Friday, April 28, 2017

Political Song for Alex Jones to Sing


Alex Jones Is An Exceptional American Loser

Heh, indeedy.  Very bad day for Alex Jones = pretty good day for humanity.  Nice to see some Texas justice get all freaky on him in public like this.  Jones is a piece of shit, and these tiny joys are all we're gonna be gettin', so relish them boys and girls.

Wednesday, April 26, 2017

Newz Nite


Jesus Frakking Christ, The Dems Are All Hopeless Idiots

Hopeless fucking idiot.  Now we all can see exactly how the Dems managed to lose to Donald Trump, as well as why the Dems were so fucking scared of a septuagenarian, centrist Senator from Vermont who was not nearly as big a fucking dipshit as the party.  Politics of failure in the USA, courtesy of two-time loser Hillary Clinton--even after eight years of the entire Democratic Party infrastructure working solely to get her elected, she couldn't manage to beat a blithering numbskull like Trump.

Bernie, had Clinton been forced to actually run against him in an actual competitive primary campaign, would have won the nomination and defeated Trump easily.  Dumb bunnies like Steph Harold were, are, and always will be part of the problem.

Is It Racist To Want Black Dems To Not Be The Biggest Idiots In Their Party?

It seems like we'd all be better off if the black people and the women were not the biggest idiots out there, especially in the Democratic Party.  White dudes usually do a pretty good job of being dipshits, so maybe the black folks and ladies need to up their game and not be so easily lied to and so fucking ignorant.  Sanders is a mainstream centrist politician, but he's also way more popular right now than anyone else, including among rank-and-file minorities of all hues, so the Dems should be doing everything they can to make his popularity their own.  They're not, though, at all, and it looks like one of the big reasons is because African American establishment types--and wannabe establishment types--and their followers are fucking dumber than rocks.

It's Pretty Obvious That Chuck Norris Isn't That Bright

Yes, it's a year old, but that deranged senile old fucker, along with the mouth-breathing teabagger intern who writes this shit for him, is pretty fucking stupid.  He's not just normal, creepy, deluded old-guy dumb.  He's not a mundane screaming racist teabagging dipshit.  Poor old Chuck is a full-on, ocean-going lunatic.

'Star Trek: Discovery' Was Fucked When They Went With That Dumb-Looking Ship

Super-ugly and looks nothing like a Federation ship. Inexcusable.  Hell, even those Axanar shitbirds almost got their Ares ship spot on.  At least it was believable, given the ships we'd seen already.  Plus, the fact that CBS was never really going to show the fucking thing except on your phone was a pretty big indication they didn't give a fuck.

Tuesday, April 25, 2017

Back Thru Time


Your Never-Liberal Establishment Media At Work

The Chicago Trib reprinting a deranged National Review shithead to attack Bernie Sanders.  That sounds about right.  Sanders represents a danger to the rock-ribbed political establishment in the USA, so the not-at-all-liberal media will do whatever it can to stop him.  Anyone out there who believes that the press is liberal is pretty gods-damned stupid, but hey, American exceptionalism!

Nordic Sunrise: Exceptional American Racist Fundie Lunatic Of The Day, Today

 White nationalism and demented religious mania is ugly on the inside and outside.  These are your exceptional American GOP stalwarts.  They love the flag and white skin and jesus--but don't tell 'em jesus was never a real person, but had he been one, he woulda looked like a 50 year old Palestinian guy from 2017 and not a tall, blond-haired 20 year old American white model dudebro. 

Monday, April 24, 2017

In The Rain


Heartfelt Billy Bragg Thing For 'Levi Stubbs' Tears'

Good.  Excellent song, too.  Billy Bragg has held up extraordinarily well.

Oh Noes! Sean Hannity Versus Debbie Schlussel

Two nasty pigs rolling around in their own shit.  This can only end well.  Let's pray to totally made up jesus that these two idiots strangle each other and wind up face down in a puddle of their own filth for our amusement.  Please, jesus.

Not for nothing, but that Schlussel is one scary-looking bitch--500 miles of bad road running straight into hell.

Well-Executed Chelsea Clinton Fisking

Truly the gods' work.  Chelsea Clinton is an even more aggressive form of ass-cancer than her vile mother and disgusting father.  Let's put a stop to this horrible neoliberal madness right fucking now.

Liege-Bastogne-Liege

Big race, with a dominant winner, soon after the Scarponi accident.  It's not fucking easy to win any of these Monuments, so Valverde deserves all the credit as a fucking big-time racer and winner.

Sunday, April 23, 2017

Dancing Daze Again And Again


Freedom Daily: An Exceptional American Cesspool

These sexy brainiacs make the average Freeper sound urbane and intelligent.  Jesus.  You can just smell the stupid coming off those assholes. 

Attn Cancer And Jesus: Kate O'Beirne Is Dead But Peggy Noonan And So Many Others Are Still Alive

Cancer and jesus have shitloads of work to do.  Not that we don't appreciate the Kate O'Beirne removal--A LITTLE LATE!--but there are so many more just as bad out there.  Get to work cancer and your sidekick jesus.

Good News: Kate O'Beirne Is Dead!

That rancid cunt is dead, so it's a good day to be alive!  Fuck yeah!  Every time a nasty racist conservative piece of shit and loathsome reactionary pissgirl is dead and gone, the world gets a little smarter and smells a little better.  Thanks cancer!  (Next time, do us a solid and get to slime like O'Beirne decades earlier.)

Not All Disgustingly Stupid Americans Love Trump

Sad but true.  Ours is a nation of ignorance and failure, and dipshit morons like Laura Marie Heuchan are every bit as responsible for our downfall as the Trumptards and other racist reactionary shitbirds out there.

Scarponi

Michele Scarponi's death is really sad.  He was a true pro bike rider/hard guy and seems to have been a favorite in the peloton.  A senseless accidental death because some idiot in a van made a mistake sucks major ass, dude.

Saturday, April 22, 2017

Girls Like U


Shock Of The Day: Reactionary, Ignorant, Over-Privileged Serotta Forum Twits Don't Understand Wages, Economics, Trade, Or Education

I'M FUCKING SHOCKED!!!!!!!!!  Some nasty cocksucker thinks lowering the minimum wage to nothing is a good idea.  Another doesn't understand education.  Another tariffs.  Jesus, these fucking idiots are such sheep, fed a diet of simple, easy-to-digest right wing horseshit by the establishment media their entire lives and are as such helpless to analyse anything for themselves--or even understand that plenty of places like, say, Germany, or, Norway, maybe Switzerland, have figured out many of these things, but Americans can't fathom any of it because we are too gods-damned ignorant.  Fucking upper-class twits are evil and stupid.  Thanks, Serotta.

Friday, April 21, 2017

Political Song for Melania Trump to Sing


Christian Truther: A Couple Of Braying Fucktards That Make Trump's People Seem Like M.I.T. Scholarship Winners

Jesus must be one dumb motherfucker if this is what he thinks is truth.  Since jesus isn't real, these two poor dumb bastards are just fucking nuts.

Reading Is Not Exactly Fundamental To Gossip Kid Hillbots

I do kinda feel bad for 'em--they have soooo much to learn, but jesus people can't fucking read.  What part of the only Dem candidate could they not understand.  The sad-sack Hillary dead-enders are so fucking ignorant that they can't see where the winning side is.  Sad.

Easy As Cake Bill O'Reilly Fisking

Creepy, no-talent perv loser writes book while waiting to take place at the feet of Roger Ailes.  Not exactly a difficult fisking--from a former gossip kid, btw--but worthy nonetheless.  O'Reilly's shame and failure are making America greater for a while.

Thursday, April 20, 2017

End Of The Ramble


Emma Willard Does Choate A Solid

Releasing their own inquiry right into the middle of everything.  Kinda neat for them that it gets lost in all the commotion the Choate report caused yet gives Choate something else to reference.  Good trick.

Jason Chaffetz: Exceptional American Coward Or Exceptional American Idiot

Why not both?  At it's heart, this Chaffetz thing is just another sign of the murder of the GOP by Trump.  Chaffetz does have what passes for a Utah Mormon fucktard's ambition, but Trump bleeding out the GOP is making it hard for a fool to scam a dollar.  This is good news for the universe, btw.  Thanks, Trump!

America Is Squeezing All The Joy It Can Out Of Bill O'Reilly's Shame

Good job, America.  Fox stabbed him in the heart when he was out of the country and then wouldn't even let him back onto their air to say goodbye to the senile shut-ins and mental-patients and prisoners who love him.  Thanks, Trump!

On Hold


Wednesday, April 19, 2017

If You Got Herpes From Rick Lyman At Choate, Was That At No Extra Charge

A sort of a value-added thing?  Did the other teachers give out STDs as well?  What did Chip Lowery, Chuck Timlin, Kenneth Mills, and Adam Hardej give?  It would be best to know.

Be On The Lookout For Keith Olbermann's New Book 'Killing O'Reilly'

Another American having a pretty good day.  I'm sure that Olbermann will be frantically putting the final touches on that book he's been writing for twenty fucking years, Killing O'Reilly.

Far-Left Zealots, SJWs, Liberal Loons, And Anti-Christmas Atheists Are Having A Grand Day

While demented teabagging fuckfaces and other reactionary buttmunchers and babyman snowflakes are having a very unpleasant day.  Thanks, Trump!

Racist Teabagging Republicans Can't Catch That Brain Parasite Hilbots Get

But they still get the screeching insanity and creepy racism stuff no problem.  Brain parasites need brains to infect, tho.

Fuck Yeah Bill O'Reilly!

Exceptional!  What happens now to the premium subscribers at Bill O'Reilly Dot Com?

Bill O'Reilly's Bad Week

Getting much worse, thank the gods.  That skeevy piece of shit O'Reilly will still have his millions, but his wife left for a much more virile and endowed man of action, his kids hate him because he's an abusive, drunken shithead, and he will now always be known as the guy who got fired because he liked to jam loofahs and falafels up his own ass and jerk off on the phone with women who thought he was disgusting.  That's pretty fucking exceptional. 

Tuesday, April 18, 2017

Jesus At Home In America


The Hill's Important Cottage Industry: Fucking With Clinton Dems

Quite possibly the only worthwhile function ever for The Hill.  But not nothin'.  Wiping out the disease that is the Clinton family and Hillary Clinton's presidential campaigns may be the only hope for democracy.  And also highly entertaining. 

Hilarious Trolling Of Establishment Dem Losers By The Hill

I see what they did there.  But holy shit, the Hilbots went fucking crazy.  They hate the Jew bastard way more than they hate any Republican, even Trump.  Anyone threatening the reactionary neoliberal dogma of the Democratic Party is the most reviled of enemies.  Sanders knows how to win, and the Dems will do everything they can to not listen.

Monday, April 17, 2017

Cherry Bomb


Why Do Those Insidious Brain Parasites Love Dem Pissboys And Pissgirls So Much

They're really pathetic.  Their brains being consumed in their skulls while Hillary and the big-time Dems exploit their mental infirmities to protect every single establishment sinecure.  Some brave doctor needs to cure these people; I hope that doctor will name the cure Burn E. Sander's. 

'At Choate, Word Gets Around' Chuck Timlin Was A Girls' Softball Coach

The word is sure getting around now!  I wonder how many stories we all know about Choate will never see the harsh light of electrons on the internets because nobody came forward.  If you did it once twice you probably did it way more than that, eh Chuck?

Are The Welfare Academia Idiots And Other Dem Stooges Atrios' Biggest Flaw?

Signs point to yes.  Everyone loves Atrios as he skates along that knife-edge, but the welfare academia idiots and other entry-level Dem piss-carriers are such shit that Atrios should know better.  But they're his peeps, and his peeps are John Cole-levels of worthless establishment-Dem shitbags.

Sunday, April 16, 2017

Friday, April 14, 2017

Know Rules


Ruh-Roh, Choate's In Trouble Again--At Least It's Not A Mountain Of Coke This Time, Right Derek Oatis!

And much of the sexual abuse was not gay! Better than the GOP!  But the Choate folks can't be happy today.  As it turns out, some people can't keep their hands off of horny teens even when they are no longer teenagers.  Oops.

Ephemeral Drive-By The The Signal Boost

From that dude Tom Tomorrow who then deleted it for some reason.  Weird.  The The has Twitter, tho.  And a new single including Johnny Marr.

Disc Brake Road Bikes Are Now Officially Literal Comedy

Pure fucking genius.  Anybody who goes for this is a complete and total dipshit.  It's never about better or safer, but always about selling more shit, atmo.

Lindsey Graham Is The Queen Of The Hop

The belle of the balls. A well-known tough guy. Man's man.  That last one is true.  Exceptionally true.  Lindsey Graham is a homosexual.  A closet case.  A hypocrite.  He should embrace his true self and just quit the silly 1980s Rob Halford macho act.

Wednesday, April 12, 2017

How Is That Robert Bentley In Alabama Was Not A Flaming Closet Case?

Usually when these lunatic family-values christian cretins are fucking around, it's with men and/or boys.  Almost every time, the louder some ugly white guy gets with his love for jesus and his hate for the homosexual, the more he reallly loves big hard cocks in every available hole.  I guess Alabama should consider itself quite lucky that their creepy hypocrite governor was jamming his scabrous pecker in some exceptional American vag and not where Bill O'Reilly likes to jam falafels.

Charlie Murphy! Darkness!

Leukemia.  That sucks.  57 is very young unless you are like 20.  Now he can party all the time with Rick James, bitch.

O'Reilly Packed Up His Keester Falafel For A Fun-Filled Definitely Not Suspension

Falafel up ass? Check!  Loofah ready to jam up ass?  Check!  Bill O'Reilly is ready for whatever life brings him now.  It would be fucking hilarious to see him run off Fox "News" like the piggy little bitch he is. 

Tuesday, April 11, 2017

Do You Remember


How Did Obama's Leadership On Merrick Garland Work Out For The Dems?

Obama had that, right?  He was gonna beat the bad guys with his super powers, right?  He was smarter than those teabagging fuckfaces, right?  How'd that work out?  I bet the Dems wish Obama had had the balls to push a recess appointment now...

Alabama Is Everything Exceptional About America

And the governor's true.  A true fucking family-values-loving Republican assclown.  Bentley is probably one of the smartest-ever Alabamian though.  Real fucking rocket surgeons, all of 'em.

Bernie Would Have Won

And he still might.  Maybe just maybe Trump fucks up so badly that expanding Medicare to everyone is the only way...


Bill Hicks, Or Pancreatic Cancer Sucks Ass

Can't say for sure whether Hicks would have grown up into someone closer to George Carlin or Dennis Miller.  All the drugs and booze and hard living can really fuck you up, though Miller was supposedly always sober and turned into a raving fucking dimwit.  Funny about Letterman, too.  Few people give that guy credit for what he did in general or for his brains.

Obama Did A Great Job With Appointments--It's Not Like James Clapper Is A Syphilitic Lunatic Or Anything

They's found da WMDeees!  See!  Retardboy was not completely fucking deranged.  Saddam's bombs were in Syria!  Syria!  Hah hah libtards!  James Clapper says so!!

Tonite On Teh Factor


Sunday, April 9, 2017

Kinksnthings


Surely This Poor Demented Girl Ashley Rae Goldenberg Can't Be The Dumbest Person On Twitter

But...maybe?  She's really fucking stupid, but there's Al Giordano.  And Eric Garland.  And those Nazi fucks.  And Trump.  So, she can't be.  Can she?  It's got to be a joke.  A parody account.  Nobody can be as deranged as Ashley Rae Goldenberg pretends to be.  But the George Mason University thing is proof it's a joke, right?  That's the worst school in the fucking universe--nobody goes there unless they are a truly irredeemable imbecile.  And couldn't get into Pepperdine.  But what if she's not kidding?  What if she really is a vile racist piece of shit?  That would be fucking horrible. 

Ha-Ha! K.T. McFarland Gets Shit Canned

Trump's a winna!  And he sure can pick 'em.  McFarland was a perfect Trump appointee, and all of exceptional America will be sad to see her take inept yet screaming insanity to Singapore.

Dana Milbank Attempts A Fisking Of Mitch McConnell

In the Washington Post.  And it goes pretty much like you'd expect.  Milbank is full-on establishment village idiot so he can't get more than a little bit huffy and glistening over McConnell's gauche politicking, but still, I'm surprised he was able to get even that much dander up.

Losing Trees


Van Avermaet In Roubaix

Miserable fat Belgian bastard wins Paris-Roubaix.  Fast race and nice to see someone new win one of the big classics, atmo. 

Weird Upper-Class Twits Are Creepy

America is a land of idiots and creepy weirdos who don't know shit about shit.  The worst are the teabaggers who say one college or another is too liberal and the other teabaggers who pretend that nasty christian schools like Pepperdine and Berry compete with real schools like Duke and Vanderbilt.  Fucking assholes.

Saturday, April 8, 2017

Mine'd


Study Hard Kids So You Can Go To A Better School Than GW

Twits are fucking suckers.  But it's hilarious that GW is just fucking with the folks dumb enough to pay their price and nobody even cares.  So, kiddos, the plan is to do your homework and pray to jesus fucking christ who you love so much every night that you are a good test-taker so that you can go to a good school like Williams or Swarthmore so that you don't have to put up with the bullshit at stupid places like George Washington University with minuscule endowments and 50% admission.

Jesus, Steve Tilford's Time Was Up

Fucking legit old-school hardguy who brained himself pretty good last year and then this year got himself killed with some insanely bad judgement after a car crash.  Get off the road!  If you are ever in an accident and can move, get off the fucking road. Especially at night!  Get off the fucking road!  Tilford should be alive today.  Bad judgement on a dark road after a shocking event killed him. 

The grim reaper wasn't letting Tilford make 60, no matter what.

Friday, April 7, 2017

Soopatrainz


Bombing Defenceless Poor People Is What Makes America Greater Again And Again

American exceptionalism is illegal war and vicious slaughter.  There's nothing in the world more joyful to the American political establishment than killing helpless people in far-away lands.  Our very exceptional American identity is built on it.  The grotesque murder of those defenceless is how we know we are Americans.  It creates our leaders.  It makes us proud.

Uplifting Slow-Speed Drive-By Fisking Of Joy Ann Reid

By Glenn Greenwald.  Greenwald enjoys this shit, and I think he's a pissy little bitch about these sad-sack buttheads like Reid talking shit about him.  He's very careful to note that he wasn't a pundit or even political until halfway through the 'Retardboy' Bush years and then to produce his first public work, but Reid and the rest of the dimwits are too busy jerking each other off to get that, atmo.

Creepy Racist Fucknuts Are Exceptional Americans, Today

Not too creepy or anything.  I'm sure these are our best and brightest.  And not at all inbred racist web-fingered right-wing pig-fuckers.  Not.  At.  All.

Nuke The Senate!

No more filibuster.  No more racist power plays.  That's good.  Next step is to nuke the whole Senate.  Get rid of it.  The Senate is as anti-democratic an institution as we have in the USA after the Electoral College.  Blow both of 'em to smithereens. 

Thursday, April 6, 2017

Place'd


Devin Nunes: Exceptional American Assclown

Nunes is such an astounding idiot, he belongs in the Trump administration.  Congress is too good for that fucker.  He's hella stupid and would fit right in with the drooling morons surrounding Trump.  It's not often that GOP pukes up someone who can rival the all-around idiocy of Paul Ryan or the troglodyte incompetence of Trey Gowdy, but Devin Nunes has pretty much pulled it off.  Thanks, Trump.

Imagine Being The Junior Staffer/Lackey Who Was Ordered To Explain To Rick Perry What The NSC Is

What a fucking nightmare.  And I'm sure if you complained, you'd get shitcanned immediately.  So some fucking smarmy smart-guy from Oberlin or teabagging fuckface from Claremont McKenna got forced to take the folder and go see Perry with the idea that Rick Perry has no idea what the NSC is or does.  That's almost worse than having to change Dick Cheney's diaper.

The Racist Police State Was Always A Glorious Feature And Not A Bug In Our Exceptional Democracy

Armies of police, war on the drugs used by blacks and other non-white poor people, destruction of homes and cities, it was always part of the grand American exceptionalism.  How else to build a nation for jesus and other white people to enjoy.  This is what has always made America greater again and again.

Wednesday, April 5, 2017

Last Calls


Sad Sally Albright Auto-Fisking

Noxious fools like Albright should just keep their fucking mouths shut.  She gets rolling on some tired anti-Sanders horseshit, with plenty of inane support until her GOP past gets wheeled out and the pile-on begins.  Fun stuff.

Wendy Walsh Is A Great American...Er...Canadian

She sounds nice.  What's hilarious is that an attention whore like Wendy Walsh would not fuck O'Reilly.  I think that tells you all you need to know about Bill O.

Merciless Long-Form Fisking Of Trump, Teabaggers, And The Right-Wing Insanity Mill

It's like a Frankenstein monster story for the modern age.  Who ever would have believed that spending decades lying to racist white shitbirds would create a world where so many fucking cracker assholes couldn't tell reality from a reactionary racist fever dream.  That's fucking nuts, dude.  But now that monster is fucking pissed and rampaging through village after village.  Those dumb old white guys ain't gonna stop till the pitchforks and torches finish the job.

Every Year These Stunt College Admissions Are Pure Bullshit

Whether it's these four dudes, or the dumb kid who gets into every Ivy, it's pure unadulterated shit.  Of course, upper-middle or upper-class black quadruplets are a great stunt for Harvard and Yale, but it's bullshit.  And every year some dumb kid gets into every Ivy League school because both Dartmouth and Cornell and UPenn are the perfect fit for that same kid, and they will surely pick one of those three and never consider Yale or Harvard.  Or it's because the schools and the family are all full of shit, and the dipshits in the media love that kind of useless story.  Probably that.

Tuesday, April 4, 2017

Aspirational


And The Amateur Idiots Of College Confidential Give The Serotta Forum A Run For Their Money

The most annoying white people on Earth are not only found on the Serotta Forum.  Jesus frakking christ.  This woman thinks she is so funny.  And she's not.  I'm not sure how it's spelled, but it is pronounced hackneyed.  Or maybe in English it's trite.  Whatevs.  She's a special flavor of awful--and would look just lovely on a faster-backwards Serotta.  What's great is that she somehow got into a pissing contest with the moronic masters of College Confidential and is apparently banned.  Her kid is attending one of our barely-if-at-all selective private colleges and universities.  Plus she's a slow-witted establishment Dem.  Fucking genius. 

This Red Letter Media Prank Makes More Sense Than The Totality Of The Trump Administration

And it's an average joke.  Not bad.  The Len Kabasinski bit is pretty meta.  It's entertaining.  But compared to Trump, this RLM Horse Ninja gag is a sublime First Fucking Folio and Ulysses mashup.


Squealing Teabagger Of The Day, Today

Unhinged racist fucktard loves Trump.  Of course he does.  These are the people killing your society.  Exceptional!

Another Astounding Twit Shit Show

This level of embarrassing helplessness is killing our society.  These fucking twits have had every privilege in life and should know better.  Or know something, at least.  Jesus.

UNC's Win Was Less Than Ideal

Just more bad mojo piling up in the century of shit.  The game was a disaster, too.  Hard to be a Gonzaga fan in any universe, but North Carolina in general is a symptom of our exceptional disease.

Monday, April 3, 2017

Fun Key


The Dumbest Thing Ever On The Interwebs, Even When Compared To The Rest Of Reddit

Even compared to the rest of Reddit, this is hilariously inept.  This prolix blather is exactly what numbskull Hillary supporters think intelligent argument is.  They're wrong.  Most of what that idiot cocksucker wrote is either completely false or astoundingly overblown.  The meat of his inanity is that the Dem states that Hillary won in the primary wouldn't have voted for Sanders in the general, which is utter nonsense.  The extreme polarization of the electorate is actually what killed Clinton, as she underestimated her need for campaigning so totally that a few thousand disenchanted and disaffected Dems made all difference.  The truth that the poor stupid Reddit asswipe doesn't understand is that Sanders would have easily won all the states Clinton took, plus Florida, plus those rust-belt states that happened to be swing states.  Sanders may have underperformed Clinton--maybe--in the popular vote by a few hundred thousand votes at the most, but that would not have done anything to undo Sanders' electoral college landslide.  Mutton-headed neoliberal establishment Dems will never understand that very simple concept, so they will continue to puke up the same blithering horseshit till they die.  I wonder if this mental-defective Reddit stooge is actually Eric Garland or Peter Daou?

Demented Right-Wing Cocksuckers Of The Day, Today

Because the vast majority of the stupid and the vast majority of the crazy belong to the reactionary shitbags.  Conservative is stupid.  Conservative is psychotic.  And then Al Gore invented the internet and gave those idiots a place to scream their inanity.  Thanks, Al Gore.

The Dems And Their Party Are Too Stupid To Live

If this is the sort of mush-headed thinking that goes into making an establishment Dem voter, then clearly the party as a whole couldn't flicker a 1/2-watt bulb after a bazillion cups of coffee.  The worst part is that all those things Ralph Nader and others like have said about the Democratic Party are 100% true.  The Dems care nothing about winning or governing or policy if that requires abandoning the same right-wing masters controlling the GOP.  All the Dems really care about are clashes at the most marginal margins and nothing at all about fundamental change.  A party focused on winning would co-opt the ideas and energy and supporters of the most popular politician in America and use that to vanquish their enemies.  Except that the Dems enemies aren't in the GOP.  Poor dumb bastards like that drooling fucktard Eric Garland who flops into that twitfest at some point won't ever figure that out.

And This Brutal Drive-By Fisking Of The World's Dumbest Angry Black Lady

Imani Gandy: forever unarmed combatant in any battle of wits.  Nice to see the scum getting kicked around today.  Life-affirming, even.

Radiant Drive-By Fisking Of The Hapless Fuckstain Al Giordano

That's the way it's done!  Sure, Giordano is an easy target, and it is often considered cruel to abuse the mentally infirm, but fuck it.  It's fun!  Giordano sucks huge moose cock.

Shouldn't American Education Assholes Know That The Ivy League Doesn't Give Scholarships?

Jesus, CC is a toilet.  And that idiot is a "professional" on that site.  I understand that Rwanda might not grok elite American colleges, but that Dave Berry asshole?  "CC Admissions Expert"?  Ok, buttmunch.

Sunday, April 2, 2017

TV Party Again


Ted Rall Has No Faith In The Dems

That bastard!  If only we trusted the Dems then they would be winners!  It's our fault that we are always dragging them down.

Your Democratic Party Sucks Ass

Losers!  A grand Dem tradition.  I hope somebody asks these shitbirds how many GOP asswipes voted for Merrick Garland.

True-Believing Establishment Dem Hillary Dead-Enders Are As Imbecilic As Any Trumptard

Using the words Bernie Bro without a hint of irony screams to the world that you are a repellant garbage person who is getting exactly what they deserve in life.  Watching the Dems ignore the consistently most popular politician in the country is not exactly funny, but it is something.

Flanders

Great day for racing over there in Yurp.  Nice to see a homey get the win.

Saturday, April 1, 2017

Up Per


Health Care Wins For America And The Dems

If only the Democratic Party were truly interested in either winning elections and/or providing health care for every American.  Too bad they don't give a shit about either, apparently.  Vast majorities of Americans support universal health coverage such as single payer.  What is lacking is leadership.  Will it come from Trump?  The racist teabaggers?  The few somewhat sane old-timey GOP shitbirds?  The Dems? 

Whoops, Geno Forgot That His Husky Ladies Need To Win In Order To Sustain His Asshattery

It doesn't work when they lose, Geno.  Now the microscopic girls' college basketball universe must remember that shitty states Mississippi and shitty school like South Carolina exist.  It coulda been Connecticut and Stanford.  Way less miserable than Mississippi State and South Carolina.

Friday, March 31, 2017

Tempo Of The Times


Serotta Forum Twits V Speedvagen

There's nothing in the world these idiots can't misunderstand.  Not a SV type girl myself--I'd get a Strong or Rock Lobster ten million times before I'd buy a Speedvagen.  I'd even get a five-years-ago Gaulzetti first.  But the the amazing thing about SV/Vanilla/Sacha White is that he and they managed to create such a stupendous marketing success off of a few finegoodokay bikes/frames built by a bike messenger who took a framebuilding class who just happened to be smart enough to raise his prices by a factor of five or so as soon as he got any recognition at all.  That was genius beyond even what Richard Sachs pulled off, atmo.  All those framebuilder and wannabe framebuilder dudes who give up building or need to keep their day jobs as middle school teachers couldn't do what that Sacha White dude did.  That's what's interesting here.  As usual, the twits supply almost exactly as much trenchant insight and analysis you'd expect from a carp. 

Drive-By Fiskings Of Blathering Neoliberal Fuckfaces Like TBogg Should Be America's Spirit Animals

Glory glory ally lula.  TBogg is everything wrong with America in one nasty, bathetic, wrinkled sack.

Geno Auriemma Is A Top-Tier Asshole

He's a showman, even when he is the show.  He's been really good at proving what a miserable bastard he is for decades now, and the college sporting world should be thankful for that shit.  The game may be pretty boring, but Geno is a fucking asshole.  Great signal-boost for his kid, tho, which is the intended secondary effect, I'm sure.

Thursday, March 30, 2017

Going Back To Cali


California Versus Trump

Uber alles.  Will California be the end of the Trumpster?  Maybe.  But let's drink in the delicious irony that it is the man Jerry Brown himself who put the Golden State in the position to effectively resist the exceptional American collapse into third world status.  Pretty fucking irony indeed.

Ridden On


Please Kids, Stay Away From The Blow--You Don't Want To End Up Like James Woods

Drugs are bad.  Don't do drugs.  Just say no.  Cocaine is a hell of a drug.  Hell's no fun.  No coke.  Please, kids, being a conservative is so fucking bad and being a strung-out cokehead conservative is even worse.

George Ciccariello-Maher Fucking Rules

The Prof really knows how to push the buttons of the dimwit conservative cocksuckers.  Ciccariello-Maher should be a first-strike weapon used against the right on a regular basis.  He's also probably the best thing at Drexel these days!

Wednesday, March 29, 2017

39 Years Ago!

Damn.  If you were born in 1978...




It's Time For Mandatory Retroactive Abortions For Conservatives

Make America greater again by aborting stupidity.  Now's the time to drain the swamp of the revanchist racist, reactionary fucktards and raise the IQ around here.  You know you want to.  Abort conservatives and make America greater again.

Neil Gorsuch Is Every Bit As Vile As His Mother

And when the Dems roll over and put him on the SCOTUS, you can put yet another totally superfluous nail in their fucking coffin.  Gorsuch is a mental-defective, reactionary piece of human filth, just like his cunt mother.  If the Dems can't stop that sort of atrocity, what fucking good are they?

Exceptional Military Budget Atrocities

Dave Lindorff does a good job of highlighting all the bullshit in the budget for the US military.  We spend so much on that useless garbage that we pretend we are all out of money for all the other stuff we actually need.  That's not good.  Not good at all.

Bill O'Reilly Is An Exceptional American

So much American exceptionalism with the falafels and loofahs up the bunghole.  Bill O'Reilly is no average American creepster pervert.  He's exceptional. 

TWIT FIGHT!

The fun part is that both sides are so hilariously shallow and soft-headed.  The nasty twits are just sad assholes and the better twits are helpless losers.  Jesus, if that's your America, you are fucked.

Tuesday, March 28, 2017

Wigout


Is It Time To Consider That Bob Mould Might Be The Greatest American Songwriter?

Sorry, Smokey, but no way.  Bob Mould on the other hand...

Mould has been writing songs for almost 40 years and has produced iconic American music spanning genres from the intensely personal to the blatantly commercial and back again to pop with both noise and restraint the way many shallow Americana writers never could.  Mould has literally changed the sound of music over four decades.  Now might be the time we consider whether he's the greatest American songwriter.

Monday, March 27, 2017

Buzznhowl


Cornell Keeps Coming Up Stupid These Days

Jesus, you would think the doormat of the Ivies would learn to keep its head down.  It was nice when Penn was there for everybody to piss all over, but they spent the money and now those days are gone.  Cornell is the current and forever world-wide leader in the Ivy League basement.  Hell, even Stanford is considered a top school now, up there with HYP.  And UChicago has always been the premier school for those who knew better.  And had no life.  Cornell is just fucking out of it.  Even the gossip kids are kicking 'em around. 

Another Winner If The Dems Cared: $15 Minimum Wage

Indexed.  Embrace Sanders on this shit; steal his popular idea and win.  Or not, because the Dems are not about winning but all about neoliberal dominance.  So they will lose.

Number Six Would Not Approve, Atmo

Who is Number One?  Not WaltWorks.  That's fo sho.  I'm all for weird and goofy shit, but this is really fucking futile.  Of course, it's also twitbait.  But it's dumb; I mean, it doesn't even have any gears! 

You are, Number Six.


Chris Arnade On Point

And much more perceptive than many of his followers, apparently.  Sanders would have won.  Dems hate that, but that doesn't change reality.  Arnade is also on target regarding one aspect of the Trump voter; he's completely missing the point about Trump people being mundane Republican racist assholes who should be burned alive.  But that's fine, as Arnade is doing great work in the same sociopolitical space a Michael Moore and Bernie Sanders, a space Dems have been fucking doing their damnedest to ignore for 60 fucking years.

Lucky Punks


Sunday, March 26, 2017

If They Want To Win, Now Is The Time For The Dems To Embrace Sanders And Health Care

A winning issue.  Very simply: "The Medicare eligibility age shall be lowered to zero."  Don't argue details.  Don't discuss them.  Don't call it single payer or Medicare for all.  Just say that they will introduce a single sentence law that lowers the Medicare age to 0.  Stay on the simple message.  Coverage for everyone who wants it.  Pick any doctor.  Everyone is covered.  Pick any doctor.  Everyone is covered.  Make those nasty Republican cocksuckers choke on their miserable failures.  Everyone is covered.

If This Is The Sort Of Assclown MIT Attracts

Time to burn that dump to the ground.  Of course, M.I.T. is a fine school, and that idiot didn't get in.  But still.  Jesus.  Otoh, while the prep school part of CC is awful, the rest of that site is fucking criminally vile in a plethora of ways few human-caused atrocities have ever been.

The Uranus Jokes Write Themselves

Butt the Oceanus project and other similar endeavors are great places to spend our tax money--and way better than police or drones or aircraft carriers.  Regardless of how long Trump lasts in office, the Dems and any GOP shitbirds sober and/or intelligent enough to get it, atmo should be working the refs on this planetary science work to the benefit of everybody.

Saturday, March 25, 2017

Days In


No Surprise: Mike Brown Was Murdered By A Racist Coward

Hands up. Don't shoot.  Everyone knew it, but the cops and the other racist assholes didn't want to admit it: Mike Brown was murdered by a fucking pants-wetting coward named Darren Wilson.  Many, too many, Americans have a vested interest in not admitting the truth about Brown's murder, but that doesn't change reality.  It was always obvious, but now a few more Americans will have an excuse to understand that truth.

Righteous Fisking Of Richard Spencer

Richard Spencer: Racist asshole and welfare queen.  Of course he is.  Of course he's sucking on the govmint teat.  How could it be any other way.

'The Medicare Eligibility Age Shall Be Lowered To 0'

"The Medicare eligibility age shall be lowered to 0."

"The Medicare eligibility age shall be lowered to 0."

"The Medicare eligibility age shall be lowered to 0."

"The Medicare eligibility age shall be lowered to 0."

"The Medicare eligibility age shall be lowered to 0."

"The Medicare eligibility age shall be lowered to 0."

"The Medicare eligibility age shall be lowered to 0."

"The Medicare eligibility age shall be lowered to 0."

"The Medicare eligibility age shall be lowered to 0."

"The Medicare eligibility age shall be lowered to 0."

"The Medicare eligibility age shall be lowered to 0."

"The Medicare eligibility age shall be lowered to 0."

Friday, March 24, 2017

Punk Rock Song


The LA Times' Ann Friedman Seems Nice

She's right, too: Chelsea Clinton has never gotten a break.  It's been a tough life for Chelsea.  She had to work her way through college working 3 or 4 jobs at a time while supporting her husband and kids, too.  Rough.  Even after finally finishing college, it wasn't easy to for poor Chelsea to find steady work.  She could have used a break, I guess.  That's all it would have taken.  Somebody to look out for her.  That's not the way world works, though.  Everybody has to make it on their own.  Nobody gives you any special favors.  Chelsea Clinton understands that better than most.  She's earned everything she has.  On her own.  Nobody's help.  An exceptional American bootstraps story.  Chelsea Clinton is a fucking hero.  Ann Friedman is a brave and wise truth-teller.

Donald Trump's The Art Of The Fail

So, now will people start to admit that Trump killed the GOP?  Paul Ryan couldn't get an Obamacare repeal through the house.  Not even close.  Trump's meddling only made it more ludicrous.  So what if wouldn't have gone over in the Senate.  Ryan's House failure is majestic in its enormity, but now it is up to the sad-sack Dems to make Trump eat this shit sandwich till he chokes, and I'm pretty sure they ain't up to it.

Donald Trump And Paul Ryan: America's Biggest Cucks

Some people are quite pleased with Trump and Ryan's comical failure on their Trumpcare vote.  The lesser cucks in the GOP aren't real thrilled, though.  Mr. Ace Negotiator failed quite publicly, and Mr. Ayn Rand's Pissboy showed the world he's way less smart and talented than he pretended.  This is good stuff.  A nice day to be alive.

Looks Like Radiohead's Peak Really Was On 'South Park'

Stupid fuckers oughta know better.  Israel is the worst racist state on Earth right now, even more actively terrible than the exceptional USA, and the bands not supporting the BDS movement are greedy fucking scumbags.  I mean we know the Pixies are a joke oldies band at this point, and Aerosmith has been wretched for damn near half a century, but some folks thought better of Radiohead.  Not me, really, but still.

A Solid Point On Canti Brakes

They're good.  Perfect for bikes that aren't actual mountain bikes.  Discs are kinda dumb for things like road bikes and gravel road bikes and cyclocross racing bikes, most of which are only ridden like road bikes, and bikes that aren't mountain bikes.  Cantis are good.  Thanks, twits.

Thursday, March 23, 2017

Gone Boy


Atrios Mans Up And Tells The Truth About Obama

Pretty good step when you do/did collect your check from David Brock.  And the fluffers sure as shit ain't gonna like it.  And while Obama wasn't Trump, Obama sucked wicked bad.  He was a rock-ribbed conservative and loyal servant of the American Empire; every time he had the opportunity to use his authority to advance any of the progressive or left-ish ideals to which he claimed fealty, he adamantly refused. Obama protected the American ruling class and the status quo with every breath he took as President.  He also continued our endless war against the poor and helpless around the world.  Not what we needed.  At all.  Herr Professor Doktor Duncan B. Black steps out and tells some truth.  Finally.  Keep it up, dude.

Demented Right-Wing Morons Are Demented

Maybe that should be deranged.  Or perhaps unhinged.  Whatever.  They're risible reactionary fuckheads, and they are your GOP stalwarts.  Thanks, Trump.

Rick Perry Is A Miserable Stupid Bastard

There's not enough energy left in the universe to properly illuminate just how long and hard Rick Perry sucks giant moose balls.  So the best we can do is notice when he is especially awful.  Fucker.

Oh Noes! The Teabaggers Are Not Happy About The Trumpcare Failure

Pissy pissy pissy little babies.  Glorious to see the GOP and the teabaggers in open conflict over this shit.  Maybe the entertainment value will be worth it.

The NCAA Should Be Dropped Off The Edge Of The World

The NCAA is nothing but fucking fucked up fuckers.  All this bullshit in the interest of tee vee entertainment and piles of cash money to spend on hookers and blow.  There's gotta be a better way.  Start by dragging the NCAA to the edge of the world and pushing it off.  Then pay the players.  See how that works.

Airworthy


Lying About Snowden Has Been An Establishment Feature, Not A Bug

I guess we can discuss whether the reactionary mainstream establishment media was purposely obfuscating the truth about Snowden or whether they were simply hapless incompetents.  Some will say why not both.  Regardless, the false and/or mistaken story of Edward Snowden was the one universally promulgated by the establishment, and, so far, it's been 100% debunked.  Funny, that.

Spectacular James Wolcott Auto-Fisking

Sweet mother of fuckers, Louise Mensch is the first one!  LOUISE MENSCH IS THE FIRST ONE!!  Hot diggity damn, that is fucking outstanding.  Wolcott redefines fatuous for the washed-up Droopy Dog cohort.  Nothing in 2017 gets much better than this shit.  Somewhere a snarky god loves us long time.  We were alive to see this.  We were blessed.

Wednesday, March 22, 2017

Happening Now


Wait, 'Wheeler Dealers' Was Still On?

And has been on for 13 years!?  What the actual fuck.  Who has that kinda time?  Jesus.  I'm not sure all those 13 years were in the current Edd China format, or was that previous show with the other guy called something different?  Anywho. 

David Crockett: Soft-Headed And Puffy Aspiring Clinton Pissboy--America Would Be Better Off Listening To TV's Sonny Crockett

Ah, the insouciant inanity of feckless youth and privilege.  This Crockett shithead is really making a mistake when he goes after anybody brighter than he is--and that's alota folks.  Matt Bruenig has been an extra-extra large amount of fun kicking this idiot around.  (Bruenig has the huge advantage of being right about this shit, right about the Clintons and the Hillary campaign; right about Sanders being the most popular politician in the United States by a huge margin; right about the destructive nature of neoliberal Clintonism with regards to the Dems and America.  He's also a proven and effective asshole, which is why mutton-heads like David Crockett should stay way the fuck away from incisive thinkers like Bruenig.)  And then Luke Savage steps up to curb the fatuous Crockett while he's bleeding there in the gutter just because it's what America demands--or should.  But there he is, this Crockett shitstain, chugging away doing his best to appeal to the neoliberal Democratic Clinton establishment so that they'll employ his fat ass carrying their steaming rancid piss around in buckets for them when he gets through with law school.  That's exceptional!  But if you're looking for brains--or style--clearly ditch this loser David Crockett and go with a brilliant young go-getter like Sonny Crockett, America!

Luxurious Fisking Of The Repugnant Chelsea Clinton

Wonderful, wonderful.  Matt Bruenig takes a minute to obliterate the disgusting life and career of the Clinton hell spawn Chelsea.  This is exactly the sort of great work all of America should be talking about.  Unfortunately, way too many of the useless Dem shitbirds are still fucking around to destroy any hope of progress.

A Serotta Of Some Worth, Perhaps

That's a bit harsh, of course.  While Serotta's were never my bag, I know that the production Titan was a super-solid bike fully worthy of status as a hand-built American production road-racing style frame.  That Ned dude and his bike meant something to that other dude, so rock on, brother.  As signal-boosted right where you'd expect.

Tuesday, March 21, 2017

Political Song for Richard Spencer to Sing


Peter Daou Is America's Number One Asshole

He's a glorious, horrific ocean-going fucktard, and somehow he's even a bigger imbecile than Al Giordano.  That ain't easy, kiddies.  Daou is as gigantic a miserable stupid cocksucker as the Democratic Party has every puked up.  He's a remarkably skilled suck-up though, so as long as the Clintons need a pissboy, Peter Daou will have a job.

Lynne Stewart As Remembered By Jeff Mackler

Outstanding.  Lynne Stewart was one of the rarest of Americans, willing to stand up for her principles at any cost.  How wonderful for all of us that a brave few like Stewart were willing to teach the rest of us what liberty, freedom, law, and justice were supposed to be.  Unfortunately for Stewart, the system was anything but wise or just or fair, but that was not her fault.  It's all of ours.

Here's A Better Idea: Let's Not Listen To Neoliberal Losers Like Mark Begich

Former!! Senator Mark Begich.  He lost.  He didn't win.  He failed.  So why listen to what he has to say.  Anybody who thinks that right-wing douchebags like Mark Begich point the way to victory has not been paying very close attention to even the last 35 years of American history.  That's some special fucking genius right there.  Jesus.

Rap It Up


Fox "News" Attempts To Clean Up The Greasy Stain Called Andrew Napolitano

They gonna need some bleach to get rid of that greasy shit.  Napolitano didn't suddenly become a squealing lunatic sometime in the last week or two; he's been nucking futz for fucking ever, so Fox "News" is being more than a tiny bit silly now.  Napolitano's no worse than anyone else on Fox "News".  They're all disgusting, lying fuckknobs. 

I Love How This Piece Of Shit Idiot Miki Agrawal Is Nothing More Than Trump In A Stupid Hat

Miki Agrawal, full of shit and making herself great again.  Except that she's a vacuous slimeball and vulgar, incompetent bullshit artist with atrocious taste in hats who is clearly next in line to be the self-deluded, low-rent imbecile president of America or some shit.  I love how the whole gaggle of airheads and dimwits slobbered all over her and now can't understand why she's such a garbage fire.  Thanks, Trump.  The Cornell thing is perfect too, as she was clearly a shamelessly shallow and vapid tool who didn't have the stick for Harvard or Yale.  Perfect.

Baseball, Like America, Clearly Too Stupid To Live

Every step is backwards, makes things just a little shittier than before.  Never never no can we have nice things.  We're too dumb to make anything better, so we just keep fucking with it and fucking it up.  Thanks, Trump.

Wipe The Asswipe All Day And Still Never Wipe Away The Crazy

Apparently not parody.  But, how can it not be? It's a fucking joke.  But maybe just maybe they're serious.  Sad.

Jesus What The Frakking Christ

Fuck.  That's awful.  Hard to believe.  I guess it woulda been okay if those kids were exceptionally proud American patriots and had been killed by some racist white guy with a gun, though.  That's how school kids should die.  If they love America and the 2nd Amendment. 

Monday, March 20, 2017

Freaky Style E


Kvale Bike In Blue

Dura-Ace.  Who knew?


John Elway, All-American Idiot

No shit.  Elway was always a garbage-person, so nothing shitty that he ever does should surprise anyone.  Thanks, Trump.

Joe Manchin Should Not Be Trusted Ever

Manchin is about as committed to a single-payer system as Joe Lieberman ever was.  Manchin is also a resolute piece of filth, so anybody who believes him is an asshole of the highest order.

They're All Ass Burgers

Is this a case of being a twit in twit family, a twit in a non-twit family, or a non-twit in a twit family?  We may never know the answers to these questions, but tune in next time for another exciting episode of Bullshit, or Not?

That said, I'm pretty sure we should be beating the living shit out of the DSM-5 so that only people with severe, really fucking severe, developmental and cognitive disabilities are considered for diagnosis.  All this bullshit about "on the spectrum" for completely made up nonsense like Ass-Burgers Syndrome is not helpful to anybody.  Guess what?  Some people are socially retarded.  Some people are not funny.  Some people suck at sports and are clumsy.  Some people don't give a fuck how you feel because you are a worthless cocksucker.  Some people don't grok literature and fiction.  Some people have weirdly narrow interests.  But they're not sick.  They're not clinically abnormal--they're just weird and in some cases incredibly annoying, but they're not ill or disabled and absolutely within the normal human range of being as completely shitty as everyone else.

Louise Mensch And Donna Brazile Deserve Each Other

Both are irredeemable dirtbags and neither is left of anything consequential.  Mensch is no friend to the Democrats or to reason, so she can just fuck right the fuck off and take Brazile with her.

Duke, Wonderful Duke

Wonderful when Duke loses, and they go out like bitches.  All the fake gods love us.  We are blessed.

Thursday, March 16, 2017

Radio Radio


Atrios Makes The Point That The Fed Protects Only A Select Few

Yes, it should be obvious, given the last 50 years of American history, with wages going down, wealth being transferred upwards to the ultra-rich, and the social welfare system becoming totally focused on that insanely rich cohort, but that doesn't mean it shouldn't be repeated over and over: The Federal Reserve acts against the interest of almost every American citizen.  The Fed protects the wealth and privilege of a very few Americans against the economic interests and well-being of nearly every American.  That's not a formula for prosperity, y'all.

Clueless Pampered Twits Are The Fucking Worst

Even if the lot of them are not evil to a man, the are so fucking vacant and just useless.  The dimwits who have enjoyed the overprivileged life of upper-class and upper middle-class white-boy dilettantes truly have nothing to offer the world.  Jesus.

Trolls Trolling Twits Or Twits Trolling Trolls?

It's all one big happy circle jerk.  And these are exactly the fools you have to deal with if your kids go to Choate or Deerfield or any of the truly elite schools.  Fucking nightmare.

Putting Men In Control Of Abortion Will Make America Greater Than Great Again

Birth is too important to trust to ladies and their parts.  Womens are not men.  They bleed and don't die.  Trump needs babies.  Maybe he eats them.  We don't know.  But we do know that men are better at birth decisions than womans.  Jerry Newcombe knows better than a girl.  Jerry Newcombe knows what jesus wants.  Jesus needs babies too.  But jesus def doesn't eat them tho, cuz he doesn't exist.

Putting The Fathead In Fatuous One Dumb Democrat At A Time

Behold the lovely and talented geniuses who worshipped Hillary and delivered the nation to Trump.  They seem nice.  They're not completely useless losers or anything. Not. At. All.

Wednesday, March 15, 2017

Timely



Her 2


The Tax Thing Was Dumb, But Maddow Was Doing Her Job Driving The Right Fucking Crazy

Duh.  The tax thing itself was a nothingburger, but the reaction was fucking brilliant.  Trump went nuts.  Fox "News" went nuts.  The teabaggers and Trumptards went nuts.  That's the point.  They were frightened and panicked.  If Maddow is going to be a fabulist on the side of the good (better, maybe) guys, then this is the kinda shit she can actually do, so she'd better fucking do it properly.  Next!