Bandwagon Fanclub

Now Everybody Likes 'The Orville'

Bandwagonesque, anyone? (The idea, not the album.)  It's not just the gossip kids, but all the ass clowns who were shitting on the show way harder than they shit on most trash are now on board or at least on the platform.  It's popular.  We like cool things, too.  We know what's good.  Look at us having the same opinions like everybody else.  Keep in mind these are some of the same folks who think they're sharp enough to discuss other, sometimes somewhat important shit, too.  Thanks, Trump.

Joe Barton Is 100% Sick Of All The Winning

Yeah, bye, k.  Who could possibly be sick of winning with Joe Barton?  Maybe the poor fat fucker realized he didn't have too many good years left of yanking his nasty little pud on the internets, so it was now or never to chase that dream.  Thanks, Trump!

The Rest Of The World Gets In On The Ben Domenech-McCain And The Federalist Fisking

Welcome aboard.  Ben Domenech-McCain will always shit out the dumbest plagiarized bullshit, even when he doesn't write it himself.

X Back

Jane Sanders Obliterates Joy Reid

Oh yeah.  Vicious.  Reid deserves no less.

Not Ewe Too

Terrible Things About U2, And Thanks The Gods Nobody Cares

Nobody gives a shit about U2's new record, but the 90s were a terrible time for U2.  The music was laughably bad, and anyone who doesn't understand that is a fucking vile moron.

Comprehensive Yet Joyless Fisking Of The Proud Boys, America's Most Explicit Expression Of Closet Cases Since The GOP

Sure, it's fine to catalog their fascist, violent, misogynist, and racist tendencies and actions, but when you get into the fabulous weeds with the proud boys, you simply must revel in ridicule and point and laugh at their pathetic homosexual subtext.  These semi-pro nancyboys are not just the guys not cool enough to make the team or get a bid to the top fraternity, but they're the guys who didn't get into state u in the first place.  Most decent folks would say it doesn't matter if these losers are timid closeted homos, since that's their own business, but not those proud boys.  They pride themselves as virile and desired, but their whole existence screams help me, love me for my very gay self louder than the Village People, Rob Halford, or even Alex Jones.

1 Line, No Waiting

Figuring Out Arcade Fire Is Not That Hard

There's nothing complex, nothing deep about the band.  They're good.  Very good at their peak, and now they'll never be that good again.  Never brilliant.  Never the Mekons.  Far too easy to overthink Arcade Fire, but the answer is pretty simple.  I said years ago that The Suburbs was like Jonathan Franzen's The Corrections, good, very good at times, clever in spots, entertaining, but short of brilliant, while also clearly the creative peak of the artist.  Arcade Fire, like Franzen, is easy to figure out.

James O'Keefe Is Now Officially Sick Of All The Winning

O'Keefe is fucking sick! What happened to all the winning?  He probably thought he'd never get sick of all the winning, but something happened.  What was that??

Thanks, Trump.

Word Up

Trump Is No Worse Than Every Other Racist GOP Shitbag

Of course he made an embarrassing racist remark in front of drunken redskins who were playing powwow for firewater.  Why wouldn't he?  It's the GOP way!  Those fucks love that shit!  And every one of 'em got to take home a free blanket, too.

Kevin Sorbo Is A Special Kind Of Stupid

It's nice that he can usually put on his big boy pants by himself now and go outside to play, but that poor dumb bastard should not be left alone ever.  Sorbo is one of those nitwits who can't understand that Hillary Fucking Clinton is not actually elected to anything right now, so she matters almost less than Kevin Sorbo.

Joy Reid May Be A Village Idiot, But Erick Erikson's Fat Face Is Not Up To Fisking Her

I'm sure Erick son of Erick has trouble picking his nose without adult supervision.  Reid's no-show job in the establishment is safe as long as dimwits like Erickson are the only ones sniping at her.

Political Song for Chuck Timlin, Chip Lowery, Adam Hardej, and the Rest to Sing

Trump's Incompetence Is Breaking Every Facet Of American Government

And it's hilarious.  Trump's not simply a tiny-fingered vulgarian, not simply a childish imbecile, no, he's so much more.  Trump is tediously stupid, hopelessly incompetent, and the GOP establishment is helpless before him.  These are the greatest days for entertainment in human history.  And he's not just destroying America, he's unraveling the entire western world.  Thanks, Trump!

Ginnin' It

Trump Will Lie About The Piss Tape, Too

He's trying to lie about the pussy tape now, after admitting it already because senile, and no doubt Trump will lie about the piss tape when it comes out, denying that those Indochinese ladyboy hookers pissing on him were the ones he met through Bill O'Reilly.