Thursday, October 30, 2014

Hillary Clinton's Ghastliness Is Unbound

Even when she gets something right, she fucks it all up by backpedaling out of cowardice and ignorance.

For the folks out there who aren't following the simple stuff:

Clinton was right: corporations DO NOT create jobs.  Jobs are created by consumer demand.  People who want to buy something instead of making it themselves--food, clothes, a car, tubular tires, whatever--or who want to pay someone to do something instead of doing it themselves--paint house, drive truck, make dinner, give blowjob--create all the fucking jobs ever.

As a corollary, THE GOVERNMENT ALSO CREATES JOBS by using the force of law to enforce rules and regulation which mandate the employment of people to comply with those rules.  Safety engineers, clerks to fill out forms in quadruplicate--plus some company will fulfill the demand for forms in quadruplicate!--whatever it is, government mandates also create demand which creates jobs.

That's it.  It's pretty simple.  The corporation or small business is almost completely fungible.  If you don't get your goods or services or blowjobs from one company, you'll get them from another if you want to pay for them, and it doesn't matter which one does the job.  They're all pretty much equally useful or useless depending on your opinion of the goods and/or services.

Clinton should have had the balls to push back against the establishment, if she had it in her.  Which she doesn't.

Big Gay iPhones Tell Me Ted Cruz Is Still A Fucking Dipshit

Gay iPhones should have bigger screens and smaller bezels, bigger batteries making the phones a bit thicker so the fucking camera doesn't erupt like a stubborn pimple from the back of the phone, and go back to the glass-and-metal retro-future aesthetic.  Otherwise, I don't give a fuck if my iPhone digs chicks or dudes.  That said, Ted Cruz is gods-damned dumber than a post about every single fucking thing in the world.  Texas.  It's like a really fucking retarded country. 

I'd Feel Better If The Maine Ebola Nurse Had A Really Cool Bike

Like a Moots ti hardtail or something like an EWR OWB with a rigid fork or maybe a vintage Indy Fab mountain bike she got in college.  Looks like the boyfriend has a Surly fatbike; he lives in Fort Kent, Maine, so it's not clear if he's hardcore all-season mountain biker or rural hipster d-bag.

The Giants Do Right By Gods And America In The End

Jesus charlie crist, gods, and other random jerk-offs, along with all decent-minded Americans, appreciate that the SF Giants did not allow a baseball organization associated with Rush Limbaugh and George Brett and his piles--and Rush Limbaugh's piles--to win this year.  Thanks a bunch.

Genius Barz

Jesus frakking crist.  Seriously, how can any adult humans in the USA in 2014 be this fucking stupid?

Wednesday, October 29, 2014

Roots N Roll


Erik Loomis Does The Gods Work

By signal boosting these amazing take-downs of the worst band in America.  Jesus charlie crist, that was fucking heaps of fun.  I concede that making fun of a talentless, sickly pale country pop band is easy pickens, but it sure tastes yummy.  Loomis gets a complimentary cupcake for his good work today.

Wonderfully Brutal Red Cross Fisking

Fuck...that was...incredible.  The Red Cross is another of those organizations--Komen, United Way, Sally Army--you should know deep down are just awful, but until you see the glory of the truth revealed maybe you lied to yourself and thought they were okay.  The Red Cross has always done one thing exceptionally well, namely, enriching their executives.  They raise money they don't need and don't know how to use so they can pay obscene salaries and keep ginormous hookers-and-blow petty cash on hand.  After all, the organization hired Elizabeth Dole to be their "leader", and there is not a more nauseating Republican on gods' green earth than Elizabeth Dole.

Kudos to Elliot, Eisinger, and Sullivan for their great work.  Not that it will matter, since the Red Cross is beyond shame and most Americans are fucking morons.

(via)

Tuesday, October 28, 2014

Virag's Movie Reviews: X-Men: Days Of Future Past

This was not exactly a bad flick, but it was a terrible one.  It made no sense, wasted some surprisingly decent actors, and was not nearly engaging enough considering the interminable length of the thing.  X-Men: Days of Future Past was a fave of the easy-to-please nerds and dweebs and geeks, but incoherence is not skillful film making in any universe.  I think we have the absolute proof that Bryan Singer is every bit as over rated and hacktacular as Christopher Nolan.

Glenn Beck, Donald Trump, And Paul Ryan On With Hannity

Holy fucking shit, that is four of the dumbest motherfuckers on the planet on one Fox "News" show.  Jesus.

Jonas Salk Knows Anti-Vaxxers Are Frakking Morons

Evil, dangerous morons.  Except for the oldsters who lived through it, nobody alive now remembers the horror of poliomyelitis and iron lungs and crippled and dead children by the thousands every fucking year until Jonas Salk pioneered research into killed virus vaccines and developed a safe and effective polio vaccine in 1955.  These anti-vaccine monsters are undoing the work of scientists and doctors for a 100 gods-damned years.  There's no excuse for this sort of superstitious ignorance in the 21st century.  Let's pray to jesus charlie crist and the rest of the imaginary gods that some genius comes up with a vaccine for hopeless fucktardery.

Where's Meyer Wolfsheim? The Fix Is In

The Giants have been bought off.  It's the only possibility.  After taking Peavy out because his first baseman fucked up a play, Bruce Boche essentially gave the game away, or at least did his best to.  The Series as well.  Fucking genius. 

Fuck You Don Surber, Fuck You West Virginia

IT'S THE LIBERAL MEDIA!!  If you're a brainless dickwad.  Otherwise the liberal media is a clever fiction dreamed up by the syphilitic paranoids nuzzling Nixon's crusty ballsack in the 70s.  This vile bastard Surber is the one and only columnist in that shitty paper in Charleston, so that pretty much means that Daily Mail in Charleston, West Virgina was perfectly content to have an ignorant racist asshole like Don Surber be their standard bearer. 

Monday, October 27, 2014

Lee Wall'd Off


Ebola IS A Left-Wing Plot! I TOLD You!

I TOLD YOU!!  LIBERAL!  LEFT-WING!  DEMOCRAT! 

They want to kill us all, all us good white christians.  They're gonna take the ebola and kill us because Obama told 'em to!  We're doomed!  Only jesus can help us now!  Please jesus charlie crist, save us!

I Don't Care About The Season Arc

On Doctor Who.  It is always dumb and always a let-down.  This is a goofy kid's show about a magic phone booth and a silly little man who lives in it.  That's it.  They are not fucking Justified or even Battlestar Galactica.  If these idiots stopped worrying about the big picture and concentrated on entertaining episodes, the world would be a better place, and ebola would die off never to bother good white christians ever again.

I Heartily Endorse The Krauts Importing More Worthless Stupid Assholes Like This One

Some dumb fucker from the U.S. is over in Germany, bringing down the aggregate IQ for our Kraut friends.  Fuck Yeah!  What's funny--or fucking disgusting, depending on your personal perspective--is that these legions of not-nearly-bright-enough-asswhipes with embarrassing credentials from shitty schools are making it their lives' missions to criticize some shit they can never properly comprehend in order to bolster the vile reactionary political and economic positions of some of the most short-sighted and most ignorant plutocrats in the history of the known universe.  Why would these fools do this?  I guess because they're fucking retards.  They can't understand basic scientific concepts on the one hand, and on the other they mistakenly believe they are valuable comrades of the oligarch cohort.  That makes them so much worse than the mundane useful idiots we see every day. 

Hopelessly Stupid And Useless Bagger Of The Day

Blatant morons like this scabrous fuckknob are filling America to the brim with ignorance and hatred.  People like this asshole are the dipshit majority; they are too stupid to live but too simple to die.  Now that we are coming to election season, we will see the holocaust they reap as the teabaggers and Koch-suckers line up in government to retard progress for another coupla years.  Their beliefs, their lives, their minds are pathetic cosmic jokes, but there they are, fucking up the world for the rest of us. 

Sunday, October 26, 2014

Sun High


On The Other Hand, The Jets!

Oh boy, the Jets are a blessing to all good, gods-fearing Americans.  It's almost too great to watch them be as mesmerizingly ineffectual as they are.  We are beloved by many kindly and loving gods to have the Jets suck balls for our amusement.

The SF Giants Will Probably Let Us Down

Good deal last night, but it still feels like those SF fuckers will frak it up in the end.

Saturday, October 25, 2014

Black Kvale

Repaint by Kvale as well.  Is that black?  I guess it's black.  None more black.



Gods Blessed America: School Shootings Are Not Even Really News Anymore

Fuck yeah!  I love a country where some fuckface shooting up a school is only another bullshit story in the background of societal disintegration.  We care a lot about tons of inane nonsense, but when we have an actual violent crisis staring us in the face, we're too fucking stupid to notice.  Genius.

Political Song for Kevin Vickers to Sing


There's Nothing In Canada Worth Shooting

No reason to shoot anyone or anything in Canada, unless it is your dinner.  Very sad.

Jack Bruce, Those Guys Are Getting Old!

Jack Bruce is dead at 71.  Goodness gracious, these fellows are getting old!  It is sort of amazing that Bruce died before either Clapton or Baker.  And Bruce was the creative force of Cream, for what that's worth damn near 50 years later.

Friday, October 24, 2014