Markos Daily Kos Also Failed At Reaching As High As Corn Cob Status

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Well, It Turns Out KC Smushed SF In The Super Big Game Bowl

Damn.  That was good.  It looked like the Forty Fuckin' Niners had that thing won, but in the end KC embarrassed them for fun and profit.  Two interceptions that looked like they cost your team the game, but, nope, you are the MVP.  Nice job, Mr. Mahomes.  Kinda hard to ever want a Shanahan to win.  What the fuck is the matter with Kansas?  For one day, nothin'.  Right, Trump?

FREE KITTEN

Bernie Wins With Free Kittens

And free sex. That's something conservatives don't get, but everything else works for everyone, even conservatives.  So I guess Bernie's gonna win.  Everybody get in the van!  Thanks, Trump!

Please Run, John Kerry--We All Need Some Laughter In Our Lives

Comedy is hard, but funfetti is delicious.  If John Kerry ever gets into this because Biden spends the night of the Iowa Caucus sitting on a beanbag chair eating pudding without his dentures in on live tee vee, well, Bernie should considering becoming a man of all the gods.  Jesus frakking christmas, John Kerry lost once, but this time it'll be even more hilarious.  He couldn't beat George W. "Retardboy" Bush, but he'll take out Bernie AND Trump!  Pleez, Jebus.

Me To

Dave Rubin, Like Every Conservative, Is Dumber Than Dog Shit

Debate Sam, asshole.  Holy fucknuts, Dave Rubin is a fucking zero.  Conservatives are dumber than dog shit.

And Thus, Slowly And Calmly, The Establishment Bends The Knee To Bernie

Surely a few of the worst will suffer under Bernie, the Hildos, the Clintons themselves, the Bush and Trump families, other fascists, racists, villains, bullies, conservatives, but for most, it will be the best of times.  Even much of the establishment will grow to appreciate the Bernie era, and who would not like to see Bill and Hillary Clinton, George Bush, Donald Trump and all their scumbag followers flushed into the cesspool of history.  It's coming.  And it will be wonderful.

Anti-Power Pop

Rashida Tlaib Would Make A Great VP

Booing Hillary Clinton is the best thing any human could ever do.  Hillary is fucking human garbage.  The best advice in the world: never apologize to a Clinton.  The Clintons are pure evil, racist right-wing evil.

Rachel Bitecofer Is A Dipshit

She fucking loves the smell of her own farts.  Anyone dumb enough to think Rashida Tlaib booing Hillary Fucking Clinton is a debacle, well, they're perfect for the vile Hildos, those arch-conservative racist neolibs who love Hillary Clinton, promoting a bathetic conservative establishment worldview and delivering a laughingly simplistic analysis bordering on parody.  The worst thing Rashida Tlaib did was walk it back instead of leaning in with a hearty "Fuck Yeah!".  But Rachel Bitecofer will be farting up a storm and be sniffing away regardless.  And don't call yourself the doc unless you have an actual medical degree, asshole.  Nobody gives a shit about a Ph.D from some shitty southern state school.  Jesus.

There Are No Happy Endings

Peter Hamby Gets It On Bernie, Atmo, And The Neolib Dems Are Wicked Pissed

Of course Bernie is the strongest against Trump, for the reasons Hamby cites and more--and after Pelosi's and Schumer's political malpractice, Bernie is the only Dem candidate who will beat Trump.  Every other Dem would lose to Trump now after the horrible performance of the Dems in Congress since 2018.  The right-wing racist KHive Hildo donut-twitter neolib assholes might not like it, but Bernie will win the primary and will beat Trump, even when Hillary and her smattering of hateful losers vote for Trump.  Bernie would have won in 2016, and Bernie wins in 2020.  Hamby is correct, but he's not the only one who knows it.  Trump and Hillary know it, too.  You really do love to see conservative racists lose their shit.

Hillary Clinton Is Trash, But She Increases Bernie's Winning Margin Every Time She Opens Her Ugly Trap

So, thanks, bitch.  Hillary and Bubba are every bit as gross as the Bush Family, Reagan, Nixon, and all the inbred Trumps. But she's so fucking senile at this point that she can't see how she's turning Bernie victories into Bernie blowouts.  Sad.  Thanks, Trump!

Life Inside The KHive With The Hildos

Stillwithering Hildos Are America's Least Popular Pet In 2020

These neolibs are just fucking awful.  They believe all the craziest shit as long as it serves the arch-conservative racist Dem status quo.  Sad.  Thanks, Hillary!

Update: This is lunacy; these donut-twitter neolib racists are unhinged.

Updater: Bugfuck crazy screaming insanity.  The Klob wouldn't even win Minnesota against Trump.  Kamala Harris is a fucking cop.  Jesus. 

No Kisses Left 4 U

Even Libertarian Boys Cosplaying Ignatius Reilly Feel The Bern

Bernin'.  Whoever laid out the Sanders campaign is a fucking genius.  I love it when a plan comes together.  Biden somehow still in the race is a worst-case scenario for Bernie, but he is still winning every early state and now nationally in the week before the voting starts.  Once that voting begins, Sanders is positioned to roll this up by March.  That is fucking brilliant.  Everything is working.  You really do love to see it.  Look for Tulsi to drop out after Iowa, possibly Yang as well.  If Warren lasts until New Hampshire, she will drop out after NH--she should endorse Bernie, but her campaign has been such a shit show, I would not be surprised if she fucked that up too.  Klobuchar and Booty-gig have always been unimportant, and they're about to see that hilarious reality; they won't change anything, and their supporters will hop on the winning side with Bernie.   Steyer and Bloomberg don't matter either; let them spend their money against Trump.  The only wild card might be if Biden has a sundown moment and quits on tee vee after he loses South Carolina.  Fun times.  Thanks, Trump!

John Delaney, Really Fuckin' Sick Of So Much Winning

Loser!  Say goodbye to a true shithead.  John Delaney is another neolib sick to death of all the winning. 

'Si'