Not Jung Enough

Bill Kristol Needs Professional Help

Rehab for whatever greasy junk he's been shooting into his eyeballs.  Poor lil' Bill is crying out for help, and it is about time Kristol gets exactly what he deserves.  Without Irving, Bill Kristol would be the creepy slow-witted custodian at a crumbling New Jersey middle school masturbating into lockers after hours.

Why Are We Getting The Rio Olympics AND Trump In The Same Year?

Why the fuck can't we spread out our hilariously entertaining international disasters a little?  The Olympics in Rio will be a shit show--literally--and Trump's campaign will be even shittier, but good gods, why the fuck must we have them both in the same year?  We need our fun, we need our high-calorie entertainment, but let's take our time.  Our lives would be so much more wonderful if we could make all this fun last...

Pretty Good Day On 'Lawyers Guns & Money'

I get on those clowns quite a bit, but they are widely read and have legions of followers, so when they have a good day, it's not just good for their establishment-loving acolytes.  Starting with this, 31 May 2016 was a legit good day in the annals of welfare academia on the interweb tubes.  Yee fucking haw.

Hamilton Nolan Does Not Get It On Universal Basic Income, Atmo

The Times piece has been getting savaged, and that's fine, just fine, and proper, but the takeaway from Hamilton Nolan is that he is not the biggest dipshit on the planet or anything, but it often seems like he's never thought about shit like this before.  That's odd, considering what he does for a living.  UBI should and would replace most social welfare and social insurance programs, as it would be the most efficient way to deliver money to the poorest citizens and into the economy, as long as we have proper universal healthcare and a living wage in place.  There's no reason for Social Security if you get your UBI for life--not that a program such as Social Security couldn't exist along with UBI, but it must not be necessary.  If you need your SS and your UBI to retire, then the UBI is not sufficient.  Plus the UBI should certainly be universal.  That way it is an incentive to work, as the folks who are working shit jobs and have UBI are doing a shit ton better than the ones deciding to scrape by on the UBI cuz they're unrecognized geniuses or addicts or just fuckin' lazy.  At higher and higher incomes, the UBI would be reabsorbed into the treasury by marginal tax rates, so we could have UBI for everyone and get most of it back pretty easily from the obscenely wealthy who won't even notice.

I think Nolan is on the right side of this, but he's gotta get out and about a bit more to get a wider and deeper understanding of issues like UBI.  Till then, he's gonna look stooge when this sorta shit comes up.

Your World Is Lousy With Nasty Fools

Like this asshole.  Serious, true-believer, fundamentalist christians are just as fucking dangerous and stupid as true-believer, fundamentalist Muslims and Jews and Mormons and everyone else.  These creeps are enemies of decency, freedom, and everything good in the world.  Their time is past, and it is way past time that we stop indulging these vile bastards.

Libertarian Shit Show Not Really Coming To A Town Near You

Gary Johnson ain't gonna be president.  And he ain't gonna stop Trump.  In fact, the most Johnson and his idiot partner will do is give the fools in the media something to do besides talk about how much they despise Hillary Clinton and how much they love how Trump is shaking up American politics.  The Libertarians are all ass clowns anyway.  Their risible ideas of freedumb just happen to have outsized benefits for a specific group--and that ain't the exceptional American common man. 

Soft Headed Inanity From The Idiots In Our Esablishment Media Village

Yes, the scary, scary Green Party is gonna cost Queen Hillary her crown! Oh noes!  Or maybe it's simply that the ass clowns who take up space in the media need dumb stories to tell themselves and waste time for the rest of us.

Yer Old School

Fuck Trump, That Beercan Pyramid Makes America Great Again

Beer day in Cleveland will be better than the Trump convention, too.  But at least now we know that there's still some creative spirit in America because for a few minutes we had our own pyramid. 

Flyin' The V

Political Song for Obama to Sing

Did Susana Martinez Pass The Veep Spot Back To Kasich?

Susana Martinez decided she likes the sauce way more than she likes Trump, so Trump did the only logical thing and took a greasy shit all over her right there in her home state.  So that means Trump is prolly gonna get stuck with that repellent loser Kasich as his VP pick.  It ain't gonna be Piyush.  Or Moby's Dick.  Or crazy-eyes from SC.  A Senator would be less than ideal, but Trump's not too sharp, so...

Making Howard Dean Look Like A Sooper Genius

Is wicked fucking easy.  If Dean stops liking money, he should be installed as the head of the DNC for life.  For a rock-ribbed establishment Dem, Dean has a pretty good idea of how to win.  Dean would find a way to turn Bernie Sanders and his voters into a deadly weapon against Trump, but the poor, brainless Obama fluffers and fatuous scumsuckers like Debbie Wasserman Schultz are way too fucking useless to get it, atmo.  Dean should take one for the team and get back into thankless, annoying politics. 

So, How'd That Foolproof Plan To Stop Trump Work, National Review?

Cover date 15 Feb. 2016.

Heh, indeedy.

Round N Around

Trump Spectacular Anti-Climax

Trump's been the nominee since Iowa, whether the GOP elites wanted to admit it.  He was leading in polls within days of his announcement and was never not in front.  So, today he got 1237 delegates.  Whatevs.  He was always gonna be the nominee.  We might not always have been at war with Eastasia, but Trump was always going win the Republican nomination in 2016. 

Howard Dean Has Sanders Figured Out, But The Dumbest Obama Fluffers On Earth Can't Even Come Close To Doing That

Sure, Dean is a Clinton surrogate and is doing the smart thing and talking up Sanders, but Dean also realized that Sanders could be and, more importantly, should be an important weapon against Trump during the election.  He was on with Chris Hayes, doing everything he could to encourage Sanders and not alienate his supporters while still talking up Clinton.  Imagine!  The fluffers, though, those sorry, stupid motherfuckers are not up it, and they're all too busy jerking each other off to see what Dean can see.  Much like Elizabeth Warren, Bernie Sanders is perfectly positioned to devastate Trump.  If Hillary is half as smart as her addle-headed sycophants think, she sees this shit, too.  But, those sub-basement Dems are fucking too stupid to live. 

Did Fox "News" Really Fire That Poor Stupid Andrea Tantaros?

Apparently she's been gone for a while, but she seemed such a perfect specimen for Fox "News".  I guess when she quit banging Ailes' kid or Murdoch's kid or whoever she was fucking in the family, she became expendable.

Wait. Hillary Is A Tireless Defender Of Labor?

Jesus christ, that's inane.  Since when has Hillary been a friend to labor?  What makes anyone believe she won't sell out completely and with gusto to her backers who also happen to be the avowed enemy of organized labor?  Just cuz you say Hillary might not be as fucking asinine as Donald Trump doesn't mean that Hillary is anything other than an atrocity.  Isn't Erik Loomis supposed to be a labor historian or some shit like that?  Fuck.

World O Tilt

Chris Kyle: American Psycho And Exceptional Liar

No shit.  Considering what a fucking nutcase Kyle was all along, it should come as no surprise that he lied about his military medals the same way he lied about everything else.  Chris Kyle was the worst of everything wrong with America, and the more everyone knows about this loathsome idiot, the better off we will all be.  He was no hero; anyone who considers Kyle a hero is below contempt.

Racist Idiots Have Always Been With Us And Always Will Be With Us

America is full of morons.  Conservatives are always wrong--and are almost always disgusting racist shitheads, too.  Our nation is doomed.

Elizabeth Warren Is Having Too Much Fun With Donald Trump

Ima gettin the feelin she don't like him much.  This is frikkin' genius, though.  If Warren is explicitly acting on behalf of the Clinton campaign, whoever recruited her for this should receive a fabulous cash prize.  If she's doing it on her own, Hillary's people should be paying wicked close attention and incorporating all this material into their campaign.  Baiting Trump is almost too easy, and there's a really good chance he'll flip out and say something astoundingly nasty sooner or later.  Small.  Money-grubber.  Weak.  Trump won't be able to deal with that shit.  Warren is enjoying herself, which is so important when you are destroying a bad man.

Excellent Gary Leupp On Petty Bigotry, Comical Ignorance, And Disgusting Political Manipulation

Leupp is right on target, and circles back to some history to finish it off.  Well done, and he's correct, of course.  But the Republicans fomenting vague gay panic and nasty bigotry against some of the most powerless citizens should be nothing but opportunity for the Dems.  Transgendered people are not any sort of threat to anyone, and if the Dems stood up for basic rights of transgendered people, they could leverage that into a defense of the rights of others, like women, poor people, scientists, workers, everyone.  The Republicans use this ploy often: gin up some hatred against some powerless minority to ramp up the enthusiasm and bring out the small-minded and ignorant haters in their voting base.  But this shit only works if nobody pushes back.  Have the Dems learned the lesson?  Have the Dems been standing up and pushing back hard against abortion restrictions?  Have the Dems been fighting for the rights of workers to organize and earn a living wage?  Have the Dems been campaigning hard and promising to reverse the vile voter suppression scheme pushed by the Republicans?  Thought so.

Pathetic Racist Shitstain Of The Day

America is exceptional, like an exceptionally overflowing septic tank.  I don't think we really wanna know just how many of these awful and repellent exceptional American racist dipshits are out there, but I have a feeling the Trump campaign is gonna give us a pretty good, and very sad and frightening, idea.

When Classic Rock Meets Jazz At Genius' Picnic

This Is A Best Thing On The Interweb Tubes

A thread sits for a year plus, then rockets off into some amazing info about John Klingberg and goes on for years.  Good job, TalkBass.  Wicked cool shit.  "Moondance" is simply a great song all-around with fabulous performances.  The bass work is fantastic.  Plus it manages to work in a gods-damned flute into what is essentially a jazz pop song--and flutes and jazz don't work usually.  And now more info about John Klingberg is on the internets, too.  Thanks, Obama.

I Hate This Way More Than I Should

In an era of Trump and Clinton, NRA terrorism, and everything else, this is no big deal, but jesus fucking christ.

It's Official: Ted Rall Gets It On Hillary Clinton, Atmo

Sounds good.  Most people will vote for Hillary, and she will be president--this was decided on election day 2012.  But not everybody is gonna get down in the slime with the Clintons another time in the 21st century, and that's fine.  If we ever we want to make politics better in this country, and if anybody wants to make a better Democratic Party, the USA is gonna have to spend the next eight years telling the truth about Hillary Clinton.  What are the chances of that?

Future President Trump Will Finally Solve That Vince Foster Case!

And World Nut Daily and the biggest of the nuts Jerome Corsi will be there to document the revelation!!  Thank the fucking gods!  Finally Vince Foster will get to rest in peace.  Detective Trump is on the case, and Bill and Hillary Clinton will finally be brought to justice!

Straightforward Hillary Clinton Fisking

Why not Hillary, indeed.  Clinton is a piece of shit and she will be a terrible president.  She will be a step back from even Obama and will be noticeably worse than Bernie Sanders would have been.  Only the dimmest of the piss boys would disagree.  The fact that Clinton would be and will be better than Trump or Jeb Bush or Ted Cruz would have been doesn't change the fact that she is a fucking complete garbage person and not what America needs now or ever.  That's reality, but she will be the POTUS, and we will have to do the best we can with that shit.

I Wonder If Ed Henry Will Be On Fox "News" Covering Bill O'Reilly's Lawsuit Against His Ex-Wife?

CNN?  Would be a gods-damned shame if Ed Henry did not get into the fun covering O'Reilly's latest courthouse adventure, especially if any of the Andrea Mackris, child custody, and chokey stair-dragging funfetti gets stirred up again!

Fun With The First Star Trek Movie

Weirdly long and unfocused and inexcusably cheesy in places, Star Trek: The Motion Picture was still so much fucking better than those toxic turds J.J. Abrams cranked out.

Better Feel

Bernie Sanders Festively Fucks With Debbie Wasserman Schultz

Nicely done, Senator Sanders.  There's Bernie helping in a down-ballot race.  Wasserman Schultz is a fucking garbage person, so replacing her with any asshole with a D after their name would pretty much have to be a remarkable improvement.  Tim Canova will have a hard time displacing the current DNC chief in the primary, but at least Sanders is showing that he is in fact a professional politician and not some groundless dreamer and dilettante; if only Sanders' pragmatic, center-left, popular, solidly-American policies and positions on things like education and taxes and health care had been covered with the respect given to the insane, dangerous, right-wing ideas favored by Hillary Clinton and most of the Democratic and Republican parties. 

When You Gleefully Carry The Piss Bucket, You Also Drink Deep With Relish

Whiny pissboys of welfare academia say shut up shut up shut up about Hillary. Wahhhhhhhhhhh.  No disloyalty will be tolerated.  The establishment must never be challenged.  Hillary Clinton captured the Dem establishment years ago, and she will in all likelihood be POTUS in 2017.  But does that mean Jill Stein is wrong about her?  In any way?  Does attacking Jill Stein or Ralph Nader or Bernie Sanders change the fundamental truth about Clinton?  Or does it simply make the small, powerless little boys and girls licking up the runoff at the fringes of Democratic Party respectability and their captive toadies feel better about their miserable existences?

Obama Overtime: Good Thing Yes

A small step, yes, a minor improvement, but nonetheless important progress.  Even better than the slight possibility of more money for some folks and more jobs for others, the bestest thing about the new rule is that loathsome conservative shitstains fucking hate it!  When those fatuous scumbags, who are absolutely always wrong every time about everything, hate something, it is 100% the right thing to do.  Thanks, Obama.

Of Course Trump Is Not Anywhere Near As Rich As He Claims

Trump is a self-absorbed fantasist, and his world-class fabulous wealth is not reality.  Trump is a rich guy, because he had an inherited fortune to squander on eastern European models and third-rate actresses, but he is not rich guy the way a real billionaire is a rich guy.  Slowly squandering his inheritance is not the lifestyle of a robber-billionaire, and Trump does not want the folks out there to understand that.  Trump probably would have more money today if he had taken his inheritance and invested in Vanguard index funds; whatever deals Trump has made over the years cost him money. 

Donald Trump the presidential candidate has so many hilarious weaknesses that we might be in for the most entertaining election cycle ever if the Dems are actually up to winning bigtime.  Let's hope.

Watching Scott Van Pelt And Trevor Noah Butcher Their TV Shows

All you can ask is whether those two clowns were really the best those tee vee operations could do?  Van Pelt is a gods-damned zero.  Whoever thought he was going to bring ESPN highlight shows back to the glory days of the Olbermann and Patrick was fucking high.  And Trevor Noah is as unfunny and tedious a comedy news show host as could be found in this or any nearby galaxy.  Jon Stewart was pretty soft headed and certainly weak sauce, but compared to Noah, Stewart was Mark Fucking Twain.  How the fuck did those two talentless hacks Van Pelt and Noah get on the fucking air?  Jesus.

Thinning The Herd = Killing Children With Guns

Evolution at work, but that doesn't make it right.  Karma, justice, basic human decency demand that the adult guntards kill themselves with their pathetic penis substitutes and leave their children to grow up in a better world, a world without guns and without their vile, dangerously violent and racist parents.

Conservative Are Racists And Dangerously Ignorant

Conservatives are too stupid to do anything properly, not just national security.  Conservatives cannot run a country or order lunch without fucking it up, so do yourself a favor and purge all conservatives from your existence with extreme prejudice. 

Conservatives Are Still Idiots, And The Federalist Is America's Most Unsanitary Toilet Paper

The whiny butt-hurt is frakking lovely.  Conservatives are only good as targets for our laughter. 

Conservatives Are Idiots, Trump Is Their King, And Jonah Goldberg Is Their Court Jester

There are many blind, asthmatic pug dogs in America who understand more about basic scientific concepts than Jonah Goldberg.  Goldberg hates everyone who is smarter and more accomplished than he is, so that's at least 100% of the human race.  When it comes time to decide who is lying about climate, anyone listening to Jonah Goldberg clearly has Donald Trumpian-levels of psychotic delusion bubbling around their rock heads--in other words, all the Republicans, teabaggers, libertarians, other fuckheads out there in our exceptional America.

Autochrist

'The Farce Awakens' Doesn't Hold Up At All

When I saw the flick in the theatre, I figured I'd go back, but somehow always had something better to do.  Now that it's out for home viewing, I watched it again, but jesus, the thing was pretty fucking tedious.  There were whole sections, including the Han Solo death, that I just fast-forwarded right through cuz who fucking cares.  The film has no surprises whatsoever and surprisingly little entertainment value considering its length and box office.  Seriously, the only person who got what they wanted out that mess was Harrison Ford.  Everybody else should have felt vaguely or specifically cheated, but it doesn't seem so.  J.J. Abrams is a fucking turd.  The movie certainly did what it had to do as far as reestablishing the viability of the brand, but it was a little disheartening to discover how little there there was there.  Mark Hamill and Carrie Fisher are def happy too, so that's something.  I guess.

OG

Trump At The NRA: God, Guns & Guts Keep Us Safe From The Hippies

If any gods decided to suddenly become real, a cleansing fire at this creepy NRA thing while the black cop in uniform is singing the national anthem would be a good fucking trick.  Otherwise, wait until Trump comes out and send something to kill everyone there in the most painful way possible.  If any of you fictional gods take care of this, I promise I will light a candle or something.

Matt Taibbi Gets Trump, Atmo

Trump's doin' the deed, and the GOP is toast.  The most fun will come during the late days of the campaign when we get to see how much the infection has spread into the down ballot races.  The chaos will be beauty, and we will all be blessed to witness it. 

Hillary's Choice: Not Elizabeth Warren Or Sherrod Brown

And not Bernie Sanders, though that would probably be the best choice of Senators, Vermont, Democratic governor, all that shit.  Not a Senator.  No, Clinton probably needs the normal white guy governor.  Gerry Brown's too old.  Cuomo's a fucking vile cocksucker.  Maybe the Connecticut governor, Malloy.  He's got a stupid name, Dannel, but he's the boring, rock-ribbed Demoratic white guy who was not a loser in the primary contest this time like Martin O'Malley.  Unless Malloy has a some sorta Hastert rule thing going on behind the scenes, he'd probably be a good choice, man, white, governor.  He fits the suit.

Attn. Scumbags: Don't Blow Shit Up During Our Political Campaigns, Even During The Boring Parts

Even better, don't blow shit up ever.  But especially during the campaign.  You won't get as much coverage as you would like for your insane blowing up of shit because of the campaign, and you might step on some psycho shit Trump does.  Not good.  So, to review, don't blow shit up.  Especially now.  Or ever.  Don't.

Liberal Media? Bwahahahahahaha, That's So Dumb!

Kevin Drum, Daily Kos, TPM are liberal?  Jesus, how stupid would you have to be say that without irony and/or snark?  The Hill, I guess.  Drum, Kos, TPM Josh are certainly Democratic Party media, with eyes on the lucrative sinecure deep in the bowels of the political and media establishment, so that meant that in the end, they would always be on their knees for Hillary Clinton or any other Democratic Party choice, but they are not at all liberal.  Only the village full of idiots in Washington, D.C. could be that inane.  Drum, Kos, and TPM fit right in.  Jesus.

Lite Bulb

Trump Meets Kissinger: More Proof There Are No Gods

If Trump meeting with Henry Kissinger didn't draw an apple-sized rock screaming from deep space right into the center of that room at a decent percentage of the speed of light, obliterating both of those vile motherfuckers, reducing them to unidentifiable sub-atomic particles, well, then there are absolutely no gods out there in any sense because certainly Trump and Kissinger both rate an almighty righteous smiting. 

All This New 'Ghostbusters' Stuff Looks Awful

Who will be shocked when this flick sucks bigtime?  Nobody.  But when the original movie was so, like, adequate and no better, why the fuck would you redo it unless you had a way to make it better than okay?  Money?  I guess, but this thing sure appears to have the potential to be anything other than a cash machine.

That Idiot Larry 'Whitey Tape' Johnson Is Still Around?

Jesus.  That fucking racist cocksucker Johnson has been as wrong as anyone can possibly be about every fucking thing on Earth, yet there he is.  What a fucking shit show.  Keep in mind that fatuous fuckbrain was purportedly an "intelligence expert" yet he got played like a chump on that dumb Whitey Tape thing.  Fucking brilliant!  Look for Johnson to be President-For-Life Trump's Secretary of State or National Security Advisor.  Johnson would fit right in with the Trump administration. 

Timely John Ralston Fisking

Ralston's been working overtime trying to break out of that Nevada shithole and into the big-ish time on the cable tee vee, so it is not surprising at all to hear that he is all-in against Sanders.  In May, all the proper establishment Dems and establishment media must now renounce Sanders as a bad man because very serious reasons, and I'm damn sure nobody had to spell it out for a striver like Ralston.  Now all Ralston can do is hope for the payday.

Back Heart

This Is The Dumbest Thing Ever On The Internet, Even For Obama Fluffers, Even For Trump

Did that fucking dipshit poster even read what Will Bunch actually wrote?  The fucking guy's been a registered Independent for most of his life, so registering as a Dem then unregistering as you had planned after the primary is really not the action of a histrionic special snowflake unicorn.  Complaining about what Will Bunch wrote does make you sound like a reading-comprehension-challenged fuckstain who should probably just fuck right off.  Or somethin'.  Hillary true-believers are more disgusting than the subhuman shitpiles getting boners over Donald Trump.

Except The Democratic Party Establishment Doesn't Want ANY Sort Of Universal Health Care Plan--And Never Has

The entry level pissboys and welfare academia fuckwads are either really fucking stupid or...

Anyway, what we do know is that if the Democratic Party had been serious about Single Payer or National Health or anything, said political party could have and would have spent at least the past two generations building up national support from voters though education and campaigning along with recruiting and electing candidates at every level from the local school board in some shitty little town in New Hampshire or Mississippi all the way up to House, Senate, and Presidency who 100% support the program.

This is exactly what the Republicans did with evil bullshit like anti-choice and anti-science and anti-worker insanity--they started small and local and modest and now we have screaming morons like Ted Cruz and Marco Rubio in the Senate and deranged, brain-dead monsters like John Kasich and Scott Walker and Sam Brownback destroying America one state at a time.

It can be done--and done on topics that are truly not popular with very many sane Americans, but tell the lies long enough and they become part of the discourse.  Health care is popular, and you wouldn't even have to lie about it, but when you let the evil conservatives tell lies for decades while you pretend not to hear, well, that says maybe your exceptional Democratic Party is a whole shitload closer to the Republican Party on these things than the fools would like you other fools to believe.

Imagine if the Dems had been serious in the 40's or 50's or 60's or 70's and started making national health care and universal coverage for all Americans a priority.  What would have happened with Tubby in 1992?  What would have happened with Obama in 2008?  Chances are not the shit shows and tragic failures we did get.

So, here we are again.  Universal health care is overwhelmingly popular, despite the decades of lies by the Republicans and the truly evil inattention by the Dems, and of course the Republicans will never allow it to happen, and of course the Dems won't do anything to change that today or tomorrow, guaranteeing that a status quo which benefits a very few and kills and impoverishes many will endure.  Some idiot on LG&M pretending he's made some sublimely cogent and wise pronouncement is either really offensive to anyone with even two functioning brain cells or really embarrassing for him.  Or both.

Going Out On Top With Johnny Marr

President For Life Trump Presents Ronald D. Moore's 'Manimal'

That's what Trump could do to make America great again: deliver the ultimate tee vee entertainment to a starving land, the Ronald D. Moore reboot of Manimal.  Since Simon MacCorkindale isn't available, Trump can decree that some fine Canadian leading man shall be called Simon MacCorkindale now and forever.

Deanna Holland, Exceptional American Religious Maniac Asshole Of The Day, Today

Dems should have destroyed the Republican Party long ago using this anti-abortion insanity as a club.  Notice this deranged loon Deanna Holland doesn't have any basis for making medical arguments, not an MD, not a PhD, nothin'.  Holland is one of the many demented Republican ass clowns destroying America only because the Dems have been feckless conservatives themselves for too fucking long.  Except real actual women and families suffer because these fools are allowed any influence at all.

Ronald D. Moore's 'Space Precinct'

Not really, but really.  Not RDM, he sucks, but a reboot of Space Precinct, played absolutely straight, would be a ton of fun, a bit of Babylon 5, a bit of Farscape, and yes a bit of the best of BG.  I'd rather have the reboot of the wondrous UFO any day, but why can't we have both?

Atrios Gets It, Atmo, Blasphemes

Slyly trenchant concise fisking of the Dem establishment by Atrios.  He gets it, atmo, but won't have any impact on either the true-believing fluffers or the rock-ribbed conservative establishment that is the Democratic Party.  The not-at-all-hidden truth of the Democratic Party is that the Dems in charge don't really--or at all--believe in (promoting) the ideas or policies anyone on The Left gives a shit about; only the most craven and addle-headed apparatchiks would claim the Democratic Party is left-wing, liberal, progressive.  At its core the Democratic Party is a solidly right-wing party in policy and in practice.  It's only when compared to the fucking insane reactionary fuckwads in the Republican Party, the religious maniacs, the deranged teabaggers, the nativist morons, the guntards, the imperial lunatics, that the Dems appear somewhat normal.  Hillary may be better than Trump--as many Dems were better than any Republicans many times in the recent and not-so-recent past--but that doesn't make her good, and it doesn't make her or her party connected at all to The Left.  Sr. Black understands that basic truth as well as anyone.

It's Gonna Be A Long Summer Listening To The Scum Who Love Hillary

The weak-minded establishment Dems, Obama-fluffer types, are nauseatingly stupid, and it's gonna be an awful summer.  Thank the gods for Donald Trump making damn sure that the GOP will be only a memory by the time the election rolls around. 

Sanders has exposed the true nature of the Democratic Party, again, and has run far stronger than he probably ever considered possible.  Meanwhile, Hillary has always been a lock, and the Hillary people have always been utterly tedious and rotten.  Hillary's no better than her supporters, but anyone who gave a fuck knew the truth about Hillary for 20 gods-damned years.

See Bad Oh Jr.

'Never Trump' Is Exceptionally American

And they know how to win!  Any day now they'll put an end to the Trump menace.  And then everything will be great for America when Mitt Romney runs for president and wins this time!  That will make America great again.

Every single human on Earth save the fatuous jerkoffs in the GOP can thank all the fucking gods that Trump is dismantling that loathsome political party piece by piece.  By the time Trump is done destroying the Republican Party, Hillary will be enjoying Obama's third term.  Heh, indeedy.

Rampant Idiot's Delight, Guntard Edition

Jesus fucking christ the human race is scum--but the upper-class twits are the worst.  Those fucking idiots are the only justification to ban all guns that any sane nation would ever need.  Let's hope those assholes somehow eventually all get exactly what they deserve.

Much To Young

That Idiot Neshek For The Astros Knows How To Pitch To Ortiz

It's pretty easy to make Ortiz look like a fool if you are a decent pitcher.  Always a good day when Ortiz is made to look like the loathsome asshole he is.

Where's The Absolute Last Place You'd Look For New Music Tips?

Trump campaign?  Good answer.  Trump himself works, too.  Okay, the second to absolute last place?  Upper-class twit central?  Winner winner chicken dinner.  Jesus.

And...X On American Bandstand

Rachel Maddow's Non Sequitur John Doe Fangirling

That was...unexpected.  Rachel Maddow had a nice little bit of sincere squee over John Doe and X during the last quarter of her show tonight complete with footage from American Bandstand--and tied it in to some Chris Christie bridgegate shenanigans.  Well, during this day chock full of Trump creepiness, a little detour for a minute to John Doe and X is not the worst idea ever.

Now Trump's Got Larry Craig On Board!

Landslide!  Trump's gonna win it all!  Especially the closet-case-elected-and-formerly-elected-Republican-officials constituency.  Wide stance is ready to make America great again!  Gods damn, Trump is unifying everyone in the fucking world.  Who's next as the yuge blockbuster Trump endorsement, Dennis Hastert?

Trump's Fake John Miller Persona Is Frakking Genius Too

Trump's doing his best to provide some solid entertainment during this awful part of the campaign season.  This John Miller thing, especially the recent denial, is bordering of nucking futz.  I hope to jesus fucking christ that somebody manages to find some documentation of more recent John Miller appearances.  Trump is already proving to be an even more exceptional American hero than anyone in history.  He's got the incoherent nativist rants, racist friends, and now multiple personalities.  This is wonderful.  Don't fuck it up, Hillary and Co.

Political Song for Dems to Sing

Trump's Racist Butler Is Fucking Comedy Gold

Come on, Dems, get on this shit.  This psycho asshole Anthony Senecal has been a Trump family insider for fucking decades, and as it turns out, he is a titanic racist shitstain.  Now would be a great time to smash Trump with this atrocity--set the foundation for a brutal and cruel yet completely accurate general election attack on Trump by fixing this butler insanity into the campaign narrative.  Clinton herself should not be the one doing it, but plenty of the surrogates should be out there pushing this shit into the gods-damned establishment media right fucking now.  Let's roll.  Trump should be given no quarter, and if, IF, the Dems are serious about having a shot at the House and serious about working to unglue the GOP's stranglehold on too many state governments, then a vicious and beautiful obliteration of Donald Trump and the rest of the Republican Party must start right fucking now. 

Political Song for Trump to Sing

Virag's Movie Reviews: Deadpool (2016)

Swearing!  Jokes.  Goofy self-referential chatter.  And dumb shit.  And swearing.  Not a great superhero flick--it was more obvious than Ant-Man--and not a groundbreaking comedy, Deadpool was a decent movie and went down really easy.  Ryan Reynolds wasn't terrible, so that's something, and the rest of the people in the movie showed up and did their thing, apparently.  The best bet here would be to team Reynolds' Deadpool with Brianna Hildebrand's Negasonic Teenage Warhead for the sequel and go with that shit cuz it worked and then let the rest of the next movie basically take care of itself.  As it was Deadpool was probably eight minutes too long and didn't do anything remarkable with its not-PG-13 status, but it was not nearly as awful as every other movie with X-Men in it, and everyone should count that as a some sorta victory.

Trump's Got John Boehner AND Dan Quayle?

Smells like victory!  What screams winner louder than Dan Quayle?  Nothing!  There are definitely not two bigger winners in the Republican Party than John Boehner and Dan Quayle.  Does Hillary Clinton have the support of John Boehner and Dan Quayle?  Fuck no!  Trump's a winner cuz the winners support him.  Fuck yeah!

Virag's Movie Reviews: Spotlight (2015)

Spotlight is absolutely an unabashed cartoony superhero flick for the over 17 cohort.  You had the selfless heroes, a team of avengers made up of Bruce Banner, Bruce Wayne, Howard Stark, and Victor Creed, fighting against the big bad monsters and winning.  The thing was a bit too humble-brag congratulatory and obviously award-baity at times and at others something most resembling a tee vee miniseries, but the movie was actually well-done for the most part and went by quickly.  (The director of this flick directed that train movie with Tyrion Lannister a while ago but also has unfortunate Paul Giamatti associations.)  If the good guys were a little flat, at least the bad guys were portrayed as true fucking slimeball assholes.  That's something considering the bad guys in the movie are real and really bad guys in real life. 

Trump + Giuliani, With Gingrich! Yes, Please Jesus

Good gods, this Trump shit show might just be way better than we could have ever imagined.  Trump on his own would be a wonderful spectacle, but if that asshole manages to add Rudy Giuliani AND Newt Gingrich to the mix, the Dems and their campaign against Trump might just create something possessed of astounding beauty.  In Gingrich and Giuliani, Trump would be managing to incorporate two of the very few Republicans even less appealing than Trump himself right into the middle of his campaign.  That's fantastic!

Finally Figuring Out Bernie

Bernie Sanders: Senator and career politician.  Yes.  But everyone should have known that.  Sanders ran in the Dem primary on purpose.  He didn't run on the Green Party or any other independent ticket.  Sanders understood was well as anyone that Clinton was the presumptive nominee the day Obama was reelected in 2012; none of the prime establishment Democrats challenged Clinton's nomination.  (Watching Sanders campaign against Hillary Clinton this year has probably taken 20 years of Joe Biden's life.)  Sanders knew what he was in for and is most likely quite surprised how well he's done, but that doesn't change what was decided on 6 Nov. 2012.

Virag's Movie Reviews: The Martian (2015)

Sure, it played out like some high school wannabe science dweeb's homemade stroke story, but The Martian was a solidly entertaining flick that damn near made you stop believing in your heart of hearts that Matt Damon should just be left on Mars to starve to death alone for fuck's sake.  The movie went down pretty easy, even if the change to a drama-free solo trek across the surface of Mars felt oddly off.  And for all their chatter about relative scientific accuracy, it would have been more realistically plausible to simply have the native Martians pop up with four minutes left in the movie, change their minds about leaving Matt Damon to die on the surface, and have them teleport him back to fake-NASA HQ or even better right onto the first tee with Ned Stark.

Exceptional American Screaming Lunatics Of The Day, Today

Are also deranged guntards because of course they are.  But not just guntard assholes, they're well-known geniuses and genuine rocket surgeons.  Here are your neighbors, your coworkers, fellow voters, all exceptional Americans.

Billmon Forever

Better than Batman Forever, even on Twitter.  Still killing it out there, even if his former buds in the wannabe Democratic establishment internets world never call him anymore.

Blind Image

Jeanine Pirro: Unhinged Or Pathetic?

Both?  Maybe you can have it all.  One thing's for sure, Hillary Clinton and Elizabeth Warren are each worth more than a billion Jeanine Pirros.  Warren is an actual U.S. Senator and was a professor at maybe the top law school in the nation, a school Pirro certainly didn't attend or teach at or anything.  Hillary Clinton went to Wellesley and Yale; Pirro couldn't do that.  And let's never forget that Pirro was such a loser that she couldn't even challenge Clinton in an actual election campaign.

Racist Micro-Brained Closet Case Of The Week: John Burk

Dumb as a post? Yep.  John Burk is a fucking idiot.  Racist cracker asswipe? Yep.  John Burk is a racist scumbag.  Way, way in the closet? Oh yeah.  That poor, self-hating little pecker is definitely trying way too hard to disguise his true nature.

Pinarello Tumblr

Why not?  Some cool steel there.  I had an SL/SP (or SLX/SPX) Pinarello, and it was a nice, straightforward racing bike.

Really Fun Nuclear Power Fisking

Linda Pentz Gunter.  Nice.  Nuclear power has the sad, silly dreams of the military-industrial-political complex propping it up around the world, but anyone who knows better--and isn't getting paid--understands that commercial nuclear power should be the absolute last on the list of energy ideas.  Nuclear power is the most polluting, most expensive, most pointlessly complex method of boiling water in human history.  All because some scientists and engineers felt bad about their fun fun nuclear bombs, flailed around in panic to find a civilian justification, and then the military and money boyz realized they had an easy chance to both justify their own atrocities and squeeze extra money out of the system.  Brilliant.

When He's Right, Even Erik Loomis Is Right About Andrew Sullivan

Sullivan is the worst.  In any year.  In any place.  Loomis is often a fatuous establishment wannabe, but he is right on about Andrew Sullivan.  A victory of our mostly befuddled welfare academia!  Huzzah.

Loretta Lynch Versus The Creepy Bigots In North Carolina

Excellent.  Moar, please: If some powerless minority does not have basic human rights, neither do you.  Repeat. 

Lynch was great; this is the sort of shit the Obama administration should be hammering on for the next six months to help the Dems up and down the ticket.  Fighting bigotry in general is a highly powerful weapon against the average Trump voter.  It's obvious.  Go kick those repressed idiots and jesus freak bigots hard. 

Jennifer Rubin's Reactionary Terror And Tearful Butthurt Is Glorious

Trump is obliterating the GOP.  There is Jennifer Rubin, risible right-wing tool, sweating through her pajamas as the Republican Party nightmare that is Donald Trump is made manifest.  Rubin has always been an utter moron, but she is the face of the political establishment in Washington--a face, anyway--and Trump is deboning that establishment one by one.  This is simply lovely to watch.  Trump: an exceptionally great American.

Recon Jr.

The Pink Baseball Crap Is The Fucking Worst

Awful.  Looks especially heinous with the Yankees pinstripes.  Just fuckin' quit that shit.

And the lame as fuck ESPN broadcasting crew with a knuckleballer is so gods-damned boring to endure.  Thank the gods in all the hells for the mute button.

Rude Jr.

Red With Blue Ron Cooper

Very cool.  Red with the blue and white is neat.

Hey! You Remember Seymour Hersh

Or maybe you don't.  But when the fluffiest of Obama fluffers get a yuge erection just thinking about sucking Obama's cock because he's not as flat-out fucking stupid as George W. "Retardboy" Bush or Ronny Raygun and not as ostentatiously evil as Dick "Dick" Cheney, let's not get any dumber and forget just what our exceptional President and our exceptional government has been up to for the last seven years.  Or the last 17 years.  Or the last 70 years.  Obama's been the man in charge of some real sick shit, and when you act like a fucking child fluffing him up, you're not doing yourself or anybody else any favors.

Seymour Hersh is the opposite of an Obama fluffer, and that's the reason he's doing his thing not-in-our-exceptional-America.  Certain voices and certain truths will simply not be tolerated.  Is that a good thing?  Is that what we are encouraging when we so tenderly suck Obama's balls?  Should we just turn off our brains and do our duty?  If you listen to the fluffy fluffers, it sure seems like it.

Getting The Old Stumpy Back In The Game

Now that's pretty cool.  The old Stumpy was probably never raced like that, but notice it is still rolling and the racing bike was trashed.  Heh, indeedy.

Who You Gonna Trust: Welfare Academia Or An Actual Successful Academic-Type Person?

Say what you want about Robert Reich, but that halfa bastard has been a pretty frakking top-shelf economist and shit if you measure by appointments and influence and all that garbage.  Reich's seen a thing or two in his time.  Then there's the welfare academia folks, boldly squawking from the hallowed halls of our non-competitive colleges and universities.  Those guys and gals know better than you or some dumb fucker like Robert Reich.  Like duh.

Fortunately for you and unfortunately for the welfare academia wannabe pissboys, the GOP is dead.  All the wounds Trump is inflicting right this fucking second are causing sepsis which is killing the Republican Party.  After Trump's final insult, the party will be split into probably three factions: the Trump people, racist assholes and the worst white people on Earth; the Teabaggers, deranged jesus freaks and the lowest of the guntard fucknuts who won't pledge fealty to Trump; and the rump of the establishment GOP which will slither right to their comfortable role in the Democratic Party.  Watch what happens to those local Republican majorities in the old Confederacy once the national party can no longer maintain the brand.  Pay exceptional attention.

David Price Fits Right In With The Red Sox

A whiny bitch and greasy fucknut.  It doesn't matter how shitty the Yanks are as long as they can fuck with the Red Sox occasionally.  It would be so much better for the species if Michael Kay was currently on assignment with the Trump campaign, tho...

Whether Under Ground

David Ortiz Is A Piece Of Shit, Now And Forever, Amen

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Burnin' 4 U

Joe Paterno Was Always A Gods-Damned Scumbag And The Pennsyltucky Vatican Was Hell On Earth

Of course Joe Paterno knew what the fuck Sandusky was doing--but he didn't fucking care about those fucking kids.  Paterno only gave a shit about Paterno.  The safety of vulnerable children did not matter to Paterno or anyone else at the Pennsyltucky Vatican.  Fuck all of them.  Someone should have burned that whole fucking place down.

The best thing you could ever say about Paterno and the Pennsyltucky Vatican is that they knew enough to follow the real Hastert Rule.

America Was Always Chock Full Of Vile Racist Assholes

Trump just made 'em scurry out into the light.  Trump didn't start this shitshow, though.  Disgusting bigots and loathsome racists and craven anti-Semites have been an exceptional part of America forever.  Now so many of these nasty fools will have their king fighting their battle for a while, making us all dumber in the process.

Ben Sasse Might Be The Only Motherfucker In America Dumber Than Bill Kristol

Kristol is another guy like Jared Kushner who'd be squatting naked in a ditch eating bugs if his father hadn't provided a livelihood for him.  Whenever Kristol opens his yap, you can count on it being utter and complete, and completely comical, bullshit, so if fatuous Nebraska dickbag Ben Sasse thinks it makes sense to follow Kristol's insane political leadership the way Sarah Palin did, well, that tells you that Sasse is even fucking stupider than he looks!

Jesus, Trump Picking Newt Gingrich For Veep Would Be A Mighty And Glorious Clusterfuck

Press hard, you're making four copies, motherfucker.  Jesus, Newt Gingrich, the bloated shitbag and serial adulterer, the failed teacher and failed politician, Newt Fucking Gingrich being tapped by Trump would be the most wondrous cosmic shit show in anyone's lifetime.  That ticket might not even get two--2!--votes nationally cuz I'm pretty sure at least Trump or Gingrich is dumb enough to forget to vote for himself on election day.

Pretty Sure President For Life Trump Will Take Care Of The Space Alien Problem, Too

Chill the fuck out, loons, Trump's got this shit.  He's gonna build the wall first, but those fucking space aliens are next.  Those greasy little bastards won't be probing anything when President-for-Life Trump solves our space alien problem--those assholes will be the ones gettin' probed!

Thank The Gods And The Guns For Our Exceptional American Freedumb In Maryland

It's a fuckin' twofer: this asshole was/is a scumbag murderer AND a cop.  America!  Freedumb!  We're the fucking bestest people ever cuz we got all the guns and all the violence and all the murder cuz we love freedumb almost as much as we like the gods.  Fuck Yeah!

Sonic Reduce

Not Hear

Political Song for Paul Ryan to Sing

True Gun Control Absolutely Starts With The Police

Armed police are a murderous, racist occupying army in much of America.  When we finally get serious about freedom, safety, the Constitution, law and order, and basic human decency and get rid of the guns, the police must be disarmed as the same time.  Police are paranoid and frightened because any asshole out there might be armed, and that's when innocent, unarmed, mostly minority Americans get exceptionally murdered.  Better police means better policing and better policing is done without guns for 99.9% of routine police work.  Make police work safer and make America safer; take the guns from the police, too, like every saner nation in the world.  It's long past time.

Making The Flat Earth Fools Look Sane

And like wonderful comic geniuses.  Otherwise, we had way too much exceptional sick-evil-crazy long before Trump got here.  Taste the freedumb.

Fisking Trump's Idiot Son In Law Should Be America's New Favorite Passtime

And why not?  That guy is a fucking complete zero who would surely be eating worms out of puddles on an unpaved driveway outside a shabby trailer on the outskirts of Scranton if not for his obscenely wealthy father.  The fact that Jared Kushner is a miserable, evil bastard and an exceptional American conservative shithead is just a huge fucking bonus.  As our republic crumbles, all us patriots should spend our last days brutally savaging this worthless asswipe before and after Trump makes him the Attorney General.

Dumber Than Trump: The Third Way

These fatuous shitbirds are the worst of American politics, making Trump look like a polymath statesman in comparison to their threadbare demented establishment conservatism.  Those reactionary Washington fools pretending to be centrist though their center is somewhere deep in the noxious hard-right wasteland are doing more damage to our society than all of Trump's supporters on their best days.

Hillary Supporters Suck So Fucking Hard

Suck AND blow.  Anyone who stridently supports Hillary Clinton is by definition a rancid piece of excrement, and the only things that stand in the way of an historic loss for Trump are the wretched establishment Dems who are currently Obama fluffers and Hillary lovers.  Just the fucking worst.

Poor Broken Megyn Kelly Looks Totally Strung Out Tonight

It's a bad day for Trump's enemies, and it is going to be an even tougher summer, something Megyn Kelly obviously understands.  She looks way worse than usual tonight, emptier, more confused.  Kelly is trusting Trump to be magnanimous in victory and forgiving of those who slighted him.  What are the chances of that?

Somewhere Ed Henry Wonders How The Fuck Bill O'Reilly Is Still On The Air

So, Henry had a side piece in Vegas, and he gets shitcanned by Fox "News" yet Bill O'Reilly, proven liar, world-renowned harasser, creepy sex pervert, shitty parent, risible, impotent cuckold, and violent spouse-abuser, is still free to wield the piss bucket on behalf of his Fox "News" overlords.  Ed Henry must be pretty fucking shocked that he doesn't rate.  Maybe next time Ed Henry will consider pushing his wife down the stairs instead of fucking someone else.  That's the Fox way.

And The Loser Kasich Is Out

Kasich's probably not gonna be able to suck Trump's dick well enough to get the VP nod at this point.  Being from Ohio and shit makes sense for Trump's campaign, but Kasich has been so weaselly and feckless that unless he has already made an agreement with Trump, the Trump people can and will probably do better than Kasich.  (Susana Martinez had better be getting her fill of the hooch right fucking now because if she joins the campaign, Corey Lewandowski's only job will be to knock the governor the fuck down every time she gets within 5 yards of the bar.)

Loser Cruzer!

Heh, indeedy.  After the most embarrassing campaign--and life--in recent American electoral history, exceptional loser Ted Cruz runs away after getting castrated by an addle-headed tee vee dipshit and political novice mostly known for a fatuous persona and failing to grow the sizable inheritance he got from his loathsome dad.  Now the Senate gets its worse member back, smaller, weaker, and even more of a target of relentless Senatorial opprobrium.  Frakking brilliant.

Nagasawa On Al Jazeera In 2014

Excellent Maddow With Bill Bogert

It looks like the vid starts automatically--at least it did for me.  But Rachel Maddow gets Bill Bogert from the 64 anti-Goldwater ad in the studio to trash Trump.  What's really great is that Bogert, who is 80 frakking years old, looks like he's going to wheeze and croak his way through the bit, but as soon as they get going he perks up like a fucking pro and nails the take.  Nice job, dude.  (John Lindsay was elected mayor of NY as a Republican in 1965, so that's apparently the last Republican Bogert voted for.  Nice job, too, dude.)

Cruz Is Being Gelded In Indiana By Trump

It's ugly for America's most exceptional loser Ted Cruz in Indiana.  Trump is absolutely stomping Cruz in a state where the GOP establishment should have had some stick.  While in reality it has been over since the night of the Iowa caucus, it is still a bit gratifying and entertaining to watch Ted Cruz be tortured and humiliated so thoroughly.  Donald Trump really is making America great again for everyone who is not Ted Cruz.

Charlie Black Is A Fucking Nimrod

Fucking genius, Charlie.  Jesus.  Trump deboned them on the first fucking day and hasn't stopped since.  Now all the fucking pissboys are lining to be Trump's favored bucket-holder.  Assholes.  All these fucking establishment media jerkoffs are as wrong as wrong can be about every fucking thing every fucking day.  Yet, they have the outlet and they have the influence.  Isn't that interesting?

Beck E

Too Bad Ryan Grim Was Not A Exceptional Freedom-Loving Second Amendment Patriot Who Stood His Ground

Ryan Grim must hate America and freedom because he didn't do his duty as an exceptional patriot and stand his ground when he was assaulted.  Are we sure Grim is not some sort of Canadian or homo or something?

But Not Here

No May Day for you, sucker.