Basic Canadians

John McNaughton: Finger-Painting Corn Cob

Time to delete your account you creepy racist fuckstain.  The timeline is not kind to that idiot and his risible revanchist art project.

Kevin Sorbo, Intellectual Powerhouse

There's not a boot anywhere Kevin Sorbo won't lick!  That guy's a real freeking genius, and all MAGA-Americans should be thanking jesus fucking christ that we have people like him out there telling the truth to the libturds, libtards, and libcunts everywhere!  Thanks, Trump.

Never Ever A Shortage Of Basic White Kids

Steve Goldstein, MarketWatch Genius And Corn Cob, Delete Your Account

Sweet fucking jesus on a popsicle stick, let's watch Steve Goldstein get unmanned by subtraction.  But, it's not easy being a teabagging fuckface and full-time reactionary pissboy!  It's not!!  That's not gonna stop the brutal drive-by fiskings, tho...

Fox "News" Is The Dumbest Place On Earth--And There's That $32T Headline Again

Fox "News" will never stop making conservative assholes dumber by the minute.  And yet another bullshit headline screaming about a number that doesn't mean anything unless you explain it is a major savings.  Sad.

Excellent Health Care Article By Matt Bruenig And Hilarious Auto-Fisking By The Cocksuckers At The Mercatus Center

Saves a fucking metric shit ton of money, AND makes the Koch-funded Mercatus Center look like fucking commies.  This is good shit.  Covering everyone, eliminating out of pocket expenses, and all that is even better!  Matt Bruenig mirrors himself at Jacobin, too, and sees he made a mistake as the savings is $205 billion a year. Sweet.

And why are we talking about this shit now, out in the open and not just at DSA meetings or in some basement somewhere?  Who did this, besides the many many thousands of good men and women working on this shit for the last 100 years?  That cranky old Jew from Vermont?  You betcha!  Godsdamn, that Bernie Sanders is a smart fucking guy.  And he would have beaten Trump.

Outland

Not-Froome Wins And The Motherfucking Frogs Are Thanking Motherfucking Jesus

A Welshman!  Who knew?  That's a win for the Frogs who don't have to put Froome up there with Merckx, Anquetil, Hinault, and Indurain. 

Rox

Everest To NYC

Excellent longer-form gossip kids thing about a Sherpa in NY.  What could be a greater story than the life and death struggle to survive in an inhospitable hell?

Mainstream Republicans Believe That A Black Eye Means Satan Stole Your Soul

Screaming religious fundamentalist losers, like the ISIS and Pat Robertson, believe that black eyes are a sigh Satan stole your soul.  And they don't mean your KIA.  How the fuck can we allow morons like this to participate in our society.  Why haven't we removed every single one of these reactionary racist Republicans numbskulls?

Heart While

Better Than Bad

Turners

Outed

Find A Brother Who Makes Michael Harriot Look Good?

Easy.  Unhinged fucking bullshit reactionary fuckbrains can be black guys, too.

Gossip Kid Michael Harriot Is Suddenly Very Sick Of All That Fucking Winning

Whoops.  Harriot got a solid drive-by fisking from Greenwald.  I guess the gossip kids should shut the fuck up about this loony horseshit.

Girlz Talk

Anybody But Froome Wins Big For The Tour

The prayers were answered, and nobody has to talk about Froome being the greatest champion.  The Tour will be so much better off now; even if Sky wins, anybody but Froome was the real victor.  Seems like karma might finally be catching up to Froome in general, so that's something.  And good on Patrick Redford being the gym-class gossip kid on the cycling beat.

Imani Gandy Will Always Be The Dumbest Foreclosure Lawyer

Every time that angry black dipshit opens her yap, she gets owned by someone!  Gandy can't help being a fucking reactionary fuckbrain.  She did help banks foreclose on people, after all.

Has There Ever Been A Fatuous Reactionary Dolt As Wrong About Everything As Cal Thomas?

Cal Thomas, creepy even to pedophiles, has somehow managed to fail at being a successful, first-division establishment Republican pissboy.  Not that he won't keep trying.  What he laughingly calls "socialism" is considered boring and obvious center-right practicality in every other civilized society.  In comparison to Cal Thomas, screaming lunatics and deranged shiteaters sound like M.I.T. scholarship winners.

Redz

Black Gossip Kid Michael Harriot Is Unhinged

He actually says Soviet at one point. Soviet! Fucking brilliant.  Anywho, gossip kids can tend to be fucking idiots and Michael Harriot is certainly that.  When looking for people changing votes in porous voting machines and removing voters from rolls and creating voter ID laws and gerrymandering districts, well, they ain't Soviets.  Asshole.

7UPS

Excellent Abortion Primer From Self

Excellent first thing to read if you are having an abortion.  More please.

Brew Nomance

Even The Crispiest Hop-Head Is Not As Brain Dead As Julie Schauer

Fucking screaming asswipes like this could make you want to get wicked high!

Rick Newman Is Too Stupid To Even Be A Good Conservative Pissboy

Being a pissboy is too hard for that dumb bastard.  But Newman will continue to suck the dicks of the pissboys for a paycheck, so there's that.

Charles Koch Foundation Cato Institute, Delete Your Account

Sweet fucking jesus christo shitsnacks, that's the sort of drive-by fisking that will leave a mark.  The Charles Koch Foundation Cato Institute should probably just sit there in a pile of their own shit and be quiet.

Come On, Fucker!

Watch For Sec And You Can See Virginia Kruter Turning Into A Corn Cob

Jesus motherfrakking christ on a pogo stick, conservatives are dumb as rocks.  And Kruta seems like an especially rocky rock.  I guess it's good all these weird little conservative creeps are too stupid to any more damage than they already are.

1988 Chris Kvale

As seen for sale on that shitty auction site.  Odd geo and paint color choice; the silver needs more pop, but it may be faded after 30 years.  Like the maroon color tho.

Of Course The Gossip Kids Delivered The Dumbest Review Of The Hella Dumb Interstellar

Fatal flaw of the gossip kids: they're idiots.  Interstellar was so wicked hard sciencey science realistic science shit except for the part where the universe runs on lurve, so in the end the flick was just a dumbed-down Event Horizon without the latter film's charm.  Kip Thorne musta been prouda that.

Political Song for Atrios to Sing

Apply Now You Sick Fucks: That Michelle Wolf Ice-Is Bit Was Good

Weird, Fat, Bald, Incel Beta Cuck Loser Matt Forney: Chronic Masturbator, Perpetual Virgin, And Bed-Wetter Still Sucks Major Ass

Matt Forney is probably a bigger loser than Al Giordano!  And he's still fat and bald and the world's biggest pussy.  I can't believe some young hottie college cheerleader type has a snatched this guy up!

Perspective On Russia Not Allowed!

As signal-boosted by Greenwald, the shouting from the car windows about official American attitudes about election meddling should be atop everyone's priority list.  Russia is not capable of being America's enemy unless we make it one.  Now why would we want to do that??

Fiskin'

Dan Coats, Pathetic Beta Cuck Pissboy, Sick Of Winning

So much winning for the weak little Dan Coats.  Trump hires only the best people.  All the best people.  Thanks, Trump.

Season Of The Rose

Pathetic Bed-Wetting Right-Wing Incel Jerk-Offs Will Always Be The Funniest Fucking Shit On Earth

These chronic masturbators are the last joys sane people have left for them.  We get to point and laugh at their impotent insanity and find a bit of light in our day.

Fatuous Right-Wing TV Whore Kimberly Guilfoyle Newsom Scaramucci Trump Getting Pretty Sick Of All That Fucking Winning

So much motherfrakking winning that it starts to look like losing!  Sad tee vee stooge and creepy reactionary washerwoman Kimberly Guilfoyle Newsom Scaramucci Trump is a perfect addition to the orange shitgibbon's family parade of slatterns.

Loony Catholic Bigots Are Just As Evil As Insane Evangelical Cocksuckers

Homophobic assholes are evil whether they pretend to be Catholic, christian, muslim, jewish.  Nobody cares about these wretched little haters, but every small-minded bigot out there is searching for the reason they are better than the other reactionary shitstains.  They're all simply hate-filled creeps.  And they're all usually flaming closet-cases as well.

Atrios Being So Fucking Done With The Obama Fluffers Is Pretty Fucking Amusing

Herr Doktor Professor Duncan will not abide Obama pissboys.  But oh my lordy, the neoliberal establishment still luvs them some Obammy.  I wonder when Atrios will start slagging the welfare academia clowns like Scott Lemieux and Erik Loomis, purported leftish bloviators who always seem to somehow wind up on the side of the status quo.

Moony

Lots Of Twit Love For That Vile Dead Felon Jack Brunk

Pretty fucking gross, considering that Brunk was a fucking bigtime felon.  It's nice that he had a bike habit--a habit he funded through healthcare fraud and other felonies.  The twits are not very bright and nasty as fuck.

Limey Gossip Kid With A Shout-Out To The Limey's NHS

The NHS is saving lives despite the vile Tory cunts and their evil budget cuts.  This is the sort of shit more dimwit-Americans should hear, so good on the gossip kids for boosting teh signal.

If This Song Is Your Life, You Are Good

Creepy Shitstain Papa John Shittner Is Really Fucking Sick Of So Much Motherfucking Winning

This shitty pizza asshole was hated by everyone, and every single person on the fucking planet was just waiting for the chance to shit all over Papa John.  That tells you something.  Something hilarious.  Papa John and Herman Cain really deserve each other, so we should fire them both into the sun.

1 Is

Twits V Mountain Lion

Mountain lions aren't spotted, but those aren't spots.  And the shape is right.  Hungry female mountain lion, from the looks of it.  Luckily for twits, they taste like shit.

Downside

American Xceptionalizm

Life for most Americans has been getting harder for 50 years.  The only winners have been the very few, but that bullshit does not excuse racist fuckbrains, aka Republicans, being Republicans and voting for Republicans, Trump included, even if it partly explains it.  There's no reason for America to be this stupid, except that most Americans are helplessly imbecilic fucktards.  And the fact that the conservative establishment has been working for the last 50 years to make sure the majority of Americans were as dumb, scared, hateful, racist, and paranoid as possible.

Starz N Barz

Elite Boarding Schools Nurture Conservatives The Way They Nuture Sexual Predators With STDs

Both are vile and disgusting.  The cohort of smart, decent students at any elite boarding school is painfully small, but they're there doing what only they can do, so even though Andover and Choate and Deerfield are full of nasty creeps, they're better than Greenwich High or New Trier or Stuyvesant.

Summer Sounds

Proud Boys Redefine Beta Cuck Loser For The Next 1000 Years

The best part is when the Proud Boy's mom has to tell him it's time to go home.  Fucking genius.  Antifa has always been the best of humanity, and it is lovely to see them fighting against the racist right-wing fuckers, especially when they're risible Proud Boy creeps.

Kissis

Cobbles!

Meanwhile, the racing has started, and the cobblestones have made some problems.  Nice to see that the Tour is actively trying to make something happen before the big climbs.

France!

The Frogs win the cup.  No joy for Croatia.  Belgium third.  But no Krauts or Limeys or cocksucking Russians, so that's something.  Let the greasy Frenchmen have their fucking victory.

It Grrrlz

Without Rick Lyman, Where Do New Choaties Get Their Herpes?

Even crazed right-wing libertarian idiots wonder what life is like for Choaties now without Rick Lyman to deliver the herpes to them.  This is important shit.  Tradition is very important at elitist institutions like Andover and Choate.  You pay for privilege.  Just like Ivanka Trump!

That Vile Cunt Trump And That Vile Cunt The Queen Deserve Each Other

Both of those cunts are horrible right-wing racist fuckbags, and they deserve an eternity in their own personal hell with no company but each other. 

Incisive Analysis From Your Friendly Neighborhood Over-Privileged Twits

This shit is so tiresome, but what else do we have.  Jan Brady Heine is not exactly a genius, and this shit has been understood by some for a couple of decades now, but somehow the twits make everything so futile.

If Glenn Greenwald Makes A Point, Will A Dem Hear It?

No. No they will not.  The Dems are almost as deranged as the GOP, but the unfortunate truth is that the GOP must be eradicated before the Dems can be dealt with, so, fucked and whatnot.

Demented Right-Wing Cylons Will Always Be Funny And Sad

Deranged racist reactionary bullshit is all the right wing has left, but there's absolutely nothing wrong with pointing and laughing at the fools smearing their own shit all over themselves.

Political Song for Theresa May to Sing

Summer Fun

That Fucking Trump Baby Balloon Is Going To Look Great Flying All Over America This Fall

Every fucking Dem candidate should make sure that motherfucker is there flying free at every campaign event.  Trump hates that shit, and it will drive him fucking bonkers!

Theresa May Is Even More Sick Of All That Winning Now

Thanks, Trump!  That poor stupid Limey Theresa May let Trump skull fuck her in the gods-damned Sun of all places, and she had take it with a smile and beg for it up her ass next while the entire world laughed at her.  This is some fun shit, because if anybody in the world deserves to be fucked over by a senile orange shitgibbon, well, a blithering moronic Tory PM would be pretty much number fucking one.

One Would Hope Sam Wang Would Be Smart Enough To Not Have Anything To Do With A Fatuous Cockbag Like Kurt Eichenwald, But...

Every place like Princeton seems so amazing until you actually go to Princeton...Anywho, Sam Wang is not bright enough to know what a fucking loon Kurt Eichenwald is, and I guess that says pretty much everything Sam Wang would not like said about Sam Wang.  Establishment is as establishment does, and Princeton is first and foremost a credentialing institution for the establishment.  After that shit, Wang plays smart guy running the numbers on the midterm elections and sees the blue wave.

Glory Us

Twits Discover Aerolite Pedals

Timely!  There's nothing hi-tek those fellers aren't all over!

Lite Cake

Good Gossip Kid, Black Section, Michael Harriot On Haiti

This is a good primer on the walking, talking imperial atrocity that is Haiti.  Like so much of the fun stuff we see all over, the USA has been utterly evil in its relations with Haiti and the cause of most of the shit the Haitian people have endured and continue to endure today.  When in doubt, the USA will ruin anything it can't own outright, and Haiti was the one place that wouldn't be so easily purchased. 

Theresa Bonopartis Is Another Lying Cunt In The Federalist--Hey! Who Funds The Federalist?

Lying cunt alert! Lying cunt alert! The Federalist! Plagiarism!  This bloated loon Theresa Bonopartis tries to convince other morons that abortion causes some lasting effect, but since it is the Federalist, we know they are fucking vile right-wing racists, liars, and plagiarists.

Who funds the Federalist, anyway?

Paul Manafort Is Also A Very Stable Genius

Who is too stupid to keep his mouth shut.  Fortunately for the comedy fans out there, the judge didn't let have a do-over on his request for a transfer out of his luxury jail cell and sent him to Alexandria, VA.  I hope Manafort winds up with the same treatment Chelsea Manning got.

HamNo Gets It, Atmo, And So Should You

Pretty fucking simple, obvious, but most of the asswipes out there don't see it.  Of course, most Americans regardless of any party affiliation are utter fucking morons while HamNo is like the Gene Debs of the gossip kids.

Political Song for ICE to Sing

Gossip Kids Dragging Loony Fascist Elon Musk Is The Best Of America In 2018

Musk is far too daffy to be a Bond villain, but he's an asshole of titanic proportions, so seeing the Gossip Kids, who should be his faithful minions, dragging his sorry ass is pretty fucking amusing.  Rock on, Gossip Kids!

Who Woulda Thought That A Female Evan Dando Would Be The Worst Fucking Idea In The History Of The Universe

Jim Jordan Knows Wrestling Is 100% Totally Not The Gayest Fucking Thing Ever

Def not gay.  Just because guys would yank their tools while watching the wrestlers work out and shower--and then fuck each other after the wrestlers had left--that does not make wrestling gay at all.  Fuck no!  Jim Jordan is a 100% all man and not another in the endless parade of conservative closet cases.  No way!

Pop History From Some Reactionary Limey Doofs

Croatia's Not A Real Country, But Anything Is Better Than The Motherfucking Limey Cocksuckers

Let Croatia play the Frogs for their gay little soccer prize; as long as there are no Krauts, Russians, Limeys, greaseballs, we're good.  I would have preferred to see an African team or Mexico, maybe Iran, win the thing, but whatever.

Croatia's fine.  I'm sure they're very nice.

Doug Schoen Sucks Moose Cock

Fox "News" "Democrat" Doug Schoen is a fatuous shitstain, so nobody with any sense listens to him at all, but maybe, just maybe, somebody can explain to Doug that what he calls a "socialist agenda" is considered practical center-right policy by even the most stridently idiotic right-wing governments in the rest of the civilized world.  I know that the racist troglodytes who pay Schoen's salary are too ignorant to know anything, but they count on Doug being dumber than a cat turd.  That's not right.

Faltline

Pro Tip: If You Are Ever Trapped Somewhere, Twits Will Not Be Any Use

Overprivileged twits make everything worse.  When the shit hits the fan, the shit will still be shit, so...

Girl Gossip Kids And Steel Panther Cannot Exist Together In The Same Dimension

Probably just as well!  Steel Panther is a one-joke act that gets tired very fast, and the girl gossip kids are not up to the fake hair metal aesthetic.  Some things simply do not go together. 

Her Fav Froots

No Sane Person Should Be Surprised That Russian State TV Is Better At Reporting The News Than American State TV

Our establishment media propagandists are notoriously stupid and incompetent.  Nobody should be shocked that the fucking Russians did it better without ever even trying.  Ed Schultz believed it, and he lived it, so, that's not nothing.

Never Forget That Sally Pipes Is A Vile Cunt Who Gets Paid To Lie About Universal Healthcare In Order To Preserve Industry Profits

Say it over and over again: SALLY PIPES IS A LYING CUNT!  She is a liar and she is a cunt.  National universal health care coverage will cost somewhere around half of all current health care spending, saving everyone in the US a shit ton of money while covering everyone--and conveniently ending the bloated salaries of every single health care industry executive--so Pipes and her lie machine are really just spewing horseshit because they know the health care industry will soon go extinct.  So fuck her in her eye holes now while you have the chance. 

That and Forbes is the legacy of a fabulous closet case Malcolm Forbes, so I'm sure Steve Forbes is very proud and very fabulously closeted himself.

Whoever The Fuck This Lying Cunt Saritha Prabhu Is, She Was Always A Right-Wing Shitbag

And never really a Democrat.  Nobody who writes for noted plagiarist and racist, revanchist fabulist Ben Domench-McCain's hateful GOP outlet the Federalist is any sort of Democrat or liberal or anything sane or decent.  And any reactionary fuckstick who believes the political center in the United States is somewhere between the Dems and GOP is too fucking demented to be left to wander civilized society.  She's so upset by the mean things people say about Trump, but somehow is not at all incensed by the disgusting conservative evil promulgated by the GOP and the Trumptards.  Interdasting.  Screaming right-wing morons always screech that the party left them, which is always horseshit.  Whatever other kind of shitbird she is, this Prabhu asshole was always a conservative dullard, and she is today.

Angsty Teen

As Long As Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez Keeps The Proper Enemies

She will be fine.  The Dems hate her and this is a good thing.  The GOP fears her and this is a better thing.  When she gives in and sells out and takes her place in establishment, well, it will be time for a better woman to take her place.

Ramones Come Alive

Alex Pareene Is Obvious: Haim Saban Sucks Monkey Balls

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.

Are These Vile And Creepy Canadians A Sex Cult, Too?

This looks really gross and that guy is def a fucking creepster.  Nasty right-wing fuckers are always horrible sex perverts as well.

Doubt Less

Chris Froome Is An Ass-Cancer On The Tour

Froome's not going away.  No matter what.  And he's not going to crash out.  So if Team Sky can pull off another win for Froome, the Tour will be stricken with the worst case of ass-cancer since Lance Armstrong was racing.

Recent Jen Trynin Thing, Book And Whatnot

Jen Trynin turned her rock and roll adventure into a pretty decent book, apparently.  Naturally, the book way underperformed as well, but that's racing.

Boppin'

Scott Pruitt, So Motherfucking Sick Of All That Winning

So. Much. Fucking. Winning.  How much more winning can Scott Pruitt take?  Everyone's a winner with Trump!  Heh, indeedy. 

In Order To Be A Conservative, You Must Be A Mental-Defective

Conservative, racist, violent, guntard, hateful, disgusting, require you to be far dumber than average.  If you have any mental capacity at all, eventually you will see just how pathetic you are, but conservatives lack that ability.  They're all painfully stupid.

Nick Stauff Is What A Beta Cuck Right-Wing Closet Case Corn Cob Looks Like

Literally.  This guy is a fucking nimrod.  But he's a perfect Trumptard rock-ribbed racist GOP cannon-fodder sort of idiot.  So there's that.

Ed Schultz Got A Gig On MSNBC And Defended Working People Against The Rest Of MSNBC

That's not nothing.  Like Olbermann and Limbaugh, Schultz came from a sports background, and he was also a Republican until that gig turned to shit.  But when he got his shot on the tee vee, he did do something to stand with working Americans against the neoliberal shitbags who are the political and media establishment.  Better than anyone currently on MSNBC.

Jim Jordan: Sick Of Winning Or Closet Case? Why Not Both!

I'm sorry, wrestling is the gayest fucking sport. It couldn't be more gay if they still did it nude and oiled. None more gay.  Anywho, soon-to-be-ex Congressman Jim Jordan suddenly is getting really fucking sick of all that winning!  Dennis Hastert, Joe Paterno, Senator Tappy McWidestance, and most every other Republican can give Jordan some sound advice for his live-boy situation. 

3T Strada Gooch

Nothing like a clumsy kludge.  Road racing is hard enough without having your components suck as hard as that 1X shit has so far.  Another Sram triumph.  Heh, indeedy.

Hay Babby Its The Fourtha July

Years Ago Tomorrow

Rod Dreher Gets A Better Fisking Than He Deserves

Dreher's one smart cookie.  The Gossip Kids' Ladies' Auxiliary drags that sorry fucker without mercy over his completey bugfuck insane christian conservative inanity.  It's a fun fisking--way more fun than Dreher himself could ever be.

Glenn Greenwald Signal-Boosting The Beautiful Brutal Worldwide Fisking Of Cowardly Cunt Tunessa Talley

When this disgusting violent cretin Tunessa Talley dies a wonderfully painful and ignominious death, the world will rejoice!  Greenwald is boosting a vicious and wonderful fisking of that vile right-wing slag Talley.  Moar!

Houses Of The Wholely

Dotard 4 Dotards

They had some fun with this.  Everybody deserves a little fun.  And let's not pretend that dotard isn't so much more fun because it also calls out retard and fucktard every time someone uses it for Trump.  Heh indeedy.

Hey, Who DOES Fund The Federalist?

Cuz that gay fucking website sure does spout a shit ton of violent, fascist, revanchist, nationalist, evil, conservative, racist right-wing bullshit, and I'm pretty sure Ben Domenech-McCain doesn't have any money of his own as he's a fucking moronic plagiarist asshole.  So where does the money for The Federalist come from?

Who funds The Federalist?

Starrted

Eugene Robinson: Good

Good.  It's the Post, but Robinson is correct anyway.  The Dems should be playing to win this election.  Of course...

Raging Against Machines

Abolishing ICE Is Another Easy Winner For The Dems If They Had The Balls To Run With It

Which is why establishment conservatives and other racist GOP motherfuckers hate the idea so much.  The Dems are--or could be, easily--on the side of every obvious, insanely popular, centrist policy position in American politics: healthcare, women's rights, reproductive rights, immigration, police reform, minimum wage, unions, social security, gun control, taxes, the list goes on forever, but they are such cowards beholden to the same masters as the the GOP side of the establishment.  Until more Dems run with balls and strike out on their own back to the center, well, we're all fucked.

John Dolan Is Another Racist Conservative Cocksucker Too Stupid To Be A Corn Cob

Stupid and nasty go hand in hand if you're conservative.  This fucking dipshit is an especially creepy little turd.

Kentucky Is A Shitty Place

Gotta say that they're getting exactly what they deserve, but that doesn't mean that their cocksucking governor is not an evil racist shitbag.  Matt Bevin should get sodomized by the courts over this as he apparently doesn't have the power to cancel benefits like that, but nobody should count on the courts for anything in America anymore.  Let's see if the reactionary racist fuckwads in KY actually vote for decent people this November. 

All-Amerikkkan Jesuses

David Price, Yankee Killer

Heh indeedy.  Price is such a piece of shit, but all in all, he's the perfect Red Sox player. 

Houseless