooge.  Maybe that way the black gossip kids--and the rest of the gossip kids--will finally be able to understand what Brother West is saying.  Coates is a lightweight, feted by the village idiot establishment because he's such an enthusiastic striver and such a loyal neoliberal pissboy, and Cornel West is not happy to put up with that shit any longer.  Brother West is not one to be such a bastard about it though, so the dimwits are not completely sure what the fuck he's saying.  Time to speak slowly Brother West, in short sentences using small words, so that the idiots can understand. 

Andrea Mackris Is Back: Merry Fucking Christmas Bill O'Reilly, You Giant Cocksucker

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Adventures With Twits, Or How Do These Morons Wipe Their Own Asses

Every day is their first day. Jesus.  All the money in the world to spend and not a brain cell between 'em.  That's the exceptional American upper classes for you. 

Monday, December 18, 2017

Holyday Song

When Joe Manchin Makes More Sense Than Anyone In Your Party

It's time for some brutal self-reflection.  Joe's Man Chin is generally a fucking worthless douchenozzle, but he has this Franken shit figgered bettered than many Dems.  It would be great fun to see Gillibrand called out for her risible posturing and clumsy maneuvering in the run-up to the next presidential election, too.

UFOs R Real!!!


Harry Reid, Starring As Ed Straker, Sings 'Books About UFOs'

Harry Reid, commander of SHADO.  Only a fool thinks they shut down the program.  They found the proof.  Now they're working day and night to stop the alien threat.  Join Harry Reid as Ed Straker, Joe Biden as Alec Freeman, and Barack Obama as Paul Foster and watch as they resist the alien menace!  UFO!

Conservative Christians Are Too Stupid For College

This idiot parent doesn't seem to know that her little christian is already a huge, herpes-ridden slut or a gleeful gay blowjob queen, and that the whole family should be banned for all colleges due to tedious, banal stupidity.  Jesus fucking christ, christians are fucking scum.

Steelers Versus Patsies Is Yet More Proof Of The Fundamental Evil Of The Universe

The rule is not the problem--it's easy to understand, runner vs receiver--whether you like it or not, but the simple fact that the Steelers playing the Patriots did not end with a rip in the fabric of the universe imploding the entire contest long before that dumb play proves the universe is pure evil.

Saturday, December 16, 2017

Political Song for the GOP to Sing


Pretty New Neville Cork Content

That's not something anyone expected in 2017.  Apparently he's still got his frame building gear and might want to show you how it's done...

Trump Needs Steven Seagal In The White House Right Fucking Now

Secretary of State. Chief of Staff. National Security chief!  Something!  Trump needs Seagal ASAP.  This guy's vital!

Teabagging Trumptards Are The Dumbest Motherfuckers Ever

These dipshits believe every lie they are told, but they can't figure out anything true for themselves.  Every teabagger is a helpless stooge, being violated every day by the idiots who run the GOP.  These bastards deserve their fate, but at some point we have to stop allowing them to be the foot soldiers of America's decline.  Anyone stupid enough to think that somehow tens of thousands of people voted illegally in an election is beyond any form of help.  The screaming lunatics at InfoWars are only the most risible of America's exceptional assholes.

Thursday, December 14, 2017

Beautiful GOP Stalwart And Exceptional American Patriot Dan Johnson Was Sick To Death Of All The Winning

Enjoy hell you sick fucking bastard!  I'm sure this scumbag Johnson will be keeping a seat warm and the razor-sharp demon cocks hard for Roy Moore and Jerry Sandusky and a whole bunch of other world-famous Republican creeps in full view of Satan's throne.  Thanks, Trump!

Wednesday, December 13, 2017

Walls


Oh, No, RIP Pat DiNizio

Pretty sudden, though he had been sick the band was planning another tour.  That sucks.

Girls Girls Girls


Have The National Dems Learned The Lesson Of Alabama?

No, probably not.  The Dems are not going to do everything to build a vibrant constituency and bring out huge numbers of African Americans and other minorities, working class non-minority voters, aka cracker assholes, women, younguns at every fucking election.  Nope, the Dems will probably continue chugging along as the lame little brother of the GOP and continue to lose most of the races they should be winning--or would be winning if they represented a clear alternative to rock-ribbed conservative neoliberal bullshit.

Chris Froome Registers The Least Surprising 'No Shit' Failed Drug Test In Recent History

No. Shit.  Froome and Team Sky are the Lance Armstrong/USPS for this decade.  What a bunch of wankers.

Tuesday, December 12, 2017

It's Official: Trump Is Sick In The Head From Not Winning

No winning for Trump.  He's sick.  Sick in the head.  Everything Trump touches turns to shit.  Everyone Trump backs is a loser.  A good day for the country and the world.  MMAAAGGGGAAAAA!

Steve Bannon Must Be Sick Of Winning

Bannon sure looks like a loser this year.  Is he sick?  Sick of too much winning?  Does Bannon even know what winning really is? 

Charles Barkley Is Not Sick Of The Winning

Big Alabama guy on CNN right now from the Jones HQ.  Is he drunk?  Or just happy?  Or is the answer Alabama.  But Barkley is calling for the Dems to be better for the black folks and the poor folks in Alabama and beyond.  Nice.  Thanks, Mr. Barkley.

Roy Moore Is Sick To Death Of All The Winning!

Where's the winning for Moore?  Where's the winning for Trump?  First, Trump's man loses in the primary and then Trump's next man loses in the general!  MMAAAGGGGAAAAA!

InfoWars Is Losing Their Shit As The Race Was Called For Jones

A couple of the A-ball dipshits are blubbering their way through the call right now.  Pretty fucking hilarious.  Thanks, Trump!

Laura Ingraham's Low-Rent Facelift Is Full-On Uncanny Valley Tonight

The stress of Moore's risible loss is making her strip-mall plastic surgery look especially bad tonight.  Holy christ, she was homely woman before but now she looks like a Chinese knock-off dollar-store sex doll.  Jesus.

The NYT Election Widget Is Pretty Fun

A good design. Fun to watch as the results come in.  Watching the Roy Moore stuff coming in is even better!  Fox "News" is lots of fun tonight as well.

What's Worse For The GOP? Win Or Lose?

Short-term a loss means Trump has to eat a Roy Moore shit sandwich in public till christmas.  Fun!  But long-term, watching those Republican cocksuckers in the Senate try and deal with Moore will be a beautiful expression of American exceptionalism. 

Roy Moore's Jewwy Jew Lawyer Will Never Be Sick Of All The Winning

And by winning, we mean money, right Shylock.  This is such a wonderful expression of beautiful conservative Republican racist values that I think I need a cigarette. 


Jesus Frakking Christ, Arne Carlson Shows More Brains Than Any 30 Dem Senators

Of course, Carlson is not Kirsten Gillibrand angling to get rid of Franken in order to raise her own profile and eliminate rivals in the run-up to the next presidential election, either.  But good on Carlson for seeing the ratfucking and calling out the cowardice and stupidity on the Dems' side.  Jeez, a GOP guy who might not be a complete fucktard.  How might that happen?

V Little



Saturday, December 9, 2017

Collect Calling


$5 Million Is Not Nearly Enough Cash To Fuck That Creepy Harelip Motherfucker Trent Franks

Franks is a vile fucking teabagging shithead, so no wonder he tried to bribe chicks with $5 million to fuck him.  Not even Bill O'Reilly's most strung-out ladyboys would take that deal.

Of Course The Trump Pee Tape Is Real

And for sure it's actually Bill O'Reilly's favorite Indochinese ladyboys brought to Moscow to piss on Trump while Putin watches.  That will be the unanimous choice for best picture this year and every year for the next decade!  Thanks, Trump.

Suddenly Boston College Does Something Good

Nobody likes Duke.  So, for today at least, Boston College is not complete shit.  Thanks, Trump!

Political Song for Dems to Sing to Kirsten Gillibrand

How's That Post-Franken Unceasing Call By The Dems For Trump's Resignation Going

Not so much? Shocking!  Who knew that Gillibrand and her braying herd of assclowns would forget all about this shit now.  This kinda shock can kill a girl...

Thursday, December 7, 2017

Black In Back


One State Solution In Palestine

Now's the time.  Undo apartheid Israel from the inside.  One secular state.  Civil rights and voting rights for all.  Freedom of religion.  Capitol in Jerusalem.  A perfect end to the struggle for Palestinian freedom.  Thanks, Trump!

The Dems Had One Mission: Deny Roger Stone Franken's Scalp

They failed.  Gillibrand and her herd of braying buffoons played exactly the way ratfucker Roger Stone knew they would.  Franken has been a target since 2008, and the Dems were stupid enough to fall for the trick.  Always ask why Gillibrand and the rest of those dumb broads were so upset about this but not nearly so upset about Merrick Garland or healthcare or the fight for $15 or any of the other shit that non-conservatives care about.  They pick their battles carefully.  Very.  Carefully.

Franken And The Dems Go Down Like Bitches

Now let's watch the Dems lose a Senate seat when both Minnesota Dems are on the ballot next year.  Fucking genius!  It's the slimy neoliberal careerist shitbirds like Senator Gillibrand and her band of merry airheads that might have cost themselves a majority.  Somehow, I don't think that matters all that much to them, though.  It's long past time for anyone with even half a brain to abandon the Dems once and for all.

Wednesday, December 6, 2017

Relined


What If The Next Victim Of The Democrats' Stupidity Is Someone Really Fucking Great?

Those morons with their coordinated attack on Franken--not on Trump, not on Moore, not on the tax cuts, not on McConnell, but on one of their own--what if those idiots destroy someone really excellent next time?  Gillibrand and the rest of those braying morons should never be trusted.  They destroyed Franken, but what if it is an actual decent or even a really great Dem next time?  A leader, a real, left-wing Democratic Party superstar being ratfucked by a creepy pervert like Roger Stone for no reason, what then?  Dems lose because they are losers.  It's not a mistake that they lost 1000 officeholders under Obama.  It was not a mistake that the Dems gave up a seat on the SCOTUS.  It's not a mistake that nobody destroyed ratfucking sex pervert Roger Stone 40 years ago.  Dems lose because they are losers.  If Dems were winners they'd be defending Franken, attacking Trump, opposing the tax cuts, fighting for single payer, fighting for a $15 minimum wage, attacking Moore and Farenthold and the rest of the GOP scum.  But they don't.  And they never do.  That's not a mistake.  Not an oversight.

Democrats Will Forever Be An Unending Disappointment

Vacuous self-righteous fools, mugging for a camera, too stupid to know they're being played.  This is why Dems lose.  It's also why Dems have shitty positions and can't bring themselves to stand up to the rest of the right-wingers.  Franken is merely a test case for Roger Stone's ratfucking--and it didn't start this fall as they've been targeting him since 2008--and the Dems led by those dumb broads are failing in the most embarrassing fashion.  Now the Dems are counting on Dayton to make the absolute right pick to replace Franken because Dayton fucks up the choice he might give the GOP a chance to pick up that seat in 2020.  Dayton's never been known as a genius or anything, so those airhead Dems have better have thought this all the way through.  Two things we know: Dems are weak and stupid and Dayton will put a shitty right-wing establishment Dem in the seat.

Tuesday, December 5, 2017

Sensed Less


Get The Fuck Out John Conyers

88 is too fucking old to hold that much power in Congress.  Regardless what Conyers did or didn't to with his pecker to his staff, he was decades past his sell-by date and should have been out a long fucking time ago.  Pelosi, too.  Buh-bye.  Feinstein.  Rangel.  Get the fuck out.  These Dems are all to fucking old and should be retired.  No wonder the Dems are so retarded.

Air-Headed War Groupie K.T. McFarland Is In Trouble

McFarland has probably sucked her last dick in service to America.  I guess it's hard to see it now, but maybe she was hired for looks or special skills 40 years ago.  Sure as shit she was never hired for her brains.  Even by Republicans.  This is another risible example of Trump picking the absolute biggest conservative morons for every possible role.  Brilliant!  Thanks, Trump.

Back to Fox "News" for her, where she can help Hannity brush up on his technique.  

Robert Mueller Seems To Be Enjoying Himself

Mueller's case will ultimately rest on the contents of tax documents and bank records, so nobody needs to wear a wire, but Mueller is certainly fucking with those nimrods on purpose.  The administration is wobbly to begin with, and this joyous abuse is simply Mueller's way of torturing them.  Rock on, Bobby Mule-er. 

Thanks, Trump!

Vanessa A. Bee With An Interesting Call For Non-Elite Boarding Schools

Exeter for everyone? Umm, no.  But the idea and ideal of more care for everyone and not less is a valuable one.  Kind of like the Norwegian model where the local community schools are comprehensive starting early, where the kids learn skills and self-reliance and shit like that without having to be locked in miasmic kinderprisons out of fear or lack of funds.  Current Affairs again.

Monday, December 4, 2017

Comprehensive, Elegant, And Brutal Ben Shapiro Fisking

That disgusting creep the Virgin Ben gets shredded by Nathan J. Robinson, and every good man and kind woman out there has a special feeling in the underpants now.  Shapiro is sad and foolish little man, and the more ridicule we can heap on his misshapen head, the better off everyone will be.

Paul Manafort Apparently Not Yet Sick Of All The Winning

There's some winning left for him, I guess!  Manafort's clearly a sooper-genius if he fucked up his deal so comically.  One thing you can be of with Trump is that every single person working with him is the biggest idiot Trump could find.

Sunday, December 3, 2017

Phoney Tree


The Story Of X, So Far

Somewhat remarkable X is still out there as a functioning entity.  40 years is a long freekin' time, and they were never a huge draw or anything.  John Doe is probably really happy he's friends with Exene instead of still married to her...

Trump V Dead Intern Scarborough? Fuck, Yeah!

These two loathsome shitbirds should take this fight to the death.  Trump and Scarborough are most disgusting right-wing assholes on the planet, so if they can take each other out, well, that would be the best thing that has happened to America in a hundred fucking years.

Aaron Boone Is Sure As Shit A Huge Middle Finger To Girardi

Why Boone? Simply because he's not Joe Girardi?  Well, oh kay, then.  I think that the Aaron Boone the Yankees hired has promised to be the company man the company wants, whatever that is.  And he's not Joe Girardi.