Friday, May 25, 2018
The Fuckin' Micks Get It Right Again
Good job, Paddy! The drunken fuckers are on the right side of history again.
Olbermann And ESPN, Together Again
It would be fitting if Keith Olbermann went back to Bristol to turn off the lights when ESPN finally closes for good. Nobody will have cable anymore, and Keith, who was often great on the air for those clowns, can shut the lights and close the doors.
Thursday, May 24, 2018
Kim Jong-un, On The Other Hand, Is Not At All Sick Of Winning
Donald Trump is the best fucking thing that could have ever happened to that stupid fat shrimpy fuck in North Korea. Kim Jong-un looks like a conquering hero and brilliant leader compared to the angsty incompetence of Donald Trump. If North Korea needed someone to make 'em all look good, well the USA took care of that for free. Thanks, Trump!
Moon Jai-In Is Getting Pretty Fucking Sick Of All That Winning Now
Poor bastard is going to need a specialist after being so fucking sick of all that winning with Trump. Who could have predicted so fucking much winning, every fucking day with the winning. Sick! Thanks, Trump.
Never Forget That The Noted Plagiarist Ben Domench-McCain's Dumb Website Sucks Major Dog Dick
The Federalist is quite possibly the dumbest hate slash teabagging propaganda website in the galaxy. Ben Domenech-McCain is known for two things: being a risible plagiarist and marrying that stupid daughter of John McCain.
Gods Damn You Boston Celtics, Get This Shit Done
Do if for freedom! Do it for the children! For the joyous and not-at-all-miserable-and-racist-as-fuck city of Boston! Come on, ya useless bastards, win one more fuckin' game.
Wednesday, May 23, 2018
Michael Cohen Is Well And Truly Fucked
The Taxi King is just the next nail in his coffin. Cohen's also such a miserable fuckwad that nobody is going to lift a finger to help him, not Trump especially. Cohen so so fucked, and I wonder if that horrible dumb fucker even knows how fucked. Thanks, Trump.
CinemaSins Does The Gods' Work On 'The Last Jedi'
CinemaSins leaves the snark behind and gets into the shit with the shit that is The Last Jedi. J.J. Abrams may be a fucking talentless hack douche, but making a movie better than The Force Awakens should have been fucking obvious; clearly Rian Johnson is a screaming incompetent worthy of a low-level Trump employee. How many people just don't give a shit about Star Wars anymore after that dumb flick?
Twits Versus Strength, The Movie
Not really, but hasn't Strong the man and Strong the bike company been at this carbon project for a while now? Haven't I been getting the emails occasionally for quite some time? We may never know the answers to these questions, but tune in next time for another exciting episode of Bullshit, or Not? Seriously, Carl Strong has had more business plans than fucking Serotta--remember the stock size mountain and road bikes; the Ibis bikes built by Strong's production shop; the bike shop/factory; the lugged custom frames; the winter sale; what else?--yet he's still out there doing it. I wonder why that is? Zathras?
You Cannot Find A More Pathetic Grovelling Whore Than Doug Schoen
He earns his ducats, though. Schoen is never afraid to guzzle any amount of rancid piss for his masters, so him calling moderate, centrist, popular Democrats far-left progressives in order to scare the geriatric shut-ins who watch Fox "News" is easy work.
Tuesday, May 22, 2018
George Nader Rapidly Becoming Sick Of All This Fucking Winning
Vile pedo creep George Nader is probably pretty fucking sick of all the winning about now. Nader probably wishes he had stayed a billion miles from a toxic orange loser like Trump because now all the world will know that George Nader is a disgusting pedophile. Thanks, Trump!
Some Of The Most Insipid Pop Culture Slash Star Wars Writing You Will Ever See
Brain-dead fanbois get shit on constantly, and vacuous tools like Drew Dietsch are a big reason why. Even huge Star Wars geeks/fans should have big problems with both of the last two flicks, but the obeisant creeps like Dietsch are almost as awful as the movies! Jesus frakking christ on wheels. Grow up you fucking losers.
Monday, May 21, 2018
Speaking Of Crazy, Spitting Conservative Mongrels: Jeanine Pirro
That psycho bitch Jeanine Pirro loves her some Jeff Sessions. Pirro might be an unhinged, right-wing asswipe, but she also apparently doesn't seem to understand that Jeff Sessions is part of Trump's administration. I mean Trump always gets the best people. All the best people. Smart people. The best. And Pirro is doing her part to bring braying insanity to teabaggers everywhere. Thanks, Trump.
Insane Teabagging Dunce Of The Day, Today
Jennifer Hoffman. She seems to be a special kind of fucking screaming reactionary guntard asshole. Wonderful. Thanks, Trump.
Hey, Neoliberal Dipshit, Obama Had The Power To Prevent Gorsuch
That fucktard Karoli seems to have forgotten how Obama got utterly deboned by the GOP over Merrick Garland. Obama certainly could have made a recess appointment of an actual leftist judge after threatening to as part of an effort to force the Republicans into voting in Garland. But he didn't. He sat there like a simp and preened for the camera while a fucking loser like Mitch McConnell fucked him in the ass and laughed about it. Gorsuch sucks, but he's Obama's legacy.
Sunday, May 20, 2018
Saturday, May 19, 2018
Melanie Trump Is The Best Trump
Better than any other Trump in the whole wide world! All the bad, bad people pointing out that Trump never misspells Ivanka's name are bad, bad people for implying that Trump wants to fuck his fugly plastic surgery victim daughter.
Friday, May 18, 2018
Today's School Shooting In Trump's America
Today's school shooting is not tomorrow's school shooting. Or yesterday's. And Trump's America is your America. These disgusting racist guntard lunatics are always rock-ribbed GOP true-believers in your America. They will never stop killing kids, never stop killing. Thanks, Trump. Your welcome.
Julia Ioffe, Corn Cob, Delete Your Account
Stop your cobbing. That woman is a dolt. If you stand up for a creepy racist teabagging asshole, please never be surprised when people accuse you of supporting a creepy racist teabagging asshole. Julia Ioffe is exactly the sort of dunce who should be palling around with John Podhoretz and completing secret missions for Donald Trump.
John Podhoretz: American Intellectual
That fat fuck Podhoretz is all brains. All brains. The guy's sharp. Sharp as a tictac.
Twit Versus Twit
Don't come between a twit and his Wiggle! Or someone else's Wiggle on CraigsList. Or something. I don't know. Tedious or funny? Who fucking cares.
Nice To See The Bad Guys Are Fucking Scared--And When Racist Conservatives Start Screaming 'Socialism' You Know You're Good
Conflating totalitarian fascist governments to Democratic Socialism is sadly very effective in frightening a certain low-information fuckbrain racist cohort of teabagging cocksuckers, but seeing the assclowns on the right start shitting their pants is good gods-damn fun. There are a shit ton of these "editorials" out this spring, so I take that as a very good sign for the future.
Thursday, May 17, 2018
Nobody Tell The Gossip Kids Kirsten Gillibrand Is A Rock-Ribbed Neoliberal Dipshit
Gillibrand is a big or bigger problem for America than Franken ever was. Kirsten Gillibrand is a nakedly careerist creep, but in 2018 the Dems are fucked more ways than this one.
Wednesday, May 16, 2018
I Think We Found Today's Dumbest Twit
This Colker asshole is such a screaming maroon that even the other twits drag him mercilessly. When a lame-brained twit manages to cob himself right there in front of the others, that's quite a thing.
The Celtics Are Just Teasing Us
They'll find a way to lose; they'll fail to eliminate Cleveland. Of course, they will. Been fun so far, though. Fuckers.
Tuesday, May 15, 2018
Says Who?
I was a fan through the October and into War period, but I always hated this song. The only thing to celebrate is Dave Evans' hair.
Tomi Lahren Should Stick To Cut-Rate Plastic Surgery
She's not pretty enough yet and too stupid to talk, so she should stick with what she knows, getting the most plastic surgery you can at your local strip mall. Maybe in a few more years she can try the tee vee thing again.
The Dems Failure To Stop Gina Haspel Should Destroy Their Party Forever
Once again, the establishment Dems wish to remind you that there is absolutely no difference between the Dem establishment and the GOP establishment. The only power the Dems have is to oppose Trump, and they may have been able to block his appointment of a disgusting war criminal to a top post, but they refuse to. Chuck Schumer should have been leading the charge to stop Haspel and deny Trump his pick, much the same way Mitch McConnell denied Obama most of his appointments. Why in the hell should anyone who opposes the petty fascist incompetence of Trump and the rest of the racist GOP support any Democrat?
2017 Lugged Raleigh Team, What A Weird Bike
We don't do much with Raleigh any more, especially road bikes, so this one completely escaped my notice. And it musta been a dud, as they are still flogging them two years later, but the thing is really odd. The spec is pretty fucking nuts with mostly silver mostly Campag, genuine Nitto bar, stem, and post, and a Turbo saddle, and it looks fucking great and even has horizontal drops, a threaded headset, and proper downtube shifter bosses, but the geometry is a fucking nightmare; why the hell didn't they just copy the geometry of an RB-1? The interwebs rumors say this is a Japanese market model pinched by the USA company. Oh, well. Coulda been a fun bike if it had actually fit properly.
'Spider-Man 2' Is Still The Best Superhero Movie
It's not perfect, but it has an almost perfect structure, and the flick is filled with good performances. The Marvel movies may have perfected the ATM technology, but as a movie, Spider-Man 2 is better than any of 'em. Hell, even James Franco is more or less tolerable in the thing, so that's unusual.
Monday, May 14, 2018
Bad News: That Evil Cocksucker Krazy Kripple Krauthammer Is Not Dead Yet
That miserable fucking bastard Charles Krauthammer is still alive, apparently. I guess it's fitting that a fucking useless hateful shitbag like KKKrauthammer would be part of the offensively dumb Jerusalem thing that Trump and Netanyahu fucked up today.
As Everyone Should Have Known, South Africa Has More Of A Sense Of Decency Than The USA
South Africa, former apartheid state, understands violent racism better than the USA, current violent racist state, does. Thanks, Trump!
Jeanine Pirro Is A Fucking Lunatic
Pirro is batshit fucking crazy and should not be running around loose. People who believe in fairy tales are too fucking stupid to be trusted in polite society and should be eating soft foods in a padded cell somewhere with cheerful attendants and helpers making sure they stay clean and get their diapers changed. Talking about insane biblical prophecies or space aliens or any of that shit should be enough to brand you a screaming fucktard forever. Plus, we know Jeanine Pirro's a slut, too. That's too fucking disgusting to contemplate.
The Boston Celtics Are Fucking Evil
Sure, they blew out fucking Cleveland in game 1, but they will lose this series, and that will suck for everyone. The world is shitty enough without the wretched Cavaliers winning anything. Fuckers.
Sunday, May 13, 2018
St. Paul's School Has A Target On Its Back Now
They're turning their school into a separate piece of shit from a public-relations standpoint. The school fucked up the Owen Labrie/Chessy Prout case, and now they're going to be unable to stop anyone who wants to fuck with them, case or no case, for a good while. It's fine to come clean, as St. Paul's and Choate and many others attempted to do, but that weakness is a call for everyone to piss on you, rightly or wrongly. Luckily for all these schools, America will not run out of that very specific traditional cohort of the upper-class who are willing to pay the bills at these types of institutions. The only class of student who may suffer from all this shit is the 5% who make up the genuinely smart, motivated, financial aid kids.
Saturday, May 12, 2018
Some Of Our Dumbest And Most Annoying Americans Have Been Police And/Or Military
Those two pathetic lifestyles attract the dregs and the thugs and creeps. Someday we'll put these fools down and make our society quite a bit more intelligent.
Friday, May 11, 2018
Shit, 'The Expanse' Is Cancelled
SyFy sucks at this game. They couldn't make BSG a good show for more than 10 or 12 episodes, they destroyed Farscape, and they couldn't even do middlin' shit like Killjoys and Dark Matter, so just as The Expanse was fixin' to turn into Stargate 2001, the network realized it cost a shitload of money and cancelled the whole fucking thing. Time to bring back ghost huntin', Bigfoot trackin', and wrastlin'. Morons.
A.J. Delgado, Vile GOP Teabagging Slut, Is Also A Destitute GOP Tebagging Whore
Holy fucking christ on a moped, this is loverly. I think it's beyond hilarious that this wrinkly old washer woman slut A.J. Delgado gets knocked up by a married guy, foolishly shits out the wretched bastard spawn, gets canned from her Trumptard sinecure, has to crawl back to her mother with her fucking bastard in tow, and then has to beg for money because the married guy and his family are gonna brutalize her in court and get custody of said bastard. By all the gods in all the hells, this is the kind of shit that makes me a little bit thankful the universe exists, and that we all get to be so wonderfully entertained by all the insane conservative stupidity out there. Thanks, Trump!
Thursday, May 10, 2018
Trek Trolls Twits With A Fake Bontrager
Trek thought it would be funny to make a fake Bontrager frame to troll the twits. I guess it's not technically fake since Trek owns the Bontrager name, but apparently Keith Bontrager had nothing to do with this bike.
Holy Shit, Kimberly Guilfoyle Is A Yuge Slut!
Gods damn, Kimberly Guilfoyle is not just a Fox "News" whore, but a ginormous, skanky, cum-burping slut as well! She will clearly fuck anything: First the Mooch and now Trump, Jr. I'd imagine just the VD alone boiling away in that rancid roastie would be enough to kill a fucking rhino.
Wednesday, May 9, 2018
Gina Haspel Is Obama's Fault
If Obama had had the courage to defy the neoliberal establishment and prosecute the war crimes which occurred under Cheney and Bush, Gina Haspel would be long dead or locked in a small, dark concrete cell 23 hours a day. But he didn't. Obama lacked courage. And wisdom. And everything else he needed to be a true leader, so now we have the torturers and other war criminals parading around free in every aspect of American government, never having been made to answer for their crimes, under the auspices of the helplessly stupid petty fascist retards surrounding Trump. Thanks, Obama.
Conservative Fuckface Ed Rogers Is A Lying Cunt, Too
Pro tip: every conservative is a cunt. Conservatives are always wrong about everything. Ed Rogers is a fatuous Reagan-era fossil who probably actually believes that socialism for the majority is evil, but socialism for the sole benefit of the plutocrats, as in the USA in 2018, is just fucking fine and dandy. Well, get your skull-fucking boots on, because before he gets the guillotine he so richly deserves, Ed Rogers, along with the rest of his nasty plutocrat friends, should get a festive skull-fucking.
Sally Pipes Is A Lying Cunt, Always And Forever, Amen--And She Gets Paid By The Health Insurance Industry To Lie
So please jesus, skull fuck her mercilessly for eternity. Amen. Sally C. Pipes is that especially loathsome conservative who gets paid to lie because they're not good enough at sucking cock, or anything else, to get paid for that. Dinesh D'Souza's another one of those. Anywho, Pipes can always be counted on the spew up whatever bullshit her masters demand, but you can always count on the fact that 100% of what she says is a lie. Health care in Canada works very much better for everyone than it does in the USA, and you could not find a genuine Canadian who would trade their system for the shit show in America. It's nice work to be a lying conservative piece of human filth. Just ask Sally Pipes.
Fuck You Don Blankenship You Fucking Disgusting Loser
Thanks for nothing, cocksucker. That race in WV will be way more boring now cuz you suck major dog dick.
Neoliberal Assholes Are The Democratic Party Establishment
And they are reactionary idiots. Trump's screaming, teabagging retards are not the only mental-defectives undoing our society. The rock-ribbed conservative Clinton crowd are every bit as vile.
Tuesday, May 8, 2018
Monday, May 7, 2018
Barbara Ehrenreich, National Treasure
Barbara Ehrenreich has a record anybody would be wicked proud of. She's been a vibrant writer and intellectual for decades, decades during which the promise of American society has corroded beyond repair, and Ehrenreich has worked to give a voice to that tragedy.
Go, Blankenship, Go!
Come on, you vile murderous cocksucker, win that fucking primary for the good of hilarity! Let's all pray to jesus frakking christ on toast that Don Blankenship comes in first place tomorrow because West Virginia is stuffed with the dumbest fucking racist conservative assholes in the known universe, and that Blankenship takes his rightful place as a GOP leader! Thanks, Trump.
Sunday, May 6, 2018
Matt Walsh, Delete Your Account
This is the sort of comprehensive cobbing humans rarely witness. Former hateful conservative airhead and nasty reactionary fuckwad Matt Walsh decided to end his time as a human and transmogrify himself into a corn cob right there on Twitter for our amusement. Thanks, Trump
This Is What A Self-Hating, Impotent, Bed-Wetting Closet Case Looks Like
A real alpha man. Sure. If this fucking racist pussy homo could just learn to love himself and his boiling, never-ending desire for sweet rock-hard man meat, all his problems would disappear. But since he's a conservative fuckhead, he's gonna have to live a life of hilarious desperation while fondling his metal penis substitute.
Rudy Giuliani: Super Genius
Giuliani: greasy, lispy, bald, anus-faced guinea or the gods' gift to comedy and joy? Why not both? Giuliani is spending 2018 making himself look even more idiotic than his previous seven decades of loathsome buffoonery have. That's not easy! Thanks Trump!
Fake Fake Fake Fake FAKE! THE EARTH IS FLAT! DEEP STATE OBAMA SATAN
Save us Trump! We all know the Earth is flat, so please jesus and Trump, save us from the homosexual commie deep state ivory tower illuminati lamestream media fake news Satan science Obama jade helm new world order!
Even Headsets Confuse The Twits
Skull fuck them. Maybe I'm being a tad harsh. But headsets are easy: Chris King is a perfect product. And they have a solution to fit almost any possible bike. If you want a classic-looking threaded headset for a rider, then the Tange Levin alloy is the perfect product in that situation. Otherwise, plenty of headsets work well and are well-made, including Cane Creek and Campagnolo, but the CKs are the best you can do, period.
Saturday, May 5, 2018
Krugman Shuffles In With A Straightforward Drive-By Fisking Of Rudy Giuliani
That lispy, greasy anus-faced shitbag Giuliani never made a friend in the universe with an IQ above 7, which is undoubtedly why Trump and George W Bush loved the disgusting racist incompetent imothefucking cocksucker. Giuliani did marry his cousin, though, so that gets him props from the inbred bigot KKK/hillbilly cohort.
Friday, May 4, 2018
Well, I Guess Giuliani Is A Worse Lawyer Than Michael Cohen Or Imani Gandy
Or at least just as bad. Giuliani is bumbling around out there like a senile old whore looking for a dick to suck. Good thing Trump always gets the best people. Only the best people. Thanks, Trump.
Michael Skakel Or Jeffrey Toobin: Who's The Bigger Douche?
Skakel is a Kennedy, who probably didn't kill that girl because Toobin and racist fuckbrain Mark Fuhrman say he did. That's pretty much the entire case right there. Toobin is a vile greasy cocksucker, a horrible tee vee lawyer jerkoff, and notorious fucker of slutty upper-class buffoon Casey Greenfield. So, obviously, Jeffrey Toobin is a fucking genius. Thanks, Trump.
Thursday, May 3, 2018
Routinely Awful GOP Cockbag Rick Wilson Has Some Funny
Not bad. Wilson might hate Trump, but he's still a rock-ribbed conservative piece of shit.
Teabagging Trumptards Like Kurt Schlichter Are So Fucking Dumb, They Think They're Winning
Nobody explain to these bed-wetting mental-defectives like Kurt Schlichter what winning really means because I'm counting on a most entertaining mass suicide when their orange shitgibbon gets his due. Plus, Trump's gargantuan failure is the only thing protecting the world from the GOP agenda for another nine months, so keep sucking that cock and guzzling down that winning piss, Schilchter. That's a good boy. Thanks, Trump.
How Much More Sick Of All That Winning Can Trumptard Dipshit Michael Cohen Get?
Wiretapped? Fucking brilliant. This is amazing shit that keeps getting funnier the more time goes on. Thanks, Trump!
Wednesday, May 2, 2018
Cocaine Mitch Is Probably Wicked Fucking Sick Of All The Winning Right Now
Jesus, when you get dragged by a vile pig-fucking murderer like Don Blankenship and just stand there and take it like a bitch with that simpy turtle smirk on your misshapen turtle head, well, you're fucking sick to death of all the winning going on. Nice job, McConnell. You're quite a guy. Thanks, Trump!
This Proud Beta Cuck Loser Boy Is The Proudest Proud Boy Who Ever Boyed
Watching a proud boy turn into a corn cob. It was pretty fun, tho. Especially the narration. Nobody's ever gonna be proud of that boy again.
Tuesday, May 1, 2018
Watching Hillary Clinton Dead-Enders Cob Themselves Is What Passes For Fun These Days
Philippe Reines turns cobbing into an art. It's obviously his only skill. The Clinton fucks hate Sanders so much because they know two things for sure: Hillary lost to the orange shitgibbon, and Bernie would have won easily.
Watching Twits Try To Figure Stuff Out Is Beyond Tedious
Thanks guys. Great job. Good thinking. Though one of those fellers has shown he's not a complete fucking zero, most of the twits are just fucking hopeless and always will be, so never, ever wonder how a clueless orange imbecile and least popular major party candidate in history managed to eke out an electoral victory against the second least popular candidate in modern American history. Brilliant.
Thank The Gods Nobody Gives A Shit About Ironman Triathlons
Nobody cares. Triathlons are very hard, especially at the longer distances. But nobody cares. Swimmers suck at triathlons because the swimming is so short. Great bike racers can destroy the field as long as they can swim even a little bit, see Overend, Ned. The running is mostly about monster fitness and not get injured. Bike racing is cool. Triathlons are shit, unless you get off on doing 'em. Knock yourself out. Thanks, Trump.
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