The REAL Hastert Rule

Something priests and other serial predators would recognize: exploiting the helpless children, and then lying about it.  It's not enough to be a fucking scumbag child molester, but then you cover it up and lie to the fucking world so you never have to face punishment for your crime.  Hastert is a vile hypocrite, and an almost perfect Republican.

The Dems in the House should never stop using the phrase "Hastert Rule" for even one second during this campaign.  Hastert, Gingrich, Paul Ryan, and all the rest of those shitheads should be hung around the neck of every single Republican in the House so that the Dems can regain the majority.

Come on Dems, let's hop on this taking back the House thing the way Hastert hopped on those boys!

Jesus, Even The Chris Matthews Show Realizes Kasich Is Running For Veep

And Chris Matthews is a fucking dullard.  When a dipwad like Matthews sees what Kasich is up to, well, then you know it's clear as fucking crystal to every numbskull and dickbrain out there.  Finally.

But Kasich has been doing this from the start, or at least from the time that it became obvious what Trump was doing.  Kasick knew that everyone needs a kid sidekick, and he set out to be Trump's.  Good play, really, because it's Trump or no one in the GOP; at least Kasich can say he grokked that shit way before boatloads of assholes, including Chris Matthews.

James Connolly

So, Have You Noticed That The Democratic Primary Was Decided Four Years Ago

No matter what, the Democratic Party decided Hillary Clinton would not lose.  Sanders is an anomaly, but he's not getting elected to anything in 2016.  Why is that?  Why are Iowa and New Hampshire the first contests, states which are small, conservative, reactionary, and white?  Why aren't New York and California the first primaries?  Why aren't all the states primaries?  Held on the same day so everyone's vote counts?  Why does the Democratic Party have superdelegates who can decide the nomination regardless of the voters?

These are not questions Americans are supposed to ask.  Americans are not supposed to understand that no matter what, Hillary Clinton will be the Democratic nominee and the next president.  There's no democracy when your vote doesn't count.  And your vote doesn't count.

There's No Frakking Way Merle Haggard Was Kidding With The Reactionary Shit

He saw the market, and he pandered to it--cuz he likes money.  Country music became the voice for the shitheel racist cracker even more when the world was dissolving around those assholes in the 60s and 70s.  Haggard knew how to write a song, and he knew how to speak to those morons.  So he did.  That's the truth.  He may have claimed it was satire later on, but that's bullshit.  He should have owned up to pandering to those idiots because they were his audience.  He knew what he was doing with those dumb songs.  He was  a country music icon, so he had no reason to pretend otherwise.  Racist assholes listening to country music is as old as America.  Merle Haggard certainly understood that as well as any exceptional American ever has.  With this, the scandal is the coverup.  Haggard was better than his most offensive songs, and he should have copped to that shit, too. 

Andrew Sullivan Is Still A Racist Moron

Why would anybody listen to that squawking conservative queen from England?  He's a buffoon and dim-witted scold.  Remember healthcare under Clinton?  Remember how Andrew Sullivan enabled and supported the outright lies of Betsy McCaughey and her oligarch masters?  That was the true Andrew Sullivan, and now he's been rehabilitated back into the media establishment.  What a disgusting time for any sane, decent American to be alive when we have to be subjected to the inane rantings of a slimeball like Andrew Fucking Sullivan.  He should be hosting a circle-jerk with Stephen Moore and his ilk instead of polluting our tee vee with his racist fucktardery.

Stephen Moore: Exceptional American Asshole

If the Coors and Mellon and duPont and Olin families had not invented the modern wingnut welfare state, fatuous nimrods like Stephen Moore would be living in a gutter somewhere, begging for change on the street, and eating worms out of puddles in your driveway.  He's had a good run of it, licking boots and spouting bullshit, but Trump has destroyed their system now, and losers like Moore are gonna be feeling those hunger pangs pretty fucking soon.  Until now, Moore has been able to earn himself a tasty paycheck being wrong about every single fucking thing while lovingly laving the balls of the conservative establishment with his soft, practiced tongue.  But Trump won't need that, for he'll bring his own lickspittles and ass-kissers, and clowns like Moore will no longer serve any useful function.

If You Ever Wondered Where The Halfway Decent Florida Person Was

They found her.  Hopping all over Rick Scott in public where he couldn't really fight back was pretty fucking cool.  If Florida had a few thousand more like her, it wouldn't be such a fucking toilet.

And, Now Trump Is Turning His Fire On Fox "News"

I would imagine this is not the last we'll hear of this in the run-up to the coronation in NY.  Now is the time for Trump to run up the score against Fox "News" right in their hometown--and his.  This shit is not the funnest of the fun, but it's more than ok to watch these fucking scumbags throw rancid shit at each other.

Never Trump Died Last Night

That sad, misshapen mutant was stillborn the second its brain-damaged mother shit it out onto the sidewalk in Madison.  The entire GOP establishment in Washington, the idiot governor and his band of merry asswhipes in the local media, and probably hundreds of millions of dollars could only get the repellent Ted Cruz 48% in the reactionary fucktard shithole of Wisconsin.  Now what?  They have nowhere left to go, because there's no candidate running against Trump in any states left.  NY?  A yuge state, all Trump.  Those other asshole states the following week?  Cruz and Kasich are exaclty nowhere.  California?  Cruz ain't happening, so it turns out that the Republican establishment has been deluding themselves since the night of the NH primary.  Screaming, hilarious incompetence from the GOP?  Who woulda believed that?

Last night in Wisconsin shows the reason Trump has kept Kasich in the race, though.  Kid-sidekick and comic-relief is the perfect role for that skeevy cocksucker Kasich.

Ted Cruz's Jew York Values

Well, the campaign funfetti has been achingly weak for the most part since Trump completed his extermination of what was for 150 years known as the Republican Party, but at least we will have a couple of weeks of watching mush-mouthed dullard and animated death-mask Ted Cruz try to explain New York values to shitloads of dimwit tee vee news clowns who just happen to live in NY.  That oughta be at least a little bit entertaining. 

UConn's Good, Real Good, And The Entire Team Should Line Up To Kick Dan Shaughnessy Square In The Nuts

Shaughnessy's a first-class douchenozzle, and it would be fitting to have the entire UConn women's team line up to kick him right in the balls.  That would be more positive attention than Shaughnessy deserves, but it would be fun as fuck to watch.

Jesus Christ, Ted Cruz Is One Creepy Motherfucker

Fuck, Cruz is the least appealing human on the face of the earth.  HDTV--hell, any tee vee--is not his friend.  From that vomitous lopsided rictus cracked into his face to his smarmy idiot's speech, Ted Cruz would definitely lose more than Trump's 59 states.  That guy is a fucking creep.

If Paul Ryan Even Attempts To Get The Nomination Away From Trump, Trump Will Be Wearing Ryan's Ear Around His Neck

And Ryan's shrunken head will be on permanent loan to the Donald J. Trump shrine at Mar-a-Lago.  If the establishment fights Trump, they will lose--the Republicans either run Trump as their nominee or they run no one.  That would be fine, too, as Trump will lose at least 59 states when Canada, Mexico, and at least seven other countries become US states just so they can vote against Trump.  When and if they try to steal the nomination from Trump, though, that's when Trump's legions go full-on cannibal and chew up and shit out everything the conservative establishment in Washington loves.  The only way the Republicans can have any hope--vain hope as Trump has already ruined them for all time--is to run with Trump and hope for some sort of miracle survival.  Not victory, but survival.  Their chances are not good, though.  Fortunately for the rest of us, Republicans are too stupid to comprehend the reality right in front of them, so they will be as entertaining as humanly possible as they bleed out, suffer, and die for our amusement.

UConn Is Torching Syracuse

Breanna Stewart is good.  Syracuse is not good enough to beat Stewart.  They never had any shot against Stewart and the rest of UConn.

The Conservative Establishment Hates Trump Because He's Stealing Their Fucking Lunch

The Republicans and Dems in Washington have had an easy time playing the fools in the hinterland for fools for a long fucking time, and all the sudden Trump comes in and kicks them in the nuts and takes their stuff.  Trump is easily as dumb as any Washington insider, but he's that outsider who knows how to burn down the establishment without really having to work very hard.

Lisa Montgomery Really Brings The Fox Business Election Coverage Down

That idiot "Kennedy" can't really keep up with the sparkling funfetti of ignorance and evil from Cavuto and his butt-pirate acolytes; she's too dim and simple even for those fucking dipshits.  Every time she opens her mouth the screamingly insane entertainment grinds to an awkward halt.  Even Charlie Gasparino can support the entertainment endeavor, and he's a fucking complete moron.  "Kennedy" is a fucking albatross.

The Hillary Email Thing Is The Most Retarded Lie Fox "News" Has Ever Cooked Up

Fox is completely deranged over this email nonsense.  This is fucking crazier than any of the shit Fox "News" ginned up during the Romney campaign or the GW "Retardboy" Bush administration.  Only the senile old folks and full-on fucktards who watch Fox "News" believe any of this shit.  Jesus.

George Mason University Was A High Point University Before There Was A High Point University

A fucking joke of a school for idiots, and now they have the ASS law school.  That sounds about right, and it makes perfect sense for a bumblefuck shithole that hosts the risible, Koch-sucking Mercatus Center.

Brutally Fisking Kevin Johnson Is America's Most Important Industry

Gods damn that was nice.  Johnson would be an especially nasty sack of crap even if wasn't accused of molesting vulnerable young girls.  Add that sick shit to the mix and you have a truly exceptional American bastard.  Now that most of the best of our nation is bored watching some fatuous tee vee asswhipes and beady-eyed Republican fuckwads pretend that Donald Trump is not currently sucking the marrow out of the GOP for grins, fisking Kevin Johnson would be the best thing for all of us.

PSA: John Kasich Is Still Losing To People Not Even Running

Future kid-sidekick to future President-for-Life Trump, John Kasich, is going to come in last behind some fucking loser not even eligible to get the GOP nomination.  Lest anyone think Kasich's running for president instead of running to be the comic relief for Donald Trump, ask yourself why someone who's been mathematically eliminated is really still in the race?

Since There Wasn't A Divine Smiting At The National Championship

I guess we can be sure that the gods were not available to smash any deserving assholes on national tee vee tonight.  That sucks.  At least North Carolina lost.

Live @ 5

Watch As Our Next President Hillary Clinton Wins Only The Fanatic Support Of Center-Right Dullards And Sad-Sack Obama Fluffers

If you ain't angry, you ain't payin' attention--and only the lamest of the horrible establishment Dems and their mindless backers will be truly enthusiastic for Hillary Clinton's presidency.  The rest of the sane and sensible of us will be somewhere between disinterested, disappointed, and mortified.  Since Hillary will be the next president, along with worse in every possible way than Sanders would be, nobody with any brains or class is really gonna be happy about Clinton, part deux.  These aren't the grown-ups looking for a grown-up candidate, and they aren't the smart or reasonable.  Nope.  These Clinton people are the dull and dumb Dems who either don't know any better or are too unimaginative to give a shit.  They suck hard.  Never doubt that.

The Huskies Lost, But The Huskies Are Still Gonna Win

Not gonna get a Husky Husky final, but with the Huskies still in it, we're pretty much guaranteed a Husky championship. 

Well, Syracuse Will Not Have A Chance To Have Dual Championships

But they didn't really have that chance anyway.  Villanova, though.  When it's your year, I guess it's your year.  Jeez.  Boeheim's a dick, anyway.  Fuck Syracuse.  Fuck NC, too.  And Villanova.  Let's pray for an asteroid impact or somethin'. 

Exceptional American Gothic

Heh, indeedy.  Apparently it's always a Sammy Hagar weekend somewhere in exceptional America.  Dirtballs in the parking lot getting wasted before a concert is probably a glory we will never experience again in our exceptional America.  If you tried this shit today, you'd be arrested and have to register as a felon or sex offender or some other sort of danger to society.  I can't say that's a good thing.  Cuz it's not.  These shitheads might have had abysmal taste in music, but they weren't hurting anyone.

The Great Hero And Freedom Fighter Tilikum Is Dying

It's a sad time for everyone who loves freedom.  Tilikum did more during his life to fight for freedom everywhere than most people do, and he's a fucking dolphin.  We will all miss him, and we should all be sad when he is gone, for we will not see the likes of him again.  Tilikum was robbed of his life and his freedom, but he learned and he fought back.  Because of him, many of his kind will live free in their natural environment, living the true life he never had a chance to experience.  He's a hero.  He will be mourned, but with the grace of all the gods in all the hells, never forgotten.

Vinegar Hill

Dan Shaughnessy Will Be The Man To Deliver Massachusetts For Trump

Future President-For-Life Trump should hop on the Dan Shaughnessy bandwagon and hire that fucking genius to deliver Massachusetts for Trump!  Shaughnessy is a well-known great fucking guy and will fit right in with the Trump campaign and presidency!

When One Of The Dumbest Motherfuckers On The Planet Says Something Is Too Smart, Kyle Smith Edition

Too smart from a profoundly stupid man is no compliment.  The sad, hacktackular Kyle Smith wouldn't recognize anything smart even if you gave him a fucking cartoon road map with a picture of the smart thing drawn on it with a red crayon.  BvS might be bad, but it can't possibly be so fucking brainless that Smith thinks it's smart, can it?

Point 5

Glassic

Donald Trump Meets With Rinse Pubies

If there was anybody left in the universe who didn't see that Donald Trump was the king of the Republican Party, RNC chair Rinse Pubies and the rest of the supplicants were out on their knees in public today.  This has been a great year for everyone in the world except the GOP, and that means it's been the best year ever!

A Two-Meter Sea-Level Rise By 2100 Is The End Of The Fucking World

Pretty much no average citizens have any idea how fucked they would be.  It's fun for inane Republicans, shameless dumb-fuck teabaggers, vile Koch-suckers, and other demented assholes on Fox "News" to belittle the impact, but such a sea-level rise would be devastating to civilization and stability.  There's no chance climate change will destroy the planet, but there is an excellent chance climate change will make our technological civilization impossible to sustain.  Ooops.

Ummm...Black Hole. Duh.

That's exactly how Farscape started.  It's a black hole satellite, so I'm sure it went through a black hole and was off on an adventure on the other side of the galaxy and now is back.  Duh.

Brian De Palma's Scarface Will Always Be One Of The Greatest American Comedies

There's probably more laughs-per-minute and exceptional American scenery-chewing in Scarface than in any 10 other flicks.  Timeless, hilarious.  Utterly brilliant.

President For Life Trump Is Right: Punish The Sluts For Abortions

Abortion is murder and women are sluts: PUNISH THEM!  What sort of exceptional, jesus-fluffing American patriot doesn't think that women should be punished for being sluts?  It is the best of America, and President-for-Life Trump will make sure every slut in America gets exactly what she deserves.

Picking Through The Wreckage Of The GOP Is America's Most Satisfying Hobby

Sifting through the shards of bone and chunks of offal of what used to be called the Republican Party is easily the most fun any exceptional American can have in 2016.  And the fun is going to continue for years and years, even long after the glory of a conservative political party bleeding out on worldwide cable television.  Trump's gonna be remembered as perhaps the greatest hero in American history, both for his cold-blooded murder of a loathsome conservative political party and his delivery of the funnest fun ever.

Sick Dude

President-For-Life Trump Knows Nobody Gives A Shit About What Women Think

Future President Trump knows Corey Lewandowski is a good guy.  And he know nobody gives a fuck about pushing around some annoying woman like Michelle Fields.  Fields has no friends out there who matter to Donald Trump.  Kicking women is always good politics when you're a Republican.  Michelle Fields was so fucking stupid that she never knew that till just now.

So, Batman V Superman Is Bad, But Not Bad Enough To Be Fun

Or too boring to be fun, I guess.  That sucks.  A shorter, less insultingly inept but still gloriously awful flick could have been good and really, really dumb fun.  But no.  It had to long and mostly boring without enough insane atrocity to make it worthwhile.  Shit.

Scott Walker, Proven Loser, Endorses Another Loser

The loser parade lead by Ted Cruz continues.  These stupid fuckers had better hope President Trump doesn't hold a grudge or anything.

Obama Endorsed Wasserman-Schultz

And she's the fucking worst.  Rahm sucks major moose cock, too, and both of those assholes are Obama's people.  That tells you all you need to know about Obama, and explains exactly why Obama has failed so many times when it seemed he should have had no problem winning.  He didn't fail at all but was doing exactly what he thought was right.

At Least We Know What Ted Cruz Did Before The Senate

Helping jesus with the kids.  That's exactly what jesus needed, obviously.  Now it should be clear who jesus wants in the White House next.

Idiot's Delights Never End

Jesus.  Boston Latin is not fucking Exeter or Andover.  Or even better, St. Paul's or Groton.  And BB&N is always and forever a day school.  A day school in fucking Cambridge, but still a day school, so you cannot try to compare it to a top boarding school, or any boarding school at all, without looking like a fucking asshole.  Boarding schools are not the best for every student, but trying to compare Boston Latin or BB&N is the sort of inanity that dipshits waste their time on in order to make themselves feel better about the fact that their kids didn't go to Groton. 

Don't Forget To Be Careful Out There, Even If You're A Pro

It surprising this shit doesn't happen more often.  As cycling has gotten bigger and bigger, with more and better coverage, the space for the actual riders has gotten smaller.  Funny how that works.  At some point, riders will have to stand up for safety, and the UCI and national organizations will need to set the standards. 

Fisking Paul Krugman

Carry on.  Krugman is the heart of the Democratic establishment, and that establishment decided on Hillary Clinton long before the election even started.  It's no surprise that the famous Democrats have been solid for Hillary, but that doesn't mean everybody shouldn't be rubbing their noses in it.

Notre Dame North Carolina Pretty Much Demands A Sinkhole Directly To The Ninth Circle Of Hell

A yuge drop straight to hell for those horrible people.  Please, jeebus.  Any time now.

Mekons Syracuse Myth

Yeah, Syracuse, But Better Than Fucking Virginia

Syracuse can sorta hit free throws too.  Genius.  Good to see the slime from Virginia lose at anything, so good job Syracuse, if it had to be Syarcuse.  The Syracuse women got it done, too.

Villanova Can Shoot Free Throws

Shocked to see a bigtime team that can actually hit the fucking free throws with the game on the line!  Imagine that.  Terrible to see Villanova move on, but at least the shitshow that is Kansas and Sam Brownback and the rest of those dickheads was beaten.  What's the matter with Kansas?  They suck balls.  Fuck Kansas.

Oh Fuck, What Happened With Daan Myngheer

Heart attack on the road at the Criterium International?  Jesus.  22 years old.  Is this a tragic undiagnosed heart defect or a brave new era of fatal doping recalling the glory days of the Dutch EPO experiments?  The kid's not dead, but his condition is very serious.  This is a horrible situation all around.  Jesus.

Aaannd Now Oregon Proves They Suck As Hard As You Always Knew They Did

Losing to any organization from Oklahoma should be enough to shut down the team, school, and state of Oregon out of pure shame.  From most popular to utter shit in two days.  Nice going, you fucking fuckers.

Well, Batman V Superman Sounds Like It's Great

A triumph!  I can just hope to jesus fucking christ that the sorry fucking flick is bad enough to warrant multiple viewings on $5 day at the theatre.  Please, let this thing suck hard enough to be entertaining.  Not exactly hopeful, tho...

Birdie Sanders For President

This is the most fucking chill sparrow in North America.  Exceptionally chill sparrow.  Any bird that got that close to Trump would probably be poisoned by all the shit Trump puts in his hair.  If a bird got that close to Cruz, he'd feel-up the bird and then try to fuck it apparently--as long as his wife wasn't looking.

Where's birdsrightsactivist when you need him for veep?

Today Was A Very Good Friday For America And Donald Trump, Praise Be To Jesus

Not such a good day for Ted Cruz.  Now we know another reason why Trump was so eager to get everyone but Cruz out--Katrina Pierson has been Trump's secret weapon all along.  But Pierson was not a secret to Cruz, and how could he be dumb enough to walk right into Trump's tacky abattoir?  Fucking moron.  So now, Trump's got a narrative, and it is that Cruz is an ineligible Canadian, and oh, by the way, he's also a serial adulterer.  Buh-bye Cruz.  It was also a very good Friday for the media clowns.  Non-stop entertainment and shitting all over the vile Ted Cruz is exactly the funfetti our society desires.  Donald Trump is easily the finest blessing jesus has ever bestowed on exceptional America.

And The National Enquirer is America's finest and most exceptional news source.

Political Song for Ted Cruz to Sing on Weekends

I think this song is gonna be on the next Kidz Bop.

Def NSFW tho, especially if you work at some pretty shitty place with wretched garbage people like Ted Cruz.

Allen West Is One Ugly Motherfucker

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.

Tonight It Had To Be Oregon

To beat Duke.  Even though they're Oregon, that makes them the most popular basketball team in the world tonight.

Dats Where The Stargate Is, Mofos!

The true dweebs got their revenge in the comments.  Considering that Stargate SG-1 was on for like a hundred years, the Cheyenne Mountain Complex was seen most of the time as the HQ for the stargate when compared to any Terminator flicks or War Games.

All A's

Ted Rall Would Make An Excellent Press Secretary For President Trump

Good pay AND a front-row seat for the non-stop calamity that will be the Trump administration.  Rall would be perfectly placed and in possession of the ideal temperament to be the face of Trump and talk us through the most exceptional days of America ever.  Glorious President Trump shouldn't want a yes-man as his mouthpiece and should appreciate that Rall will be laughing all the way down the slope straight to hell.

Americans Are The Biggest Idiots In The World

I mean, they gotta be.  IBD is just the place the dipshit-Americans and teabagger-Americans and Koch-suckers and other assorted assholes go for all the most sciencey science.  Brilliant!  At some point, we are gonna have to send things like IBD and people like John Merline to live on their own islands far away in order to make the rest of us a bit smarter.

Alabama's Governor Sucks At Phone Sex

He's like a thousand years old--make him stop.  He sucks at that game.  Robert Bentley is yet another perfect family-values Republican creepster violating all the bullshit "morals" he pretends are oh so important, but he needs use sign language or something to make his girlfriend all wet and sticky so we don't have to listen to it.  Maddow was all over this shit show tonight, and it wasn't offensive at all, simply sad.  Very sad.  Funny.  But very sad.  And funny. 

Mitt Romney And Jeb! Bush And Ted Cruz

It's the loser parade!  Bringing out these loser idiots is not going to help Ted Cruz at all.  In fact, it's definitely hurting him.  Utah aside, Cruz is on the glorious glide path of epic failure, and will end 2016 having lost the presidency in comically inept way along with alienating every single politician in the USA who could actually help him further his career.  That's pretty fucking fun!

John Kasich Is Already Running As Trump's VP

Even the dumb bunnies at National Review have almost figured that out--and that's not nothing cuz those people are fucking idiots.  What John Kasich wants to do is keep himself visible while at the same time helping to prevent any surprises from Ted Cruz or whatever is left of the GOP establishment.  Kasich gets the double when he helps Trump and helps himself at the same time.  Kasich makes sense for Trump as well, being a sitting governor, sorta, and being from Ohio.  Even Kasich can see that without too much help, and you can be sure Trump sees it. 

Your Yearly Elite Boarding School Inanity

This and this.

Both of these lists were clearly compiled by people who had no knowledge of boarding schools.

If you have an endowment of $40,000 per student, you don't belong on any list with Groton or any of the Big-6.  Make the fucking list top 40 or top 30 if you have to scrape that far down into the bottom of the barrel. 

Hockaday is not a boarding school, nor is Milton, nor St. Alban's, nor Indian Springs.  If you have a 50/50 or worse boarding percentage, you're a day school.  These schools don't belong on the list, and neither do the other glorified day schools on the lists with a minority boarding percentage.  Fucking stupid.

Any list that has Emma Willard or Westover above Miss Porter's is fucking ridiculous.  Emma and Westover are good schools, but Miss Porter's is the best and most prestigious all-girls school out there by far.  And probably will be as long as there are still all-girls schools.

Any list with Andover or Exeter on the top is fucking useless.  Andover and Exeter are the only boarding schools any civilians can name.  The best school is probably St. Paul's, or maybe Groton if you want a very small school--unless you're a swimmer.  Then it's probably Hotchkiss, unless you want to do crew.  Then Deerfield.  Andover and Exeter are like Harvard and Yale, for better and worse, with plenty of opportunities and brand recognition.

Regardless, the traditional Big-5, Andover, Choate, Exeter, Hotchkiss, St. Paul's, now joined by Deerfield for an effective Big-6, are the best of the best for reasons beyond last year's test scores and college admissions, and people will pay a premium for those damn good reasons.  Lawrenceville and Northfield Mount Hermon play in that traditional sandbox with the Big-6 as well, and don't ever believe that doesn't count for something.  These peer schools are self-selecting, and they haven't self-selected any other schools in 40 fucking years.

Not Voting For Hillary Will Be 2016's Hottest Trend

Not gonna help & not gonna matter.  The fucking nightmare is that 2017's hottest trend will be shitting all over the horror show that is the Clinton administration part 2.

Hillary Clinton: Neocon Queen

Even yet still another reason some people aren't votin' for her.  There's nothing good about Clinton's position on Palestine.  In fact Clinton is wrong as anyone in the world.  Anyone who votes or has voted for Clinton over Sanders should be recognized an irredeemable stupid and evil motherfucker.

Compared To Real Terrorist Organizations Like The NRA And AIPAC, ISIS Is A Cub Scout Troup

Those fucking dirtballs in ISIS and all those other fundamentalist idiots are nothing when compared to real terrorists like the National Rife Association and the American Israel Public Affairs Committee.  Unlike ISIS, those true terrorists have the ability to destroy societies, obliterate nations, and ruin the lives of millions of innocent human beings all over the world.  ISIS would give their left nuts to be as evil and insane and destructive as the NRA and AIPAC.

In Trump's World, Rob Ford Was Redundant

Now that we got Donald Trump, we didn't need goofy old Rob Ford anymore.  Such is the life and death of nasty right wing ass clown.

Miserable Fat Belgian Bastards Explode

Fuck ISIS, I'd look to the Limey scumbags first.  ISIS probably had little or nothing to do with this beyond taking the Donald Trump-esque credit for the shitty fucking thing.  The fucking Brits, though, those assholes could easily have done this.  Everyone knows they can't be trusted.


miserable fat belgian bastards from Steve Farrell on Vimeo.

But This Cuba Shit, That Is An Unequivocal Major Win For Obama And His Legacy

Big fucking deal for America and a big fucking deal for Cuba.  Obama's done well with this, and it will go down as one of the true triumphs of his presidency.  Even better, it drives the shithead Republicans, rancid teabagging fuckwits, and asshole Cuban Americans fucking apoplectic--that might be the best part of all.  The US plays nice with Saudi Arabia and China and Great Britain and Kuwait and almost all the rest of the shittiest places on this fucking planet, so it is about time we spread the love to our neighborly Cuban brothers and sisters.  Obama has shown true leadership and deserves the credit.  Opening relations with Cuba should have been done long ago, but Obama took the initiative where others failed.  Good shit.  Props to El Presidente Barry Soetoro Barack HUSSEIN Obama.

Update: Sometimes Obama is pretty fucking cool.  Heh, indeedy.  No fucks left to give.  And conservatives are so fucking stupid that they defy comedy.

This Is At Least Gives Some Small Hope Obama Will Win The Merrick Garland Game

This idiot.  Welfare academia is wrong, often wrong about things, so this is a fainty faint glimmer.  Obama's big loss right at the end on Garland, if it is indeed a loss, will be a big black mark on Obama's legacy.  But when Scott Lemieux says you will lose, that means maybe you won't, so light a frakking candle and hope for a surprise win by Obama, a win that will very likely be the final nail in the coffin of the GOP.

Elizabeth Warren Kicks President Trump Where It Hurts

The only problem is that Clinton would never be able to pull this off.  Clinton will need a VP candidate who can troll Trump with elan.  That won't be Warren, but this is the model of how to defeat Trump easily at his own game.  Are the Clinton people paying attention? 

Virag's Movie Reviews: Ant-Man (2015)

Good movie.  Good enough, anyway.  Was it the idiot little brother of Iron Man?  Sure.  Was it yet another remarkably predictable Marvel flick with a mirror-image villain?  You bet.  It was entertaining though, watchable.  Paul Rudd has gotten less annoying as he's aged, and Michael Douglas was up to the meager requirements of his Hank Pym.  Ant-Man did what it needed to do and was at least as useful as the first Captain America and the Thor movies. 

Something Useful On The Serotta Forum

The thread regarding this frame.  It's nice that Richard Sachs wants to defend the builder, but a close inspection of such a frame by a frame builder with a lesser reputation than Sachs, especially in that color, makes the joinery look pretty half-assed.  Could a builder like RS get away with it?  Sure.  Does it do the up-and-comer any good to have this garbage out there?  Nope.  The frame looks like a home-build, not a pro-build.

This Is How You Get Alan Grayson, ATMO

Alan Grayson, not your average bear in the Congress--and the "liberals" who get all huffy about Grayson are almost always hypocrites or ass clowns.  Grayson, like Sanders, is a successful, career politician, and expecting him to be anything other than that is naive bordering on insane.  The question for Geoff Dutton and everyone else is whether Grayson represents something beyond that usual successful career politician.  Dutton says yes.  And he is right.  Grayson is far from perfect, but compared to the rest of the Congress and especially his primary opponent, the indefensible neo-con sack of shit Patrick Murphy, Grayson is a revelation. 

If Ted Cruz Is The Lead Singer Of Stryper, Donald Trump Must Be The Lead Singer Of Steel Panther

Donald Trump and Steel Panther will make America so very white again.  There's nothing whiter than a sickly sweet parody of shitty hair metal, and Donald Trump knows it!

Political Song for The Republican Party to Sing

The Republican Party Wishes The Lead Singer Of Stryper Was Running Instead Of Ted Cruz

Michael Sweet would have had a better chance of getting the Republican nomination than Ted Cruz ever did.  Sweet is a yuge christian wackjob but not nearly as replusive as Cruz.  Plus the 1980s poodle-hair wig is way more attractive than anything Ted Cruz could possibly manage on his best day.

Can Yale Get It Done Against Duke?

Can Yale do it for Gucci?  Can Yale be the most popular college basketball team in the world today?

Doesn't look like it so far...

Did You Really Need To Read The Execrable Ayn Rand To Learn Everyone Has Wants And Needs?

Really?  Cuz that leads me to think that maybe you never read anything OTHER than Ayn Rand's dreadful tripe.  Pretty much any decent novel will portray characters who are conflicted but not evil, who have desires and goals but who are not shallow as a puddle and dumb as fucking rocks.  Kids can be stupid, but if you're gonna be lame enough to waste time reading Ayn Rand, drop your dick for a minute and get to the fucking library or something.  Jesus.

Will Obama Win The Merrick Garland Game?

President Obama is very fortunate that his enemies are the hilariously incompetent and comically evil GOP, but a bit too much of Obama's legacy now rests on this nomination.  Obama's banking on the continued failure of the Republicans in Congress to accomplish anything beyond risible fuck-ups, but if those dipshits somehow win this one right at the end, Obama will look like a buffoon exactly as the book is closed on his tenure.  That's a tough one.  So far, Obama is seeing the wall of GOP obstruction crack but only superficially.  For now the foundation of unconstitutional incompetence holds strong for the Republicans. 

Bernie Is Still A Senator, Still A Politician

And there's no way he's not going to endorse the Democratic nominee, even though that nominee will be Hillary Clinton.  Sanders could have run as a third-party candidate.  But when he ran as a Dem, that should have told you all you need to know about where he would finish his campaign.  Not to say that Sanders would not be a better President than Clinton in every way, but Sanders knew going in that Clinton would most likely be the nominee no matter how well he ran.  Nothing has changed.  Clinton is no better and no worse than when she started, and Sanders decided to run in her party.  Dave Lindorff should probably know that by now, x-specially after watching Obama for the last seven years.

Lee Papa Gets Down & Dirty With The Hot & Horny GOP

The Republican Party is not so much a hate-fuck orgy as much as it is a hate circle jerk.  Not a one of them has any idea what to do, so the party will do what it always does: get in line and follow their leader.  Unfortunately for them, that leader is Donald J. Trump.

Racist Fuckstains Of The Day, Today

As seen on Fox "News" last night.  Hannity was fluffing these pathetic losers on his tee vee show, and it was every bit as sad as you would expect.  There's nothing too special about these guys, as they are exactly the nasty, little, stupid creepsters they seem to be. 

Drink Up, You Feckin Feckers

Slainte!

Now We Are Truly In The Dark Days Of 2016

Trump's committed genocide on the Republican Party and disemboweled Fox "News"--that was way fun, but that good shit is ended.  Now all that's left for us is the actual Trump campaign, and that's fucking awful in every fucking way.  Plus the gloom of the shit show that is the oncoming Hillary Clinton presidency is just going to become more smothering every gods-damned day.  There will be no fun left in the campaign, no entertainment, no hope for sublime amusement.  It's all racist fucksticks and humiliating Clinton mini-disasters from here on out.  We had joy.  We had it all.  It was lovely.  Today everything is fucking black.  Reality is going to get more depressing every day.

Today Donald Trump Killed Fox "News" For Fun

You won't hear about it on Fox "News", but Trump decided to put the whole channel out of its misery today.  He did it because he could.  For fun.  Fox "News" used to rule over Republicans but no more.  Trump knew he could obliterate them, and he did.  Thanks, Trump.

Jill Stein Is Running For President

Some people will always be better than the usual Democratic Party idiots, and for those good folks, Jill Stein.  Not every Dem will vote for Hillary, even if every single Republican will follow the leader and vote for Trump.  For those Dems who are too smart for another Clinton, Jill Stein.  If you want to vote for someone who doesn't suck in almost every possible way, Jill Stein.  Hillary's gonna win in November, but you don't have to vote for her if you don't want to.  You can vote for Jill Stein.  That way you'll be able to live with yourself for a while.

Charlie Gasparino Might Be The Dumbest TV Republican In America

Gasparino is on Fox Business squeaking incoherently about how Trump is not going to be the Republican nominee and "they" will stop him.  Even the other stupid motherfuckers on that channel can see that Trump is already the Republican nominee, and if it's not Trump then the Republicans will not be running a candidate in 2016.  When you stand out as a noticeably bigger idiot than the usual Fox Business crew of Neil Cavuto, Lou Dobbs, Trish Regan, and Maria Bartiromo, that is quite a fucking accomplishment.  Nice going, Gasparino!  You're a bigger fucking moron than even Eric Bolling!

How Big Of An Asshole Do You Have To Be To Realize Hillary Sucks On 15 March, 2016?

Jesus fucking christ, what a maroon.  Seriously, welfare academia is making everyone stupider, not just the sad students trapped at those shitty colleges.

Why Is This Idiot Kasich Pretending That Winning Ohio Is Anything Other Than A Bare Minimum For An Epic Loser?

Though, as the votes come in, his lead is shrinking.  It won't be enough for Trump to take Ohio, but John Kasich is now the biggest loser in this race.  John Kasich's not winning anything in 2016 other than his own state by probably less than 5%, and that is an embarrassment by any measure.

Now We Say Goodbye To Marco Rubio, The Most Entertainingly Pathetic Loser In American Political History

Rubio has always sucked titanic moose cock, and anyone actually paying attention knew his presidential campaign would never get traction anywhere in our blighted land.  But my gods, Rubio has been even more hilariously inept than even I would have ever believed.  Make no mistake, Rubio is loathsome conservative cocksucker, but his astounding incompetence as a candidate has overwhelmed his frightening ignorance and black-hearted evil.  So, now we say bye-bye to risible dullard, fatuous shitstain, religious maniac, and bathetic assclown Marco Rubio, a man stupid enough to give up his Senate seat in a hopeless bid for the Republican nomination, hoping for ourselves and our children we never have to hear from him again in our gods-damned America.  Fuck off and die, loser.  Nobody ever liked you.  You are a fucking disgrace.

The Boring Anti-Climax Of Trump's Stunning Victory

Even Fox Business is having trouble ginning up any of their usual squealing insanity over tonight's election results.  Trump's beaten them.  He's crushed their spirits.  Whether Trump wins Ohio or loses Ohio, he has had the nomination locked up for a couple of weeks now; Sam Wang's is way overthinking this shit.  The anti-Trump vote was gelded long ago, and there was never any chance of a brokered convention because it is not in the utterly unimaginative nature of the Republican mindset.  The hopeless authoritarian idiots in the Republican Party were always going to fall in line behind Trump and his vulgar army of supporters.  Tonight all this is sad theater. 

Political Song for Obama's Mojito to Sing

Trump Campaign Armbands Are The Future!

So stylish!  Official Trump armbands would go great with any brown shirt, and even look good on the tee vee!  Trump armbands are what American needs!

Yeah, But...Jesus, You Guys Are Dimwits

Fuckin' welfare academia is dim as fuck.

The thing they're missing about Trump v Cruz, or "What Would Suck Less" is that Trump has ABSOLUTELY NO political connection with the Republican OR Democratic establishments.  Trump will not be able to function within the establishment political process in any way.

IF the Republicans unite behind Cruz, Cruz WILL have at least a little stick with the party, making a potential Cruz administration's violent conservative inanity worse than Trump's insane incompetence due to assistance of the Republicans and compliance of spineless, hopeless Democrats.

Where a President Trump could be very fucking scary would be with an aroused and inflamed well-lubricated white racist army at his command to fuck with the day-to-day American life because President Trump has been unable to bend the American political establishment to his demented will.

But that would be so much more entertaining on the tee vee.  How could anyone not wish for a deranged Trump presidency?  Even strivers like entry-level Democratic establishment pissboys trapped in a threadbare welfare academia sinecure?