Saturday, May 23, 2015

Ireland Does The Right Thing

62.1% for the Ta side!  That's a feckin' landslide, and in Ireland, where the priests used to rule.  Ireland--IRELAND!!--leads the way.  That's not nothing, and good on those Mick fuckers for making the right call.  Raise a glass, boyo, and welcome to the wonderful world of marriage equality and to the equally wonderful world of gay divorce!

Pictures. Love the Gerry Adams.  Sinn Fein was on the right side of this issue.  As usual.

Good Start For The Sox Tonight

I hope the Angels do not regret not piling on in that top of the first.

Update: Fuckers.  A dark day for humankind.

Friday, May 22, 2015

Help America, Pray To The Minutemen

Is There Anything Dumber And More Offensive Than 'Help America Pray The Rosary'?

I guess you're saying, "I'm a gigantic asshole AND I'm a catholic!"  But jesus, why would you be so proud of being so gods-damned primitive?  What the fuck is a rosary, anyway, besides some cheap plastic beads on a nylon string in the hands of a sad and frightened animal?  How in the name of fuck is that crap going to help America?  What is going to help, exactly?  What the fuck is wrong with people?

Thursday, May 21, 2015

No Stephanie Birkitt On The Last Letterman Show

No pictures of Birkitt in the Foo Fighters' montage; no nothing.  Almost like she'd never been there.  Isn't that odd.  Most everything was on display, but not that.  I'd imagine Letterman's wife probably drew that line. 

No Tony "Inky" Mendez, either.

The Fucking Duggars Are Human Garbage

Jesus, this family is the scum of the fucking Earth.  And that sick fucker Josh Duggar was working for the even sicker motherfuckers at the Family Research Council.  That molester Duggar was doing some pretty disgusting research, but I'm sure the FRC scumbags were really into it.  Abusing children is probably the biggest requirement for working at the FRC.

Red Sox Doing The Gods' Work Tonight

And now Eck with that other fool and that Steve Lyons clown.  Eck is losing his shit.  This is the most entertaining tee vee in human history.

Big Stik

When Is This Bill O'Reilly Abuse Story Going To Break Into The Mainstream?

Blogs and whatnot are fine, just fine, but O'Reilly lost custody of his kids because he did something to his wife, and the evidence points to O'Reilly being guilty of the most disgusting domestic violence.  After the scandal of his lying and deception in reporting for decades, this new O'Reilly news should be everywhere.  When will the establishment media run with this?  Come on, you worthless fuckers. 

Wednesday, May 20, 2015

Bill O'Reilly Is A Bad Bad Man

Wife beater, the worst father in the world, proven liar, pervert, sexual harasser, keister falafel maven, brain-dead hypocrite.  What's left for this disgusting motherfucker?  Literal mother fucking?  He's the king of the tee vee teabaggers, but in real life, Bill O'Reilly is a sad and repulsive specimen. 

Remember When Michigan Was A Respectable School?

The U Chicago of Michigan? The Wesleyan of the Midwest? The Berkeley of public universities?  When you could excuse so much of the nonsense?  When you felt good about being associated with the university?  Well, those days are gone.  Have been for a while, but Jim Harbaugh is the final insult.  The Reaganites and teabaggers and worthless conservative Koch-suckers have destroyed public education; Harbaugh's merely an unsightly carbuncle on the cancer-ridden rectum of the American academy. 

Jesus, These Duggar Creeps Are Demented And Deranged

How much more odious can this motherfucking Duggar shit show be?  What's next?  Some sort of organized cannibalism or thousand-year program of child rape?  The Duggars and their ilk are the absolute worst people America has ever spawned.  We should be ashamed. 

Kraut Car Butthurt = No Comments

Some of the civilians took exception to the Kraut cars and the Kraut car guys vaporized the comments.  Funny?  Not really.  Sad?  Who cares?  Dead as doornail?  Who cares?

Tuesday, May 19, 2015

Vulgar Idiot Of The Day, Catholic Edition

It's not just the fundie protestant christians who are horribly ignorant, vile, and hateful.  The catholics, the ones who inculcated child rape as a key component of the standard benefits package for 2000 years, can be every bit as creepy and dangerous as the born-again fuckwads.  Luckily, we have the devil fighting on our side, and I'll bet on that made-up motherfucker over all the other made-up motherfuckers any day of the week.

Ah, Twin Peaks Is A Pathetic Tits Place, Like An Even Sadder Hooters

Nothing to do with David Lynch or good pie or anything.  Got it.  Tits, for losers.  That makes these motorcycle twits even more risible; it would have been so much more majestic to hang out at--and shoot up--an Applebee's.  Jesus, that's really sad.  What sort of greasy loser would be caught dead in a place like this let alone kill someone in one?  America is a horrible place.

This Is Pretty Good Shit From Gawker

No, not O'Reilly--that shit is genius and mandate from all mankind--but this rant against wasting water and plastic and money for the ubiquitous bottled water culture.  Sure, it's gonna take a thousand years of browbeating and bitching until most rock-headed dipshits from our species get the hint, but fuck, let's start now.  Good. 

Gleeful Fisking Of Jupiter Ascending

Monday, May 18, 2015

Liar, Cuckold, And Pervert Bill O'Reilly Losing Custody Of His Kids Is The Most Heartwarming Story Of The Millennium

This is exactly the sort of story that makes you gratified you were born on this Earth.  Bill O'Reilly is so many nasty things, including a sexually-harassing pervert who wants nothing more than someone to shove falafels up his keister, but knowing that he was soundly bludgeoned by the judicial system and lost custody of his children makes everything so much more hilarious.  O'Reilly is a thin-skinned bully, a proven liar, a self-deluded pervert, a complete fucking moron, and the sort of man whose wife leaves him for a virile police officer, and, now, he is not even a father because the court ruled he was a violent coward and domestic abuser, too.  Life is fucking grand!

John Bolton, Cowardly Clown

Bolton is exactly the sort of monstrous gaping pussy that would scare the shit out of Lindsey Graham.  Bolton, however, also hates America.  He hates America so much that after his career of evil and lies and destruction, he refuses to even attempt to entertain us on the funfetti that is the GOP clown car abortion campaign, 2016.  Fucker.

This Is Not A Silca Impero Pump

Well, I guess it is, technically.  But it's a fucking joke; the Impero was light, cheap, paintable, and easily replaced (if not custom painted for your Masi or DeRosa or Della Santa or Chris Kvale), not a valuable piece of lifestyle status symbol bullshit.  Fuckers.

Wait, Those Cracker Thugs In Waco Shot Up A CHAIN RESTAURANT?

What the fuck?  This rough tough biker bar was a fucking chain restaurant?  A Twin Peaks?  Jesus.  What's next, some pussy bikers shoot up a Chile's?  The 99 will be the new hangout for the Diablos?  Hell's Angels at Applebees?  America is fucking toast.  What kind of self respecting cracker thugs would ever be seen at a fucking shitty chain place?  Gods damn, the bikers and their fluffers should be hanging out at the Round Up or some shit.  Even our white criminal element is completely incompetent.  Fucking idiots.

ISIS's Black Flag Versus Black Flag

We should send in America's Black Flag.  Round up every member of Black Flag's history, and then send those dad-punk fuckers over wail on those ISIS pricks.  That would be entertaining.  And would probably make a pretty cool live album.