Wednesday, January 31, 2018

Moore Machine


Reminder That Obama And The Deep State Attacked The GOP Choo-Choo

Michelle Obama and Hillary Clinton staged a kamikaze attack on the brightest lights of the Republican Party!  It's a WAARRR!!!!!!

Screaming Reactionary Assholes Are The Heart And Soul Of The GOP

Rock-ribbed Republicans are the most horrible people who ever lived.

Poor Senile Trump Couldn't Help Clapping Like A Retarded Trained Seal

That fucking hopeless dimwit was probably just trying to make the Kennedy kid look good.  Trump is a seriously deranged asshole, and the mental-defective shitstains in his base are somehow even worse.

Microencephalitic Circus Geek Trey Gowdy Is Sick To Motherfucking Death Of All The Winning!

That scary-looking Deliverance-reject fucktard is just so sick of winning he's not gonna run anymore.  Maybe the GOP can dig up Beetlejuice to run instead and hold the seat for the bad guys.  Trump's made everything so winny that the only thing these Republicans can do is lose!  Fucking genius.  Thanks, Trump.

No Matter How Drooly, Joe Kennedy 3 Cannot Be As Stupid As His Father

If the kid was as dumb as the father, the pair would undoubtedly implode the universe with inanity. 

Sunday, January 28, 2018

The President Yo La Tengo / New Wave Hot Dogs CD Is The Pinnacle Of Human Artistic Expression

Ulysses and Finnegans Wake can suck eggs.

Spherical Planets Are Satanic!

Jesus loves a flat Earth!  SAAAATANNNNNNNNN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


The Loathsome Boarding School Twits Are Every Bit The Teabagging Cocksuckers

Pro tip: If your boarding school has a robust conservative community listening to the likes of Ben Shapiro, you are titanic asshole for spending 60 fucking grand a year on that shithole.

Reality and sanity have a distinct liberal bias, so the conservative parents and students listening to and agreeing with bottom-of-the-barrel fatuous asswipes like Shapiro and Andrew Wilkow should be taken out into the street and horsewhipped.  Imagine being so fucking deluded and racist that you felt bad for a whiny little bitch like Ben Shapiro.  The only proper treatment UConn could have shown the virgin Ben would have been a mouldering bucket of year-old moose piss poured over his head continuously for a month.  These overprivileged, mental-defective reactionary shitheads like that photocunt are the very worst things about elite boarding schools and America in general.

Sr. Atrios Unloads An Impromptu Fisking All Over Fareed Zakaria

No doubt that skeevy, racist, neoliberal cocksucker Zakaria can't even spell fusillade.  Anyway, some intrepid young scholar should do Yale a solid and come up with a list of marks for that august institution that aren't black marks.

Will be a short list.

Tailz


Jesus Frakking Christ, The Twits Should Shut The Fuck Up

Disgusting idiots don't have anything useful to add, especially that OP cocksucker.  Twits don't get nothing, and need to be quiet while the decent folks deal with shit.

Federer Again

Roger Federer, pretty fucking impressive.  Regardless of anything else, the man is a great player and knows how to pull off a winning game at his age.

Tails


Saturday, January 27, 2018

Melania Trump, Sick Of Winning? Sick Of Sluts And STDs? Fuck, Yeah!

Melania is sick of winning. Even more than she was sick of Trump's tiny impotent weiner when she was trying to get knocked up.  Melania knows Trump fucks gutter trash and that he only found two of the most fucking odd-looking desperate tramps to marry him before her.  She's gotta hate that she's the last used up slattern to decide that Trump was better than whatever other shit life she was staring at in some threadbare eastern European hellhole.

Veggie Tails


Wednesday, January 24, 2018

Lew


The Federalist: Delivering Crazed And Incoherent Hate Speech Plagiarized From The Walls Of The Most Putrid Outhouses In Alabama

Incompetent hate-filled rantings of a mental-defective plagiarist? The Federalist!  Ben Domenech-McCain sends his illiterate catamites out to copy anything scrawled on a shithouse wall within 500 miles of every Klan meeting and Trump rally to bring you only the finest teabagging nonsense. 

There's No Dumber Asswipe Than Charlie Daniels

That stupid old racist bastard makes the average Trumptard look like a real fucking idiot, too.  I used to think Daniels was just playing up the teabagging shitheaddedness in order to bolster his retirement income from the lesser state fair circuit, but now there's now way that reactionary old cocksucker is not a 100 perfuckingcent true believing asshole.

Whax


Tuesday, January 23, 2018

Upper-Class Twits: All The Self-Delusion And Smarmy Ignorance You Can Fit In A Can

Fucking vile cunts, the lot of them.  There's something about money that makes idiots into yuge fucking screaming idiots.  Not a single one of those sick fucks knows a gods-damned thing, but they are all sitting around wallowing in their over-privileged inanity and sucking each other's dicks with big dumb smiles on their misshapen faces.  Disgusting.  Thanks, Trump.

Getta Head


Monday, January 22, 2018

Don't Ever Vote For Dems, Chuckles Schumer Edition

Not a dime's worth of difference between the parties on just about anything important.  Who said that?  Well, nobody knows who said that but every single fucking day the Dems prove it to anyone paying attention.  Funny how the most vile racist inbred conservative teabagging GOP fucktards in America get oodles of Republican candidates to vote for who are just as horrible and nasty as they are, but somehow the opposition party basically supports the same positions that the racist revanchist teabagger Republicans support.  Weird.  Don't ever vote for any candidate in any race who doesn't represent an overwhelming majority of the ideas you care about.  Ever.

Remember Deep State Libtard Faggots, Capricorn One Was A Documentary

Why do you think they framed O.J.??!!  Capricorn One was the unmasking of the deep state faggottry that Barack Obama brought from Kenya to the bathhouses of Chicago.  Thank jesus that Trump will finally tell us the truth about the fake Mars landing!

Iggles? Yeah, I Guess

Can't go with the vile Patsies, so Philadelphia gets it by default.  Go team.  Yay America.

Sunday, January 21, 2018

Xpress Van


Senator Tammy Duckworth Viciously Exposes Trump As The Saddest Beta Cuck Coward In America

If Duckworth could have seen Trump's microscopic nutsack, she woulda sliced that shit off, too.  "Cadet Bone Spurs reporting for duty in the Beta Squad of Cuck Platoon!"  Or probably not reporting, since Trump is a yuge pussy.

Gloriously Beautiful Drive-By Fisking Of The Wretched Winston Churchill

Well-done, Paddy.  Churchill is one of those assholes of history that idiots idolize because they're fucking utter reactionary morons and don't even know it.  But Churchill was a loathsome fascist monster and all-around vile creep, and everyone would have been better off if the Krauts had roasted him on a spit like the disgusting pig he was.

The Heinous Patriots Are A Scourge On Humanity

Those hateful fuckers are a wasting disease in the bowels of our beautiful American exceptionalism.  It's easy to prove that there's no god when you see this shit happening.

Saturday, January 20, 2018

Political Song for Trump to Sing


The Best We Can Hope For Is That North And South Korea Solve Their Own Shit Peacefully

And humiliate the Trump administration in the process.  Olympics and beyond, if the Koreans can make this shit better without some idiot shooting the place up, we should all light a fucking candle.  If they can do that and make Trump look like a bumbling stooge, that's just a fucking bonus!

Donald Trump: Masturbator Negotiator And Sooper Genius

The man who never made a profitable business deal in his life because he inherited a fortune and proceeded to shrink it year by year through a lifetime of failure could not successfully negotiate a cupcake at a bakery.  The political establishment in DC is shredding Trump on a daily basis, and all his neo-Nazi staff can do is try to keep him from getting played by anyone and everyone.  It's a lovely thing to watch and beautiful, exceptional funfetti.  Thanks, Trump!

Trump Will Fuck Anything, Even Nikki Haley

That fucking loser has zero standards.  At least when people thought it was Hope Hicks it meant he was possibly sticking his tiny ancient pecker in some young stuff, but Haley is a fucking train wreck.  Jesus.  Fucking heinous.  At least this gives Ivanka a bit of rest sometimes, I guess.  Thanks, Trump.

Friday, January 19, 2018

Never Done


Miss Lindsey Graham And Little Tom Cotton Get Into A Bitch Fight

Oh my! Girls, please!  It's such a shock to see two such cultured southern belles get all hissy and fight like that.  Where are your manners, ladies?  Thanks, Trump!

Imani Gandy: Always And Forever The Biggest Idiot In Any Room And The World's Worst Lawyer

Braying imbeciles make 1000% more sense than that angry black dipshit on her best day.  Too bad these fucking shitbags ruined America by backing the worst candidate in human history and the only fucking loser big enough to actually lose to Donald Trump.

With Or Without


What Does Diaper Pervert David Vitter Know About Trump's Spankings?

What did Vitter know and when did he spank it?  Trump's porn sluts and Russian piss hookers will be his undoing.  If there's a god who loves us like jesus so fucking much.

BOTH PARTIES DO IT! AP's Laurie Kellman Is Both An Idiot AND An Asshole

BOTH SIDES!

THE PARTY THAT CONTROLS EVERY BRANCH OF THE GOVERNMENT SHARES THE BLAME WITH THE PARTY THAT HAS ABSOLUTELY NO POWER!!

The AP's Laurie Kellman is a special kind of rock-ribbed conservative establishment media fuckhead. 

Tuesday, January 16, 2018

Nothing But Love Songs For Victoria


Should You Be Happy When You Meet The Dumbest Asshole In America? Is It Fun To Laugh At Someone So Pathetic?

Like this good-lookin' fella? Or are you sad, because you have seen just how vile and ignorant some Americans can be?  Maybe the best thing is to just walk away and leave the pathetic fuckstain to wallow in their own wretched filth.

Reminder That Flat Earth Buffoons Are Jeebus-Fluffing GOP Stalwarts

Flat-Earth nimrods are just the sort of creepy racist assholes who love jesus and the Republican Party.  Fundie idiots are fundie idiots are fundie idiots wherever you find 'em.

Days Daze


Emily Zanotti Is Your Daily Reminder That Libertarians Are Bigger Fuckwits Than Trumptards

Emily Zanotti starring in 'What You Look Like When You R 2 Stupid 4 The GOP'.  Not the years most critically-acclaimed extravaganza or anything.  Being a Republican requires shitloads of ignorance and hatred, but at least those rock-ribbed conservative teabagging cocksuckers can always say 'But at least we're not dumb enough to be libertarians!'

Beautiful, Exceptional Joy Reid Drive-By Auto-Fisking

Dammm, that girl ain't too smart.  You really gotta think if MLK was to suddenly show up and watch Joy Reid for like 10 seconds, he'd see exactly what is up, and he would not exactly be a fan.

Monday, January 15, 2018

The Rising Of The Moon


Losing A Battle But Winning History

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.

19 Sixteen

Where Did Dick Durbin Find That Ball

Durbin, a Dem, not backing down to a Republican! What the foock?  Where did Durbin find that testicle?  And how does he know what he's supposed to do with it?  It's a fucking shock, I say!

MLK The Way The Racist Assholes Hate Him Most

Heh, indeedy.  Brother Martin was not quite the anodyne caricature the establishment douchebags would prefer. 

MLK Day And The Vile Racist GOP Still Hates It

Besides honoring Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr., this day is also wonderful for driving the horrible racist teabagging Republicans absolutely fucking bonkers.  Thanks, Trump.

Dreams...


Delores O'Riordan Too Young At 46

I went to the Cranberries with Toad the Wet Sprocket concert many moons ago because I knew someone who was a (the?) huge TTWS fan, and who was I to say no.  We saw Delores O'Riordan, and oh my she was so small and so pretty and had such a huge voice.  46 is way to fucking young.

Sunday, January 14, 2018

Swedish Immeegrints


Well, Better The Vikings Than New Orleans

That Drew Brees is a creepy fucker, jesus fluffer, and all-round dickhead.  Good job Vikings.

Chelsea Manning Would Be A Billion Times Better Senator Than Rand Paul

Or most of the rest of 'em.  Manning could champion the underrepresented not-a-complete-piece-of-human-garbage constituency.  Fuck, at least we're sure she knows right from wrong!

Rand Paul: Simpleton Son Of Notorious Racist Asshole Ron Paul And Senator From One Of America's Premier Shitholes Says Trump Isn't Racist

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.

Years O Exile


The Steelers Won't Be Losing To The Patsies Again This Year

Oops.  What happens when you focus on your next game instead of today's game?  I don't know.  Let's ask Pittsburgh.  Stupid fuckers.

Not Breaking News: Trump Hotels Are Shitholes

The market has spoken!  Now all the world will know the truth about anything with the Trump name on it.  Sad.  Thanks, Trump!


Jesus Frakking Christ, The Falcons Are Dog Shit

The Falcons are fucking useless.  They're the Democratic Party of NFL teams. 

The Boarding School Twits Melt Down

It's sad to think that any of those assholes actually believe elite boarding schools or the shitty NYC private day schools like Trinity are things other credentialing clubs for the ruling class.  The reasons why those Manhattan day schools have so many kids at Yale and Harvard is because their parents and grandparents went to Yale and Harvard, and they all come from the richest, most-connected families in the United States.  The kids are mostly dumb as rocks.  As were the parents.  And the kids at Exeter and Andover.  The elite boarding schools attract some smart kids, many of them on financial aid, but the usual Exeter student is just a much a dullard as the usual Harvard student.  Hi there, Jared Kushner!

Friday, January 12, 2018

Peeled Sweater


Trump Probably Paid The Porn Star Not To Laugh

She musta threatened to laugh at his tiny, broken weener in public on the tee vee unless he paid her bigly money. Sad!  If Trump had a man's functional genitalia, he could have saved himself the dough.  No wonder he got divorced so many times.

Missouri Governor Eric 'Slappy' Greitens Is A Beautiful Republican

Missouri is the Show-Me-How-to-Slap-a-Ho state, and Eric Greitens is the motherfucking king of the scumbags.  Greitens is an exceptional Republican patriot who knows how blackmail sluts into keeping their fucking whore traps shut unless they want to be smacked again.  Thanks, Trump!

PZ 'Party Zone' Myers Is Fuckin' Right: White American Christians Are Fucking Horrible

Nothing worse than a white American christian: racist Nazi fuckbags with faulty brains and bad hygiene.  They're the fucking scum of the Earth, and they are rock-ribbed conservative GOP cocksuckers, every last one of 'em.

The Half-Pint Economist Calls Trump A Fucking Moron

Robert Reich has it figured out.  Durbin, Reich are pointing the way to destroy Trump.  Will the Dems be up to the task?  What do you think?

Dick Durbin Calls Trump A Liar

Bout fucking time. Welcome to the party, pal.  Durbin and every other Dem should be right up front with this shit and shout if from the fucking rooftops: Trump is a liar.  LIAR!  Now is not the time to be pussies, Dems.

Hill King


So, The Rocket Scientists At CNN Put On Nazi Asshole And Noted Pinhead Stephen Miller

And it turns out he's a nasty, babbling, cocksucking liar! Who fucking knew?  Usually when you have neo-Nazis and revanchist racist lunatics on your tee vee, it is all fucking beautiful and fun.  It hardly ever sucks major dog dick or anything!

Choosy Mother


Thursday, January 11, 2018

Also Not Breaking News: Trump Was Always A Mental-Defective Liar

Trump's not only the king of the teabaggers, he's way fucking stupider than most any dipshit fuckface asshole out there teabagistan.  Trump was nothing other than a small-time goof, taking a decent fortune inherited from his father and slowly losing it through his own clumsy incompetence, along with being a total lying scumbag vulgarian.  This is not news to anyone with an IQ in double digits.  So no Republicans are aware of any of it.

Remember, This Flat Earth Inanity Started As A Troll, But The Teabaggers And Other Conservative Shitheads Were Dumb Enough To Fall For It

SATAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


NOT BREAKING NEWS: Trump Is A Racist Cocksucker And A Teabagging Fuckwit!

No, really.  Trump is a racist piece of shit.  He's the king of the ignorant fucktards, also known as the Republican Party.  This should not be a shock to anyone, even CNN.

Ta-Nehisi Coates Is An Airhead And A Pissboy, But The Gossip Kids Don't Know Any Better

Don't waste you time with a vacuous fraud like Ta-Nehisi Coates, gossip kids!  The poor gossip kids don't know any better.  Coates is a useless establishment suckup just as bad as Ezra Klein, Katie Roiphe, or Cokie Roberts.  Sad, gossip kids.  Sad.

The Federalist: Always Another Malodorous Lunatic Screaming For Jesus

Ben Domenech is a filthy plagiarist, and Abby Johnson is a fetid teabagging cunt.  They are exactly like every other conservative.  Nice job, America.

Monday, January 8, 2018

Loveable Drive-By Fisking Of The Heinous Oprah Winfrey

Fun!  America's got a shitload of problems, and one the biggest has always been Oprah Winfrey.  She's the cancer eating away at America's dirty, dirty asshole.

Twit Funfetti Jamboree

Very busy January for the twits.  Not sure anyone gives a flying fuck, tho.  Zathras knows better than Ben Serotta, and brave new world of bikes in general is looking pretty grim for every price point.  Regardless, these fucking Serotta things are pretty heinous and waayyy too pricey for what you get. 

Sunday, January 7, 2018

22 Years Ago--Timeflies



The Last Capaldi Series Of Doctor Who Was Not Great

Watched it all again at once, and while it wasn't bad, it was tired.  So very tired.  Capadi was good, fine, but the rest of the endeavor seemed disinterested and uninteresting.  I like John Simm as The Master, but he was wasted in the last episode.  Not sure why it had to be like that; maybe Capaldi was already checked out and everybody knew so they were phoning it in.

The Bills Versus The Jaguars Is America 2018

Welcome to our exceptional American reality.  Just don't believe it won't get any worse...

American Classic Finally Finished

American Taiwanese Classic compenents is finally kapoot, I guess.  I'm not sure how classic anything was after they became mostly overseas-made, but I'm kinda shocked that Bill Shook was still the owner.  According to the twits, he was hustling and bustling in the biz all along.  The stuff was made by so many vendors over the years.  That musta been a nightmare to deal with.  Sorta amazing the brand name persisted since 1980fucking2.  So much for those original seatposts in the Branford Bike catalog.

Saturday, January 6, 2018

Wingz


Life With Sram--Snappy!

Always an adventure.  Even though Campag and Shimano now outsource much of their shit, at one time those companies actually made their own shit.  And made it well.  Quality shit.  The factory was right there with the executive offices and design folks.  They made it, so at least they know what it should be like.  I'm not sure Sram was ever the actual manufacturer of anything.  They were outsource/acquisition from the start.  It's all cheap junk to them cuz that's all they've ever known.

Thursday, January 4, 2018

Watts Pictures


Roy Moore's Jewy Jew Lawyer Was The Worst Jew To Ever Jew

JEW!  But not really one them, you know, New York jews.  Moore's jew was more of the mormon-christian jew from Liberty University complete fatuous asswipe kind of jew.  Not nearly as much Schlomo as the jew York jewy jew jews.

I Like Watt, But That Reverend Bass Is Still Not Doing It For Me

Something is just off about it.  Idk, but the price is a little high for what you get, too.  It's great that Watt has his own thing, but it's not my bag.

If Trump's Nuclear Button Was Big Enough, He Would Not Be Divorced So Many Times

Undersized, dysfunctional nuclear launcher means the ladies are never really satisfied.  Like Bill O'Reilly's ex, they leave you for more virile guys with equipment and payload they can be proud of.  Sad.

Brief Drive-By Fisking Of The Neoliberal Shitbird John Aravosis

Of course Aravosis was only joking! A joke!! Come on libtards!!!  Aravosis is a well-known jokster, witty guy, and not at all a shabby entry-level establishment pissboy.  Not. At.  All.

What's The Over-Priced Bicycle Equivalent Of An Ex-Parrot?

Serotta? Why, yes!  If ever there was a chump who just give it the fuck up, it's that chump.  That idiot could fuck up anything.  Zathras knows. Zathras knows all about Serotta...