Thursday, September 18, 2014

Digby Hearts Huckabee

I, for one, pray to jesus charlie crist that Mike Huckabee runs and runs hard for president.  Digby's right that Huckabee is a nasty motherfucker, and that will make him so very entertaining on the campaign trail.  I want that greasy fat fuck to be the poster child for Republican inanity, and only a little because he doesn't stand a chance of being elected to anything in 2016.  Like a storm of southern Santorum, Huckabee might turn out to be the light of our lives.  A smarmy, southern-preacher dipshit, lovingly fluffing Ted Nugent's diseased, warty cock, a teabagging fucktard Fox "News" gasbag embarrassing himself all over the country for the next two years is just what American needs right fucking now.

Does Huckabee even know what "Cat Scratch Fever" is about?

ISIS And Saudi Arabia

From Patrick Cockburn.  So, if anyone out there is surprised that most of the problems in the Middle East not directly caused by the United States and Israel are caused by Saudi money and Saudi interests, well, you're a fucking moron.  The Saudis are happy to have the instability on the region benefit them; in no way are they willing to fight against ISIS without being forced to.  This is yet another reason why we should not engage at any level with ISIS.  Let the Saudis spend their money and their blood to fight the people they were supporting while we sit back and laugh and laugh and laugh. 

Wednesday, September 17, 2014

Virag's Movie Reviews: Guardians Of The Galaxy (2014)

This flick was another of those situations, like The Avengers, where the likelihood of complete disaster is so high that something decent is a wonderful shock.  GotG was not as tightly constructed as Joss Whedon's ensemble movie, but worked pretty okay, considering.  The whole enterprise was a bit overly light and fluffy, but there were some entertaining bits, and it went by quickly and painlessly.  Boring would have been torture in something this dumb, but this movie wasn't boring.  The biggest weakness to the entire flick was the execrable mixed tape motif used with anachronistic Walkman gag.  It was supposed to be 1988 for fuck's sake!  What if Peter Quill's mother had had good taste in music instead of the easy-listening garbage filling the movie?  James Gunn should probably never forgiven for the awful music content in the film.  1988.  So Good It Hurts was out.  The Clash.  DKs.  Minutemen.  Huskers.  The Smiths.  Bad Religion.  So much great West Coast punk.  Social D.  Flipper.  East Coast post-punk.  Sonic Youth.  Pixies.  British punk, post punk and new wave.  Jesus, this movie could have been genius with great music.  James Gunn's failure of imagination probably worked against the flick in a million little ways, but the music is the glaring defect.

Also, the trailer for Interstellar looked horrid.  How dumb is that movie going to be?  Traveling to another solar system is powered by love...yeah...great.  Christopher Nolan is rewriting the definition of overrated one clumsy, inane movie at a time.

Jesus It's Not That Hard To Figure Out This ISIS Shit

Nothing is not such a terrible idea when any something is a complete clusterfuck.  The key is the USA should do nothing.  ISIS is not our problem; they are no danger to the United States.  Since the horror show they have going on over there right now IS the fault of the USA, we can't do anything fix it.  Nor should we.  It would only make it worse and extend the time it will take to purge the fundamentalist rejects from the region.  We broke Middle East when we destabilized the region over and over by destroying functional governments, but fuck them.  ISIS are a problem now, but they are a problem for the Saudis, the Israelis, the Jordanians, and the Iranians, and it is time for the them to clean up our mess for once.  The governments of the regional powers like Saudi Arabia, Israel, Jordan, and Iran are in danger from ISIS, so this is their war.  The key word is region.  ISIS ain't shit around here.

Since we as the USA can't intervene directly, we will undoubtedly feel the moral obligation to advise the governments and profiteer wildly.  No soldiers, though.  And an end to the bombing.  Saudi Arabia has planes.  Israel has attack helicopters.  Iran has friends in Russia who sell weapons and like money.  Time for those folks to grow up and fight their own fucking wars. 

Fisking Dems Over Obamacare

Easy, but necessary.  This health care thing was a big fuck up, but the Dems owned it, so they should have been campaigning on the benefits, real or imagined, from the start, because the Republicans were going to shit all over it no matter what, even if they overplayed it badly.  The Dems needed guts and a national strategy to make it pay off; they had none, and now even some success in Kentucky can't help them.  Nice goin', kids.

Bring On The BlackNRA

A BlackNRA smarter, wiser, and just better than these paranoid guntard morons.  But still, the point is there; if a blah person has the guns, the racist asshole NRA people will not be able to stand it.  This is the path to a gun-free America.  Let's get the blahs the guns and watch the gun control laws rain down like the grace of a billion fictional gods.

Monday, September 15, 2014

Chris Carter: Good Man

Chris Carter is a stand-up guy.  Good for him.  Ditka, on the other hand, is a irredeemable fuckstick.  Keyshawn is also a worthless cocksucker.  Fuck them.  But Carter is okay.  He's got guts and brains enough to speak up for the defenceless. 

ISIS And Texas Are Exactly The Same

ISIS fuckwits would fit right in in Texas.  Or Alabama.  Or Utah.  Or Florida.  Or Brooklyn.  Or maybe we could round up our religious fundamentalist assholes with our numerous black helicopters and send them over to live with their barbarian cousins in ISIS.  That would be best for everyone, and I personally would wish them well.

Don't Go To Texas Cuz It's A Dipshit Paradise

Rampant imbecilic fucktardery is what Texas is all about.  And that's about it.  Anything you gotta do in Texas, you can do in New Mexico or Oklahoma or some other fucking place down there.  But stay the fuck outa Texas just on principle. 

While We Wait For The World's First Preteen Girl Morphine Tribute Band

Are The Fluffer Types Doin' This Shit On Purpose?

Why, yes they are. Thanks for noticing!  I mean, I get it.  Welfare Academia are the fluffiest of Obama fluffers, the most stalwart water carriers of The Establishment, dun, Dun, DUN, mostly because acceptance by said establishment is their most desired state of grace and the entire purpose of their lives.  Chait's merely a dipshit, so no more about him.  Lemieux does this all the time, though; he pretends to be such a cool, rational skeptic when he is doing nothing but providing the basest rationalization of the status quo.  "Shit's always been this way and so we's doin' a pretty good job and our guy's good and shit" seems to be the extent of his analysis after you sweep away all the bullshit.  One of his confederate apparatchiks gives the grift away, though.  The Democratic Party was not always liberal.  No shit.  BUT THAT'S THE FUCKING POINT FRANK WAS MAKING!  If you are the lesser of the conservative parties, you will never make any inroads with people who support philosophies and policies which might not be so very far right.  As far right as the modern Democratic party.  As far right as the historical Democratic party.  Lemieux understands this and is doing everything he can to be an enthusiastic cheerleader for his intramural politics team; either that or he's a fucking moron.  Frank's mistake was working his argument in the context of the Democrats V. Republicans (sic) instead of abandoning the premise of a possibly vaguely not-quite-so-obviously-right-of-center Democratic party.  Scott Lemieux narrows his personal viewpoint so drastically that he's either a sad, smarmy pissboy or a George W. Bush-level imbecile.  I guess that's the point, but it is still annoying after all this time.  The rock-ribbed political system we enjoy needs legions of barely useful idiots to bulwark the ship of state against the vast majority of the ignorant population, but I sometimes long for a fluffer cadre who are not quite so enthusiastic about their ignoble function.

Sunday, September 14, 2014

Saturday, September 13, 2014

Gone Gone Gone

Alex Chilton Placemat

Thir Teen

Virag's Movie Reviews: Dredd (2012)

Dredd wasn't exactly inspired film making, but it wasn't really bad, either.  Karl Urban?  Better than Stallone.  Olivia Thirlby?  A luminous actor who might be really good if she gets the roles (and waayyy better than Ellen Page for fuck's sake).  The rest?  It was short, simplistic, a very mild R, but considering how low the expectations were, not such a fucking abortion.  That's somethin'.

Why Aren't Saudi Arabia And Israel Fighting ISIS And Sterling Archer?

The vile cowards in Saudi Arabia and Israel have some of the biggest, most modern military infrastructures on the planet, so why don't we let them take out the trash in their own neighborhood and crush the cretinous primitives who call themselves ISIS?  ISIS is not at all a threat to the USA; they can't do anything to harm us, but they are pissing in the punchbowl over there.  Not our problem.  Decrapitating a coupla news boys is not an act of war.  It's time for the Saudis and the Israelis to stand up for themselves.  When ISIS can be at least as annoying as a parking ticket anywhere in the lower 48, then we should consider squashing them.  Until then, let our vassal states in the Middle East do the heavy lifting for once.

Virag's Movie Reviews: Red Dawn (2012)

You can't make a flick called Red Dawn without the lunacy of addle-headed reactionary fuckwit creep John Milius.  You can't.  And you shouldn't.  While this new thing certainly made as little sense as the first one, and was every bit as unintentionally hilarious, it lacked the verve of a true fascist Reaganite moron at the helm.  Without Milius, all you have left is the mundane stupid.  And that's no fun, especially at PG-13.

Deepak Chopra Is A Profoundly Stupid And Nasty Person

Indeed, there are bigger asswhipes messing up our planet, and even more qualified candidates for Biggest Douche in the Universe, but Chopra is a particularly disgusting specimen.  Besides being unctuous and creepy, he's also as dumb as a fucking post.  He doesn't comprehend enough basic science to get a passing grade in the average elementary school.  Not that it has stopped him from building a fortress of horseshit at which fuckloads of idiots are happy to leave money. 

Adrian Peterson Is A Fucking Prince

How many kids does this piece of shit have, and does he abuse all of them?  I guess if you are Adrian Peterson's kid, never meet him in person, and somehow live to adulthood, you consider yourself blessed.  This really is the opening of Idiocracy playing out in real time.

Friday, September 12, 2014

Sarah Palin In White Riot

Where's the fucking video?  That would be the real fappening.  And where was the Alaskan Officer Darren Wilson to shoot these white-trash scumbags dead in the street like mangy dogs?  THAT woulda' been a great day for Murka!

Racist Asshattery Is America

All-American.  And these are mainstream Republicans.  The baggers and racist cocksuckers are the center of the party now.  They were always there, but the GOP never listened to them much before, only used them for votes and enthusiasm and took their money because those scumbags were so nasty they were practically begging to be abused.  Now those creepy motherfuckers are the heart and soul of the party.  It took a shitty black president to finally destroy whatever useless threadbare sanity the Republican party had left in the 21st century.  Now we have these fuckers and their toothless minions in control of one our major conservative national political parties.

Depresssing Climate Science

Depressing in the sense that if you see the disconnect with and misunderstanding of basic politics by the geeks, dweebs, and cosplay nerds, even the ones with honorable intentions, you get really fucking forlorn over the state of our political economy.  Some people are easily manipulated because they're fucking morons.  Some because they are nasty, small-minded creeps.  Some because they're ignorant.  That's not good.  We can't help the dumb as a post fellers or the teabagging racist assholes, but the just plain clueless...

Do You Feel Let Down By Roger Goodell?

(Hah, hah, Dan Shaughnessy.)  Anyway, Goodell may now be on the way out, but anyone who is shocked that Goodell has been exposed as equal parts comically incompetent and astoundingly appalling should seriously consider the benefits of a suicide booth.  Goodell is the incontinent lapdog of that most select group of some of our most disgusting oligarchs, the NFL ownership.  He's not there cuz he's smart or decent or a leader; he's there because up until recently when he forgot himself and took a giant nasty dump on the chesterfield, it was in a middle-class living room. 

Rob Ford Gods Dammit

Now it's up to the brother.  We're counting on the brother of this fucking shit show to smoke crack and eat out sluts and talk shit and generally be a teabagging posterboy?  This is how we are expected to be entertained?  Gods fucking dammit.  That piece of shit brother has some fucking work to do!

Ray Rice Has A Bunch Of Idiot Friends

Duuhhh...I guess we can't fault a certain percentage of the population for being irredeemable fuckwads--27%--so more than a few Ravens fans are gonna be just awful people.  Still, jesus charlie crist, people suck.