Without Manning, The Broncos Ruining The Loathsome Patsies Season Is About The Best We Could Hope For

At least Peyton Manning can't take the credit for fucking up the perfect season of Brady and the rest of those slimy fucks.  And this makes Cam Newton and the Panthers look all the better.  The downside is that a regular-season loss probably makes it slightly more likely the Patriots will win the Super Bowl without the pressure of a perfect season during the playoffs.  Oh, well, you gotta take a good day when you get it and worry about Kraft and his merry band of ambulatory turds later.  We're still praying for the day when the NFL goes bye-bye forever, and we can all live in virtue as the gods and jesus have always intended.

Tis The Season For Hating The TeamUnify Platform

TeamUnify is everywhere--and it sucks major ass!  Every fucking swim team in the galaxy seems to use this shit, and and all the websites are all the same, all generic and all shit.  (No offense to these Stingrays--it's just what came up; they're no better or worse than anyone else.)  And it's not just the dumb local clubs using this garbage.  All the sites are ugly and stupid, and at this time of year, you can't escape the atrocity.  Exceptional American shit.  Thanks, Obama.

Hilarious Scientific American Auto-Fisking

In the comments.  Scientific American shits their own bed and publishes a risible pile of greasy bullshit written by some dumb-as-a-post Tory cocksucker, and then the comments section proceeds to eviscerate Scientific American and said Limey dickhead just for the fun of it.  That's some neat stuff right there, and it proves that the readers of SA are clearly more intelligent than the editors of and columnists for SA.

Deadly White Radical Christian NRA Exceptional American Terrorism

Conservative christian radicals are killing in America! Help us jesus! Uh, wait, no, fuck off, jesus.  That's better.

But...

That christian jesus stuff can't be right.  Jesus christians with guns are always the good guys, so it musta been someone else out there killing people at a Planned Parenthood clinic in Colorado today.  Violent conservative christian evangelicals would never commit terrorist murder at a Planned Parenthood!  Unhinged teabagging guntard cocksuckers being terrorists at Planned Parenthood?  That's just crazy, man.

I bet I know what really happened in Colorado Springs.

Those Syrians and Mexicans are at it again, shooting up America because they hate exceptional American freedumb.  Or something.  Immigrants and refugees raping and killing with impunity because Obama and welfare and Democrats and Bernie Sanders and high taxes.  America must stand up!  America must defeat the terrorists in the homeland!  Syrians!  Mexicans!  Blacks!  Democrats!  Gun grabbers!  Environmentalists!  Doctors!  Women!  Women doctors!  They are always out there killing good Americans.

Right?  That's what happened here, right?  Some refugee immigrant environmentalist black Democrat on welfare killed some people with their food stamp guns and raised their taxes, again, right?

I'm sure it had nothing to do with the radical christian hate groups in the Colorado Springs area.  Or all the whackjob conservative evangelical christian asswhipes at the Air Force Academy.  Can't have had anything to do with that.  No racist, bugfuck nutty white guntard Republican assholes out there in Colorado Springs, either.  No violent, white NRA-sponsored radical christian terrorists in Colorado Springs, right?  No way.  Not in my exceptional America.

Musta been the immigrants.  Refugees.  Blacks.  Democrats.  Homos.  They're always causin' trouble.

Thanks, Obama.

And Pounded

Heaven Is For Real Today In Dallas

When the fucking loathsome Cowboys take a legendary beating at the hands of the undefeated Panthers, AND fucking exceptional American loser Tony Romo gets injured and knocked out for the season in front of the home crowd, it's a great gods-damned day and all the gods in all the hells and all the heavens are real for one glorious moment.  Surely it will be wonderful for the whole world when the NFL goes away for ever, but for now, America's Team can go fuck themselves.

The Space Aliens Are Among Us And Apparently They're Teabaggers!

Ain't no wall gonna stop these teabaggin' aliens!  They's from space.  The rock-ribbed reactionary fuckbrains who dig Trump and Carson and Cruz got all the fuckin' knowledge they need to be exceptional Americans!

More Gwar, Hopefully With Fewer Fox "News" Appearances

Now that Dave Brockie is gone, we can all hope that the days of GWAR frontmen appearing on Fox "News" is over.

Grant's Mire

Putin Had Better Pardon Turkey, Too

Russia's military surely is not what Putin pretends, and Russia in general is not as powerful as Putin would have the world believe, but Putin could seriously fuck shit up beyond Turkey and Syria if he is not careful.  Russia reacting rashly is a threat to the whole fucking world, and at this point pretty much all of us are counting on Putin having more sense than the average exceptional American Republican presidential candidate or elected official.  That's the dictionary definition of literally not-good.  Putin probably can't afford to do nothing--missiles in Syria is step one--but I trust the American and French and British diplomatic forces are busy working both the Russians and the Turks to make sure there is no escalation in the shooting war between Russia and NATO.  Despite what the chickenhawks and war industry profiteers littering the establishment media might say, professional diplomacy is pretty much the only solution to this shit show we've created in Syria and Iraq and environs, and better the folks Obama has in place than any of the fuckwits McCain or Romney would have appointed. 

Serious Question: Why The Fuck Do Hard-Right Religious People Have Such A Problem With Homosexuals?

I understand it's from way back, when people were even somehow more ignorant and somehow more hateful and somehow more brutal than they are in 2015, and religion was somehow even more bugfuck insane than it is in 2015, but why, after all this time, is it such a big fucking deal?  Why does religion continue to rot their brains so badly?  Are they just evil, rotten motherfuckers?  They can't all be crazed, self-hating, cock-mongering closet-cases, can they?  Or maybe they are, because if you are not gay, the last thing you really should be thinking about and worrying about is hot, sweaty sexytime between two dudes.  Or ladies.  I don't get it.  Why the fuck would you get so worked up over someone's--anyone's--sex life besides your own?  And your partner's or partners', I guess.  Because your fucking god told you?  That's fucking beyond nuts.  Because it makes you feel good to hate someone?  That's more likely.  So, I guess, it might just be evil, rotten motherfuckers after all as the most likely answer. 

Maddow's all over this shit tonight, but all the clips she's showing from all the braying dipshits sound way too incoherent and goofy to represent all the fear and hatred and ignorance these religious freaks have puked up for thousands of years.  Can it be as basic as just being a hateful piece of shit and homosexuals being an easy, socially-acceptable target for that hate?  Is that all humanity really is: hateful and ignorant and hopelessly so?  Jesus, that's fucking sad.

Glad Tidings For All

Liz Mair, Exceptional American Republican Dimwit, Is Not Taking Down Donald Trump

Mair is another yuge loser Republican, and she ain't up to taking down Trump.  It's funny, in that dwarf-tossing is funny when you're a drunk, web-toed redneck way, but Liz Mair is not smart enough or tough enough to undo the damage Trump is doing to her repugnant Republican party.  Mair has the sort of Midas touch that turns everything she does to shit, but I for one will encourage her to keep up the futility until she wastes every last establishment Republican dollar in the whole fucking world.

Liz Phair would have a better chance of ending the Trump campaign.  

Jesus Frakking Christ, Marco Rubio Is A Yuge Fucking Creep

Who are the scabrous dipshits who would vote for this weeny?  Yeah, Florida, but fuck.  Rubio is such a exceptionally American repulsive loser, with that thin, croaky voice of a prepubescent, chronic bully's victim.  He's not gettin' elected to anything outside that fucktard hothouse south of Georgia, and those dumbfuck bigtime donors are wasting their time and money.  Funny as hell, though! 

Those Blacks Are The Biggest Complainers Ever

Shut up you Black Lives Matter whiners!  All lives matter!  White lives matter!  White lives matter most of all!  Why the fuck are all the blacks getting so uppity every single time a black gets shot by the cops?  You blacks need to just keep quiet and listen to Sean Hannity explain why you deserve to get shot, and when you blacks get shot it is all your own damn fault.  It's not time to jump to conclusions.  The cops always have a very good reason to shoot a black.  Just because there's a video that shows that the cops were lying the whole time about Laquan McDonald, and just because without the video nobody would have been arrested for McDonald's murder, that's no reason to start complaining again.  Michael Brown was guilty!  Tamir Rice was guilty!  Trayvon Martin was guilty!  John Crawford III was guilty!  Eric Garner was guilty!  Walter Scott was guilty!  Guilty of being black and pissing off the cops.  Guilty!  That gets you killed here, boy, so watch the fuck out and quit your protesting, or you're next!

President Trump's gonna take care of you blacks but good.  He knows blacks and knows what you're all about with your protests and your getting shot and complaining.  That will be a great day for America when the white man finally gets back in charge just like jesus always wanted.  Black lives ain't gonna matter for shit in America even more that day.

Sammontana Yellow Masi Is What You Need

Good stuff.  Restored 1973, apparently. 

So Very Fast




Catching Up With Billy Bragg In New Zealand In 1987

We used to want the same things, indeed.  Billy Bragg and New Zealand and the world were young in 1987.  Now...

The Best Cycling Shoes Ever, With Laces And No Twits Allowed

Carnac Lemonds.  Then Legends.  Oh, my these things were freaking wonderful.  Do I still wear them?  Yes?  Do I wish I still had the mountain bike versions, too?  I do.  But road shoes don't go through what mountain bike shoes do, and I don't have any Carnac mountain bike shoes any more.  Sad.

The best Carnacs of that era had a really nice laces n straps system that kept the shoes nice and solid.  Sure, upper-class twits mighta had problems cuz they're, you know, morons, but the Carnacs were great.

Adios David Vitter, Now You Are Free To Shit Your Diaper And Get Spanked By Whores On Your Own Dime

Kbye!  Finally, the besotted cretins in Louisiana decided David Vitter was just way too fucking creepy to elect to anything else.  Good for them.  I'm sure they'll all be receiving gorillagrams from the Nobel committee any day now.  Vitter was an object lesson for the fucking useless Dems, though.  Vitter fucked whores, shit in diapers, and probably loved to get spanked when he was a bad bad boy with a shitty diaper, but he didn't resign and didn't shut up.  If only the Dems had such courage in face of way less disgusting and hilarious scandals. 

But today is a good day, and we can all laugh at the pathetic and disgusting loser David Vitter, off to pay to shit in diapers without the benefit of a government sinecure.  Louisiana is a shithole with or without Vitter, but it got a tiny bit better today.

And another hail and hearty "Fuck You" to Piyush Jindal on his way out as he joins the ignominious ranks of wingnut welfare queens.

Jeez, Doctor Who Really Wasted Arya

Maisie Williams should have been given something interesting to do on the show instead of becoming some mundane dipshit annoying the Doctor longer than the average human.  And though Clara Oswald was never very compelling, Moffat just punted her exit with something pointless and silly.  Really, when a show's been on the tee vee as long as Doctor Who, the chances are good that anything you wanna do has been done better before--Simpsons did it!--so you are a fool if you don't learn the proper way to send off a companion.  If not tragic and heartfelt, the sundering should be simple and quiet.  An idiot's blunder, a cartoon bird, and an anodyne story nobody could give a flying fuck about is not the way to do it. 

Shove L

'The Man In The High Castle' Show Looks Pretty Neat

It's sorta amazing that a company like Amazon can do someting that amounts to high-quality fan fiction.  Amazing that they would want to.  PKD is never easy to film well, but this shit is pretty fucking cool.  Better than expected.  That's somethin'.

Too Bad This Psycho Asswhipe Pride Of Yale Aleksy Vayner Is Dead--He Woulda Made An Ideal Veep For Trump

Aleksy Vayner was just the loathsome piece of human refuse Donald Trump needs to complete his 2016 Republican Dream Ticket.  But no, that fucking walking dollar store-brand rectal suppository Vayner had to go and off himself like a pussy before he could help Trump make America exceptionally great again.  Nice going, asshole.  How will America be great again now?

And what of Yale?  How proud they must have been to manage to admit the only self-deluded lying motherfucker and risible fascist creep on the face earth who might possibly make Bill O'Reilly look sane and decent.  Surely one of the greatest days in the history of that New Haven canker sore Yale University was when that fucking dickhead Vayner killed himself, and they were rid of him once and for all.

Yes, Yes It Did

Battlestar Galactica had the worst tee vee ending ever.

Fuck Paris, Fuck ISIS, The Trump Campaign Is Awesome Right Now And Needs To Be Getting More Coverage!

Donald Trump is killing it right now, but the stupid news in Paris is sucking up all the tee vee airtime.  Trump's easily the most entertaining thing in the world today!  He's going full-on raving fascist demagogue over the prospect of scary refugees and grimy immigrants coming to his very own back yard to eat his lunch or marry his daughter or something, and Trump should be introducing the DONALD TRUMP MAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN BRAND BROWN SHIRTS any minute now.  It's fucking hilarious and even more exciting because we know that we might have a lamp post party in Trump's future!  Trump's also been skullfucking Ben Carson's campaign to death hourly for the last week, but that funfetti is getting buried by the candy-assed politicians and media pissing themselves over ISIS as well.  Trump's where it's at right now, and gods-dammit we are missing out on the exceptional American high-calorie entertainment we deserve!

This Idiot Is Teaching Fucking Sorry-Ass Kids At An Obscenely Expensive Non-Selective Private College

I get it, he hates Nader because Gore lost an election he didn't actually lose, as stupid as that sounds and in fact is, but mostly Scott Lemieux probably hates Ralph Nader oh so much because Nader had, you know, a life and career that mattered instead of being that guy for whom things didn't quite work out they way they'd hoped.  Plus, blaming Nader for Gore not even losing in Florida is one way to bleat and beg the Democratic establishment for some sort of sinecure for deserving entry-level lickspittles.  Good job, Scott!

ISIS Is Still No Threat To The United States--But The NRA Is

ISIS can't hurt the USA, but the U.S. government can certainly use the inane threat of ISIS to undermine American society--and they are.  Even worse, ISIS couldn't do as much damage to America on their best day as the NRA and the racist guntards do every gods-damned day.  ISIS doesn't have drones or attack helicopters or fighter-bombers or aircraft carriers or cruise missiles, and they can't hurt us at all.  The best ISIS can hope is that our cowardly, right-wing government loses its shit and panics exactly as they are right now, doing the work to destroy American society ISIS could never do on their own.  Meanwhile, the guntards and the rest of the violent, exceptionally American psychos continue their assault on exceptional American freedom and on the exceptional American peaceful society every fucking day of the year.  Genius!

Refugees And Immigrants Are No Threat To The United States

Republicans, teabaggers, Koch-suckers, and other assorted reactionary fuckwits are exceptionally yuge all-American pussies, shitting themselves like David Vitter over refugees and immigrants and orphans and other helpless people all over the world.  It is great fucking politics for the truly evil rock-ribbed Republican establishment, though, so expect to hear shit tons more cowardly wailing over the thought of helpless, starving children attacking the USA and stealing your guns and your jesus.  Small-minded bigots, racist piss stains, and bed-wetting guntards are too stupid to know any better, and they are the exceptional American Republican party voters.

Ben Carson Is An Exceptionally True-Blue American Idiot

The puppet betrays the master.  I guess we know how Carson treats his friends; Armstrong Williams turned Ben Carson into a teabagger cash machine, and now Carson is betraying that trust which enriched him--and Williams.  Well, after Trump cut Carson's balls off in the campaign, everyone knew the clock was ticking, and this is the sign that Carson's on the way out and heading back to living the teabagging jesus freak minstrel show Armstrong Williams produced for him.

Racist Fuckwit Of The Day Is Timothy Whiteman--No, Really, Whiteman Is A Racist Teabagger!!

Stupid, ugly, nasty, racist, ignorant is your exceptional American teabagger.  Only the creepiest reactionary pissstains are dumb enough to conflate slavery and treason with the struggle for civil rights.  Of course, teabaggers love Trump and Carson, and to a man teabaggers are violent, slobbering, hate-filled assholes.

Finally, More People Are Seeing That Ben Carson Is A Fucking Moron

Welcome to the party pals.  Carson is a fucking idiot and always has been.  Even the staff from the Carson campaign know that Carson is a complete fuckhead.  It's about time that the rest of exceptionally exceptional Americans admit the truth. 

A Touch Of Actual History With Your Friend Robert Fisk

You know, the man who spent his life living in and reporting from that place causing all the trouble these days.  Yeah, that guy.  Anywho, it turns out there's a ton of fucked up shit we all probably need to keep in mind when spouting off about and shitting our David Vitter brand big-boy diapers over all the unpleasantness over there in that Arab world/Muslim world/lands where jesus hid all our christian oil.  Fisk is on the case for all the dummies in the English-speaking world.  Will very many people pay attention and learn something in exceptionally ignorant America?  Nah.

Political Song for Exceptional American Reactionary Cowards to Sing

Fuck Off, Piyush

Jindal is and always was a yuge piece of rancid dog shit, and America is much more exceptional now that he is not gonna be President.  Fuck you, Piyush.  Nobody likes you and you suck donkey dick.  Kbye.

How Stupid Do You Have To Be To Not Understand Shoe Laces, Upper-Class Twit Edition

Jesus.  Shoe laces.  Come, on, twits.  Shoe laces have one very specific advantage in that they allow customizing the amount of tension on specific parts of your foot.  This shit's especially important if you have oddly shaped or sized feets!  Laces give you more options for getting it just right, but like downtube shifters or a proper manual transmissions, they may require a bit more skill or attention than some other things.  Deal with it, assholes.  A few of 'em get it, atmo, but the rest are just fucking dim.  Jesus.

Oh, It Is A Glorious Time To Be An Exceptional American Petty Demagogue And A Small-Minded Bigot

The squeals of the cowards and demagogues are all you can hear in America today.  The cynical reactionary Republicans are happy to lather up their ignorant and hateful constituents, ginning up the imaginary threats to get the cowardly exceptional American bigots and racists all wet and sticky and maybe, just maybe steer the U.S. into another exceptionally profitable terrorist war against the helpless stupid people dumb enough to have been born in the lands where jesus put our oil.  This is a great time for the hateful teabaggers and senile Fox "News" demographic because now all their fears are being spoon fed to them by their masters.  America is an exceptionally nasty society.  Fuck, yeah!

Where NOT To Go For Vital Cyclocross Coverage, ATMO

Check!  Can't really blame the idiots for not knowing shit about anything beyond their small, small world, but still.  Isn't it time we should be doing better, though?  It is.  It is. 

Worthless, Shitheaded Limey Cocksucker Version Of A Teabagger

This greasy scumbag.  He's every bit as creepy and fucking stupid as any exceptional American teabagger and fits right in with the reactionary ignorance of the common Limey piece of shit.  Vile walking shitstains are about all those assholes got left over in Blighty. 

Masi Bikes Were Nice, People Sukk Asss

 Ray Dobbins.  Now living in Peru, apparently.  But this bike is completely nuts, CyclArt repaint and great components, and meant to be a rideable classic.  He posted a yuge batch of high-def pictures on his site.  Beautiful.

Now That We Are In The Meet Season, Let's Talk About How Much The Speedo Teamster Backpack Still Sucks!

Sucks!  Huge donkey balls!  This thing sucks.  Compared to both the previous Speedo backpack and the so-much-nicer-TYR-backpack-that-the-Zone-team-got-for-us, the official team issue Speedo Teamster backpack is just shit.  Let's hope to jesus that they fall apart so that we have an excuse to use the TYR!  This post bitching about this fucking piece of shit will be annual or biannual until we get a better team backpack, or we find another sport with more useful dedicated baggage.

The Pennsyltucky Vatican Will Always Be A Shit Show

Lovely.  Quibbling over whether the serial child rapist was technically an employee of the Pennsyltucky Vatican or simply an independent contractor or a special guest with raping privileges is fucking brilliant considering he spent decades raping children while the entire crappy college looked the other way.  Assholes.  I would be in favor of creating an actual hell so these scumbags could burn there.

The NRA And Their Terrorist Guntard Minions Kill More Innocent People Every Four Days Than The Paris Assholes Did

Every four days we kill more people in our country than the shitheads who shot up Paris recently.  Four.  Fucking.  Days.

So fuck all those racist Republican dickheads and loathsome NRA cocksuckers and pathetic chickenhawk motherfuckers who want to murder all the refugees and all poors.  Fuck them in the skull with a barbed lion dick.  Fuck them till they bleed out.  They are vile, hateful, racist, violent bastards who deserve no quarter.  All they want is MORE dead and MORE killing and MORE profiteering for themselves and MORE suffering for the helpless.  Fuck them.

Fuck.

Them.

Dana Perino: The Only Thing That Could Make The Greta Van Susteren Show More Insanely Stupid

Greta Van Susteren is a nearly brainless whackjob, but holy fuck, once you add Dana Perino to that format you get all sorts of repugnant inanity.  Perino is an especially ugly sort of addle-headed reactionary establishment creep.

The NY Football Giants Are History's Greatest Villains

Worse than Nazis, the NRA, Paul Wolfowitz, and Donald Trump's hairstylist put together.  What fucking good are the gods-damned Giants if they can't finish off the repugnant Patsies? 

Mark Levin Is A Yuge, Herpes-Scarred, Weeping Asshole

If only there could have been a thousand more dead in Paris!  Levin is an ugly little creep and nasty fucking dickbrain.  Imagine all those 80,000 fucking Frogs and Krauts at the friendly firing away with their exceptional American handguns and shit!  Drunken slaughter is exceptionally American!  Or the Bataclan jam packed with every idiot there shooting at every other idiot in a panic!  Exceptional!  American!  The NRA is your friend!  Levin is a repellent greasy stain on our exceptional American society, and once Trump's Operation Wetback gets rolling, we should make sure Levin is soaked through.

Because of the French gun policy and French police, the death toll was in the hundreds and not thousands.  In America, we could have turned a bad night into massacre.  NRA!  NRA!!

Shocking Video Evidence Of James May's Sordid Rock And Roll Past

And, Stanford Is A Joke, And Their Football Team Sucks

You now how some kinds of people think you can have a huge athletic machine AND a world-class university coexist?  They are so very wrong.  Just ask Duke.

Oregon Is An Odd And Occasionally Wonderful Place

This fucking whale thing was just brilliant.  Dynamite.  Oregon.  Genius.

The Greatest Human On The Serotta Forum Ever, ATMO

A better man than jesus, moses, Chuckles Heston, and Donald Trump put together!  It was fucking lovely to see how the racist assholes went crazy after that truth got dropped.  Preach on brother!

Under The Cherry Cola

Political Song for Ben Carson to Sing in Paris

Not For Nothing, But Those Stupid Motherfuckers In Paris Probably Just Handed The Republican Nomination To Trump

This mass murder in Paris will need to add the Republican Party in the United States to its list of victims.  Trump's campaign had probably gelded Carson already, but this shit show in Paris is gonna make Carson look all the more goofy and unhinged in the aftermath as that poor clueless bastard Carson gurgles inanely about fighting the Chinese communist commandos in Paris and bombing ISIS in their caves of Uzebeckybeckybeckystan and shaming Putin's gay affair with Obama.  Now most of that evaporating Carson support will be going right to Trump, and the Republican elite are all kinds of fucked.  How will they get Trump out when he has the majority of the primary votes?  It's gonna be ugly for the Republicans and unbelievably entertaining for the rest of the world.  It may very well destroy the Republican Party brand in the USA forever, and that is so wonderful to contemplate.  Unless the Frogs do something crazy and join up with Putin and Obama and start WWIII in Syria or Indochina or somewhere over this fucking thing. 

Kevin Drum Is The Weakest Link At Mother Jones

I hope.  Drum's always been an insistent wannabe, striving for a place in the establishment media village and a sinecure as an obsessively masturbating idiot.  First of all, does Drum think Trump went fucking crazy just recently?  Really, asshole?  Where the fuck have you been for the last generation?  Trump's certifiable, but he didn't lose it just this week or anything.  Also, Kevin Drum's deluded if he thinks that clip was Iowa turning on Trump.  Many exceptional Americans might want to believe Trump is going somewhere where nobody has to deal with him ever again, but no.  Trump's the man in 2015 & 2016, and a sizable percentage of our exceptional American shitheads are gonna go all the way with that fucking dickhead.  Drum's a fool if he doesn't or can't see that reality.

I'm Not Sure Jeffrey St. Clair Gets Bernie Sanders, ATMO

Is St. Clair being willfully obtuse here in the service of questionable snark? Comedy? Satire? Parody?  Not sure, atmo, but surely St. Clair understands Sanders is a boring centrist politician with quotidian centrist policy positions and beliefs, and being oh so offended Sanders is not a ravaging leftist or much of a leftist at all makes you sounda dumb.  Right?  Especially if you are supposed to have a more rational and nuanced view of American politics than an addle-headed teabagger or scuzz-guzzling establishment media village idiot?  I mean, I hope so.

Upper-Class Twits And Their Inane Prayers, Vile Ignorance, And Casual Racism

What the fuck are prayers gonna do you stupid assholes? Prayers to what or to whom? Stupid fictional sky wizards? Upper-class twits are loathsome fuckbrains.  Praying is bullshit and not at all useful in any way.  Those Serotta assholes should be rounded up as part of the first wave of Trump's Operation Wetback.  And of course the most repugnant of the racist creeps there came out to spray the whole dump with his fetid hate.  Then the shitheads start acting like brainless, chickenhawk simps.  What a shitty place is the Serotta forum filled with awful people.

Here2Fall

Me4Him

No Sympathy For Anyone Who Buys A Chrysler Product

Did they not sell the Neon in Australia?  Any other Dodge or Chrysler product?  So fuck anyone dumb enough to buy anything from that fucking company.  No Lemon Laws for the fucking Drongos, eh?  Well, that sucks for that guy.  But it's fucking brilliant for Jeep!

Fuckheaded Racist Teabagger Assholes Don't Know 'Idiocracy' Was About Them

These dumb motherfuckers don't quite understand that Idiocracy is a movie about what happens when their stupidity destroys the world.  It's cute that they like the movie, but it is sorta brilliant that they don't know the whole future of idiocy is their expressed ignorant, hateful, hopeless personal future.  Heh, indeedy.

What The Hell Are The Bills And The Jets Wearing Tonight?

They look like a cut-rate Kansas City preschool christmas review playing that game.  Jeezus.

Sweet Fucking Jesus, Hannity Brought Out The Minstrel Review Tonight

That sick Uncle Tom some-fucking-loser-with-a-shitty-book, that demented Uncle Tom sheriff cocksucker, and some punching bag black guy all lined up to dance for Massa Sean and sing all his favorite self-hating Negro spirituals.  Fucking disgusting.

Wendy Davis Is A Great American

And the jesus-freak shitheads hate her so much.  That's good enough in my book; anyone who elicits such squealing from those teabagger fuckwads has gotta be pretty fucking cool.  Too bad she wasn't a better politician and that Texas didn't have an aggregate IQ above room temperature. 

Dave Lindorff's Veteran's Day

No more veterans.  Yes.  Good.  Support the troops by bringing them home.  Support the troops by cutting the number of troops by a fucking whole bunch, shrinking the number of veterans.  That's the way to do it.  That's what we need for America and the world.  Lindorff's right, but too bad the vast fruited plains full of morons are not listening and never will as long as America remains an exceptionally ignorant and violent empire.

David Vitter's Shitty Diaper Fuck Dynasty

Smells like freedumb!  I wonder what those two cowpokes were doing with each other out there in them woods?  Bet it was a teabagging good time!  If Vitter kicked the shitting-in-diapers-and-getting-spanked-by-hookers habit, maybe he did it by exceptional American teabagging out in the woods with some special pals!

Erik Loomis Gets Bernie Sanders, ATMO

Not rocket surgery, but minor victory, I think--he more or less gets it, atmo.  Sanders is nothing revolutionary, but in fact is an establishment, boring, center-left politician, A U.S. SENATOR, with very boring, centrist beliefs and politics.  Only in our demented society would Sanders be considered a leftist revolutionary.  Loomis understands, apparently, and that's somethin'.

The problem with Hillary Clinton--given that a Clinton administration or an Erik Loomis administration or a Virag administration would not be too too much different than a Sanders administration at the end of the day--the problem is that Hillary Clinton is HILLARY FUCKING CLINTON and being a fucking Clinton is as bad as being a Bush in 2015 (or ever).  Clinton's tenure as president may be that of a generic, essentially useless Democrat in practice for the most part, but being a Clinton is just so fucking shitty that that is the simple fact which should disqualify her from ever being president.  The Clintons are not simply awful people and terrible Democrats, they are some of the worst Americans in history, and the first Clinton presidency was every bit as big a disaster for America as Retardboy Bush or the real Bush or Reagan. 

Another Lost Opportunity For The Serotta Demographic

Lovely people.  First class.  I'm sure they all woulda ridden Serottas.  A missed opportunity for the upper-class twit cohort.

Useless Racist, Homophobic Assholes Should Be Deported

And fired into the sun.  These quivering fuckstains serve no purpose beyond stinking up our country, so let's get President Trump to deport these fuckers.

Trump's Operation Wetback Deports Its First Victim: John Kasich

Donal Trump unleashed his own Operation Wetback last night at the debate, and bagged his first forced deportation straight away: John Kasich.  The teabaggers and other racist shitheels savaged Kasich as Trump was jamming Kasich over the wall back to whatever third-world hellhole he came from.  Kasich is all done, and no exceptional American is sad to see him go.

More Not At All Liberal, Never Liberal, Media

Assholes, yes, but not liberal assholes.  The media, all of it, NPR, the big papers, all of it, are not liberal and never have been.  At their best, they were honest strivers working to the best of their abilities to get the news out to the people.  At their worst, well, look around.  And Fox "News" is only the most gleefully honest about their awfulness and hateful lies. 

Orange Lobsta

Cool.  Must be really bright in person.  I'm not a yuge fan of the tapered headtube and plastic carbon fork, but the elegant steel tubes always look good.

Water Landing

How Completely Fucked Is The Republican Party After Carson Drops Out?

World-class doofus Ben Carson's time left in the race is coming to its end, but what the fuck is going to happen to the Republican when Carson's gone and all that support goes to Trump?  The GOP will be in a yuge world of shit.  How the fuck can they function with Trump as their presumptive nominee?  They can't, so what the fuck will they do?  This is gonna be fucking amazing, and all decent, gods-fearing, exceptional Americans will be glad they were born so they can witness the hilarity. 

George Will Hammering Bill O'Reilly Is Getting More Fun

Yay!  George Will is in fact probably a big enough fuckhead to believe he can reclaim the Republicans from the Bill O'Reilly/Fox "News"/teabagger axis, and that makes this whole shit show even more hilarious.  Will has spent his whole life in the warm, putrid embrace of the ignorance and racist hatred of the Republican party, and only now that a hopeless vulgarian like Bill O'Reilly has become a Republican party icon is Will so very disturbed.  Will is a fatuous fuckstain, but he hates O'Reilly so much that we are all blessed to see these two nasty creeps fight it out in public.

Even the teabaggers can't believe it is happening like this.  When even such loathsome reactionaries as Commentary start in on O'Reilly, we are living in truly wonderful times!

TS 2015

Clueless Over-Privileged Assholes Who Probably Would Have Ridden Serottas

Old thread, but those fools would fit right in on the Serotta forum.  Brain-dead, bugfuck ignorant, smarmy, over-privileged upper-class twits who know nothing about anything.  What those assholes don't understand about elite boarding schools would fill a library at Hotchkiss, but that doesn't stop them from puking up their bullshit spiel.  And school like Exeter or St. Paul's are nothing like the famous day schools in the D.C. area--the elite boarding schools are waayyy better in every way.  Good thing those assholes mostly don't have a clue.

Ted Cruz Giving Head Is Something America Would Not Survive

Scary. Funny, but insanely frightening. Cruz on his knees, slurping away like a spaz...That would be something so disgusting that it would surely destroy America once and for all.  Sr. Lee Papa should be ashamed of himself, putting that visual into the exceptional American skull, where it will dissolve what is left of American sanity and burn a hole right in the bottom our souls.

Whether Forecastin'

Eric Gaffney Is

Was, whatever.  But he sure is entertaining, and I mean that in a good way.  Sebadoh was def never the same without him.  Gaffney has musical aesthetic sensibilities which appeal to me, so count me as a fan.  I'm kinda glad I don't have to live with him or anything, tho.

SHADO-Fax

Uber-Fisking Steven Spielberg

Fisk Spielberg because his movies are garbage--it was a screaming drop off a cliff after Jaws.  But if you wanna fisk him because he's a worthless Zionist asshole, that's even better!

Teabaggers Are Losing Their Shit Over Ben Carson's Scams And Lies

The reactionary asswhipes cannot control themselves now as Ben Carson is being revealed as an insane liar and all-around idiot.  The right-wing establishment is lost and flailing, caught in the trap that Carson and his puppet-master Armstrong Williams set for senile Republicans and addle-headed racist conservatives.  It might be fun to watch--It Is!, It Is!--but it's also kinda sad that Carson has gotten away with this shit for so long. 

No, Fuckwads, There Never Was A "Liberal" Media

Never.  MSNBC is not liberal, and it never was--nor was there ever a liberal media.  MSNBC got pummeled over their sloppy and mortifying Koch-sucking, but the bigger issue is that the LIBERAL MEDIA! was always the construct of lying right-wing assholes.  Sure, at some point in the past when we had reporters--remember them, people who reported the news after investigation and questioning?--those reporters, being people who needed brains and needed to use them, were probably rarely addle-headed reactionary morons in the mold of Rush Limbaugh and Sean Hannity and Bill O'Reilly and Megyn Kelly and a billion other dipshits, but the newspapers and radio stations and television companies and other news organizations were never left-wing.  If they were honest, they tried their best to get the stories and the facts and report them to the best of their abilities.  The legitimate left-wing magazines and papers, not at all big business interests like big-city papers or small newspapers or broadcast companies, never hid their agendas behind straight news or "fair and balanced" but given the overwhelming predilection and affinity for the truth, reality, and sanity to have a left-wing bias, you were much more likely to get the best information from the a hard lefty than from a completely brain-dead right-wing shithead.

Only now in the shuddering death of American society do we have the big media companies finally screaming their everlasting right-wing bias through their mouthpieces on the tee vee and in the papers without fear from reporters or sophisticated citizens holding them accountable.

Josh Marshall Gets On The Armstrong Williams Case

Armstrong Williams is using Ben Carson as a cash machine, and he has been doing it for years!  That's the scoop.  Williams is the "business manager" for Carson, which means the books and quack pills and the speeches and the other bullshit, AND he is the "business manager" for the Carson campaign, which is now properly understood as a continuation of all the other Ben Carson, Inc. scams Armstrong Williams has captained all along.  The Ben Carson for President campaign is nothing more than another grift designed to enrich Armstrong Williams and Ben Carson. 

Marshall is not the first person to note this--Jonathan Chait had this NY Mag piece that really got the ball rolling on this shitty scam Carson and Williams are pulling on the most vulnerable and addle-headed teabaggers and other reactionary fucknuts--but as the story gets bigger and bigger and finally explodes, the hilarity will explode as well as everyone laughs at the suckers. 

Satisfying Weezer Fisking

Weezer is the worst band in rock history, easily worse than even Creed.  Weezer is the vile bastard spawn of Pavement, and Matt Sharp running the fuck out of the band shows that maybe Sharp is worthy of rescue when the world comes to its senses and dissolves everything Weezer in a vat of boiling rat piss.

Ben Carson Does Keep Getting Weirder

Why is Carson doing this to himself?  Is he so fucking deluded and insane that he had no idea how fucking stupid he would look after his horseshit mountain was discovered by the wider world?  That's sick, dude.  Or maybe Carson is the victim of some x-specially slimy teabagging fuckwits led by exceptional American flamer Armstrong Williams.  Either way, Carson is quickly becoming a pathetic joke around the world.  All that's left is for some enterprising cub reporter to discover the Guatemalan midget employed by JHU who did all the surgery in place of Carson and hid under the gurney while civilians were watching.

Is Carolina For Real?

Usually, nothing in the Carolinas is really any good.  It's always kinda shitty, and you notice that after a while even if you didn't notice at first, especially when compared to real places that matter.  UNC?  Yep, shitty.  Duke?  Sure.  The entire state of South Carolina and everyone in it, including Hilton Head and Myrtle Beach?  Totally sucks ass.  That makes it seem impossible that the Panthers are for real, but maybe, for once, something from the Carolinas is not way more useless and shitty than you first thought.  That's fucked up, dude.

From Today's No Shit File: Ben Carson Is A Fucking Loon--And Tacky As Fuck, Too

Poor crazy and dumb old Ben Carson is getting skull fucked royally now, and if he were actually running for president, then his campaign would be over.  Since he's running a scam and not a campaign, he'll keep on scamming the teabagger assholes for a while yet, but everyone else is going to enjoy learning just how skeevy and tacky he really is.  Carson is way too much of an exceptional American buffoon to be taken seriously, but at least he is being a fairly entertaining clown for all of us.

Michigan State Football Got Fucked

They got lucky against their vile in-state rivals, but tonight Michigan State got boned by a bad call late in the game against Nebraska, which, surprisingly, is a state in the USA apparently. 

Upper Class Twits Guntard Inanity

Violent, unhinged guntard assholes can be upper class twits.  Let's hope exceptional America has the exceptional American wisdom to take the guns from the fuckers and the cops and be way more like Australia when it comes to guns.  And if the NRA and the guntards want to fight it out, let's see who wins. 

On the plus side, at least a couple of those folks actively trolled the usual reactionary shitheads just for fun.

Political Song for Ben Carson to Sing

Well, It Looks Like America Finally Found A Democrat Willing To Call David Vitter Out For His Whoremongering

John Bel Edwards.--not John Edwards.  Anyway, the establishment scuzzbags in both parties must be very uncomfortable over this, but finally, America gets a politician who is willing to call out a hypocrite and asshole like David Vitter, the fine, god-fearing family man who liked to shit into diapers before being punished by hookers.  Or something.  But whatever creepy, disgusting, perverted kink Vitter was paying hookers for, it sure is not something the American public have heard enough about, so kudos to John Bel Edwards for not being as big a pussy as all the Dems in Washington.  The ad is running during the big LSU football game this weekend, so this could be kinda really fucking fun!

 

Oh Goody! George Will And Bill O'Reilly Are Squaring Off In A Braindead Reactionary Fucktard Cage Match Over That Vile Dead Cocksucker Ronald Reagan

This is fun!  George Will is pissy over Reagan, and Bill O'Reilly spent a segment yelling at Will for daring to question Billo's insanity.  I was waiting for Will to bring up O'Reilly's repeated lying or Andrea Mackris or O'Reilly's divorce and child custody defeats or spousal abuse.  I wonder if Will will have the balls to keep up this fight--he has a real chance to take O'Reilly down over this, as O'Reilly could barely deal with him on his own prerecorded show.  George Will looked really pissed at O'Reilly for O'Reilly preening masturbation of Reagan's rotting skull, so this might be the start of something really fun for all exceptional Americans.  If this thing breaks out into actual hostilities anywhere other than O'Reilly's safe space on his show, Billo's fucked.  Will really got to O'Reilly, and O'Reilly would never be able to handle himself live.

So, Now Everybody Knows Ben Carson Is A Gigantic Fucking Liar And Full-On Ocean-Going Lunatic

What took so fucking long?  It was apparent from the start that Carson was so full of shit and so addle-headed that he could never be trusted with even being a dog-catcher.  At least now, the rest of the world sees exactly what a fucking moron Carson is and always has been.  I can't wait till they find that Guatemalan midget who did all of Carson's purported surgeries for all those years!  Johns Fucking Hopkins must be pretty fucking proud about now.

What's the official Johns Hopkins positions on pyramids as granaries?  Or quack dietary supplements claiming to cure cancer (but not stupidity!)?  Hey indeedy.

Obama's Epic Trolling Of The Republicans Over The Keystone XL Pipeline Was Really Quite Wonderful

The Republicans and Koch-suckers and teabaggers are apoplectic--and I'm sure Obama would have approved the pipeline had it been politically expedient--but the way the President slammed those assholes after seven fucking years was beautifully entertaining.  It doesn't hurt that oil prices are way down these days, but the reactionary fuckbrains are not having any logic or sanity, so Obama took the opportunity to rub their faces in it while the whole world watched.  Loverly!

Damn, Those Cowboys And Greg Hardy Are Great Folks!

First class! Tip top! Good people!  America's Team!  Exceptional Americans!  We should be so proud.  When can we take the entire NFL and burn it to the ground?

Is Hateful Eight Gonna Be Way Huge Thanks To Idiot Cops And Fox "News" Assholes?

The trailer looks good.  That's no a guarantee or anything, but if the flick's decent and those fucking reactionary morons keep up all the free publicity, Hateful Eight could be yuge!

Pro Tip: There Is No Democracy In America Anymore

Not even as much as there used to be, which was not much.  The Kentucky shit show could simply be that Jack Conway is a fucking loser, but it might not.  And the best part is that there is no way to check.  The voting machines without physical ballots are a complete joke, and the joke's on you.  This is not an accident.  And not the way a democracy or representative republic or any sort of elected government should work.  Any asshole out there who gave a flying fuck about integrity or honesty would demand that their government maintain a procedure for double checking elections, especially in cases where something is clearly fucked up, Kentucky, Ohio, Florida, and on and on and on.  But of course, no one does because no one cares.  Fuck yeah American exceptionalism!

Nifty Signal Boost Of Beat Happening And K Records By The AV Club

Good stuff.  Beat Happening is one of those things that I like, so I am always in favor of getting out the happy message of Beat Happening and the K Records bands and music.  Lots of fun there and exactly the sort of thing that will make your life better.  Try it!

Teabagger Patriot Foods Needs A Much Rougher Fisking

Gross? Sure? Marketed toward teabagging guntard assholes? Yep.  But there's so much more funfetti to be mined from this crazy shit, from the Patriot Food companies, to the racist guntard paranoia, to the rancid, puss-bloated STUPID!, really the fisking must be better than this one.  Fisk away, fiskers!

Shaggin' Mem-O-Reez

At Least Quentin Tarantino Had The Good Sense To NOT Apologize

More people with a forum should have as much brains and balls.  The hard-right loons and fascist assholes and pussy cops and Fox "News" teabagging dipshits turned themselves inside out trying to get Quentin Tarantino to back down, but he was an exceptional American hero and refused to be bullied.  Holy shit!  Why aren't more assholes like that?  Why can't we get even some of our elected leaders to show as much basic human decency as Quentin Fucking Tarantino?  I have never thought Tarantino was any great genius--he always seemed like an average movie geek who made movies for average movie geeks, but damn, he's got more balls and more brains than many exceptional Americans.

Ahmed Chalabi Died 70 Years Too Late

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Ash Vs. Evil Dead Was Pretty Fun

I watched the first ep for free and was really happy with it.  The thing was funny and lightweight but not boring.  I guess I have a high tolerance for fake blood and comical decapitations, but I didn't find it especially gory or violent.  Really, fun is the perfect description.  It looked like they had fun making it, Bruce Campbell seemed really into it, and the audience was invited to share.  Nothing life-changing or cutting edge, but solid tee vee entertainment. 

It's Official: David Clarke Is The Dumbest Motherfucking Uncle Tom In America!

It's a tough call, but I think we can all agree--even compared to some of the other repellent Toms on Fox "News" and in the Republican party, David Clarke is the winner.  Clarke is THE BIGGEST Uncle Tom for the Fox Generation.  (And don't forget, Clarence "Uncle" Thomas and Juan Williams are still around!)  As a bonus, Clarke is a nasty little fascist creep as well, so there's that!

Holy Shit, Previously Embarrassingly Useless Jessica Tarlov Just Destroyed O'Reilly On His Own Show

O'Reilly was shouting some fascist insanity about hanging everyone over drugs and shit just like Singapore did, and Tarlov, who is a useless  Fox "News" "Democrat" stooge and employee of vile cocksucker Doug Schoen, came out with something along the lines of Australia got rid of guns to cure gun violence and we're not doing that in America so why the fuck would we start hanging everyone?  O'Reilly and that dumb bitch Andrea Tantaros both looked like they were going to cry, after which O'Reilly sputtered and stumbled and got the fuck out of that segment as fast as he could.

Fuck.

Nicely done, Ms. Tarlov.  Unexpectedly and unprecedentedly intelligent from you.  Keep it up.  Maybe next time ask O'Reilly whether we should hang wife beaters or perverts or child abusers from Long Island or people like that...

Kentucky Is A Teabagging Shithole And Jack Conway Is An Exceptional American Loser

Kentucky is a shithole, and fuck them, but why the hell did they nominate a fucking loser like Jack Conway?  Conway lost to Rand Fucking Paul and now he lost to ANOTHER retard teabagger.  I'm sure the idiots in the Kentucky Democratic party will nominate him to something else next time so he can lose again.  Or maybe that titanic idiot loser Alison Lundergan Grimes.  Fucking genius.

Fred Thompson Was A Right-Wing Piece Of Shit

Good riddance.  Too bad he didn't kick many decades ago.  Every time a nasty, right-wing shithead dies, the world becomes a better place.

Jesus Frakking Christ, Ralph Nader V Amanda Marcotte? AMANDA MARCOTTE?

We are fucking doomed.  Amanda Marcotte began her life as paid troll for John Edwards, and I'm pretty sure Ralph Nader's career as a troll may have followed a career of something more substantive.  Probably should look that up.  Then the welfare academia crowd--rock-ribbed entry-level protectors of the establishment in all its glory--get their undies in a wad because they hate Nader for all the most inane reasons--and probably because Nader enjoyed the benefits of an honestly elite education, and Nader's life probably worked out much as Nader always wanted.

Disagree with Nader all you want on the substance, but the knee-jerk, reactionary Democratic hate for Nader because Al Gore was an exceptional America loser and coward is just fucking sad.  Remember, plenty of suckers are big money so those fools can educate their kids at comically non-selective colleges and universities.  I mean, I'm sure they're very nice, but they're not, ya know, like, the best or brightest or anything.  Whether Nader is right or wrong on interest rates, Nader's a player and Amanda Marcotte and the welfare academia folks are water buffalo butt flies in comparison.

Acoustical Cube Of Sugar

Bobby's Kid Is A Fucking Moron

I know the Kennedy family has had lots of issues over the years, but surely Old Joe would have sliced his own nuts off a century ago if he had known it would come to this in 2015.  RFK, Jr. should feel nothing but shame for standing with the tinfoil hat crowd and pushing dangerous, anti-science bullshit like a gods-damned idiot tee vee comedian.  If Robert's last name was not Kennedy, he'd be able to spew his disgusting lies in obscurity, but with that besotted Kennedy name, that asshole can do some real harm.

Not Exactly Breaking News: Bill O'Reilly Is A Nasty, Addle-Headed Racist Motherfucker

But any decent human with more than one functioning brain cell knows what a vile piece of shit Bill O'Reilly is.  The sad thing is that O'Reilly gets paid yuge money to shout lies and insanity and racist hatred at our home-bound senile octogenarians and other exceptional American mental-defective teabaggers.  Those poor bastards DON'T have functional brains and DON'T know any better.

Supergirl Is Not As Frighteningly Awful As You Would Think

But gods damn, it is fucking dumb.  Dumb that they can't even say 'Superman'.  Dumb that they have a silly SHIELD/Torchwood/every other-stupid-thing-just-like-it dominating the plots.  Dumb that two related superpowered aliens on the same backward planet didn't even talk for 15 years.  Dumb that the planet is otherwise chock full of other superpowered alien baddies who just now start getting noticed.  Dumb that a young woman who flies around for a fun would wear a skirt as part of her super outfit--beware super winter bush.  Jesus.  Melissa Benoist is not exactly a compelling actor, but she's really good looking and sells the joyful, puppy-like goofiness in the show enough to make it work sorta.  Too bad about the goofy, though.  What would have been really cool was if the producers of the movies had the balls to make this tee vee Supergirl the movie Supergirl and have that idiot that plays Superman now appear in the show for a few minutes there and talk up some stupid hand-wavy reason why the two super kids don't work together but allow her to have a few minutes in a movie down the road.  The weak, no-saying-Superman junk really makes the show seem pointless.  Idk, I guess because the bar was so low and expectations so poor, the fact that it is not heinous makes Supergirl feel like a minor victory.

Did The Colts Carolina Game Start Late?

What the fuck?  Did they forget to change the clocks or something?  Did I?  They're just going into halftime now at 10 eastern.  The weather looks fucking nasty, too.  I guess anything that ends with a Colts loss is a win for America.

America's Police State Is Exceptional!

American exceptionalism is exceptional!  Isn't it odd that none of numerous presidential aspirants have any desire to talk about our exceptional American society in any realistic fashion?  Weird, dude.  Sanders probably comes the closest to hinting around reality, mostly in economics, but Sanders is a 100% establishment centrist, so he's not likely to be any resembling a radical crusader against societal violence and police abuses and whatnot.

That political reality doesn't change anything, though.  America is an insanely violent place, where children and minorities face daily state terrorism in so many frightening ways which do not at all apply to the vast majority of white people.  Unfortunately, those privileged white people are mostly not too fucking concerned with truth justice or the American way.  Terrorizing school children and racist police murder will continue to be as least as popular as NASCAR with the exceptional American teabaggers and Fox "News" viewers and their masters.  And until we get rid of the guns and disarm the local police, nothing is going to change. 

How Long Till Donald Trump Has Rinse Pubies' Head On A Pike?

Trump's in charge, so what does anyone need with Rice Pupaes Reek Poopies Rinse Pubies Reince Priebus Reince Priebus anymore?  Trump will approve the debates.  Trump will approve the schedules.  Trump will pick the veep.  The RNC chairman has been permanently castrated.

Poor Greasy Old Ben Stein Just Told The Truth About Taxes To Neil Cavuto

And I think Cavuto shit his pants right there on the tee vee.  "Very few" Americans paid the top tax rate during the 50s and very few would pay a significantly higher rate today.  Cavuto is not built to handle that sort of truth.  Reality, history, sanity, those things are liable to make Neil Cavuto burst a blood vessel in what passes for a brain in his skull.  As fun as that would be, somebody might be sad and actually miss having Cavuto around, or he's got a dumb puppy who likes him or something.  Probably don't look for Ben Stein as a special guest moderator at the Fox "Business" debate, though...

Republicans Are Bigger Candyasses Than Cops

Well, America has found exceptional cry babies bigger than our cops, and they are Republican presidential candidates.  If you can't handle boring old John Harwood, how the hell will you handle Putin or Satan or aliens or space aliens?  Republicans are always huge pussies, but these 2016 candidates are freekin' yuge!  CNBC is as way farther to the right than the usual rock-ribbed right-wing establishment media, so the Republican Party is either too stupid to deal with even mild doses of reality, or the Republican Party is using this horseshit to manipulate their idiot teabagger minions into even more astounding, strange far-away worlds of insanity.  Either way, America is getting exceptional dumber every second.

Vile Old Money Exceptional American Reactionary Loser John LeBoutillier

John LeBoutillier is a prime example of why any healthy society should obliterate their upper class on a regular basis.  He's an odious, reactionary imbecile who has never had a useful thought in his entire worthless life, spending his time sucking off the poor hopeless fools in the Republican party and appearing on Fox "News" recycling inanity for the meager pay of a right-wing pissboy.  Without the luck and benefit of a wealthy family, LeBoutillier surely would have spent his final moments choking on the rancid jizz of some scabrous junkie in a cardboard box under a bridge.

When This Shit Happens To Duke, At Home, It Is Nothing But Fucking Hilarious

Boo-fucking-hoo that none of the 19 penalties on the last play got called.  Whaaaaa!  Duke is such a shithole that Stanford looks honorable by comparison.  If Duke gets hosed by the universe, well, everybody wins!

Richard Dawkins Fisks Ben Carson

Hard.  Why aren't more people in America calling Carson a fucking moron?  He's a gods-damned, full-on, ocean-going lunatic, but because he was supposedly some kinda doctor, everybody pretends he's normal or something.  Each and every exceptional American with a voice should be screaming 24 hours a day about what a complete asshole nutjob Ben Carson is!

Complete Fucking Morons Shouldn't Breed

Jesus fucking christ.  Yeah, I know it's a dead old blog, but gods-dammit, there's so much fucking nasty and creepy shit here, from the atrocious, tacky tats on that fucking clown, to the dangerous and inexcusable anti-vax insanity, to the stupid fucking names.  Hethir?  Jaden?  Jericho Fury?  Let's hope to fuck the whole miserable family of fucking loser dipshit cocksuckers has died from an easily-preventable but extremely painful disease by now. 

If Ever There Was An Unfunny, No-Talent Kiss Ass Who Could Die In A Sleazy Motel With A Needle In His Arm For All Anyone Should Care

It's Jim Carrey!  And Jimmy Fallon!  Fallon is exactly what a no-talent shithead looks like, so really, he can go get that scuzzy needle and shoot up an eight-ball in some slimy motel and leave the good, funny people alone.

Too Bad About The Mets

Like the Blue Jays and David Price, the Mets were not good enough.  Fuckers.