Trump's Doing It, He's Destroying The Republican Party!

Watching Rubio and Cruz flail pathetically at the invader while Trump zips up his rubber Godzilla suit as he gets ready to stomp on the 1/100 scale Tokyo that is the Republican Party primary contest tomorrow, America finally sees the delicious reality of what Trump is doing.  Nothing is going to be left of the Republican Party or the Republican brand when Trump is finally done with them.  He's not merely killing the host, he's dismantling the nest and dissolving the individual pieces into a foul-smelling slime.  This is the ultimate devastation of a major political party in the modern era.  Why is Trump doing this?  For fun?  To help the nation and the society and the whole fucking world by destroying the rancid evil that is the Republican Party?  Because he's a deranged narcissist?  Because he's a shameless vulgarian?  Because Trump, Bill Clinton, and Hillary Clinton have been a once-or-twice-a-year polyamorous triad fuckfest since the 90s?  We may never know the answer to these questions, but we are gods-damned grateful for the beautiful outcome and will tune in next time for another exciting episode of Bullshit, or Not?

Dave Lindorff On Tulsi Gabbard

Not sure Lindorff gets it, atmo.  As much as I'd like to see Senator Sanders swing for the fences and blow Clinton out of the water once and for all by truthfully tarring her as a vile, neo-liberal, war-mongering piece of shit, I don't think such a plan exists anywhere but with Lindorff, who is not running the Sanders campaign as far as I know.  But changing the tenor of the Sanders campaign not what Gabbard's endorsement is about.  I haven't seen any reporting that Tulsi Gabbard was working with the Sanders campaign as part of a plan to attack Clinton over her disgusting foreign policy record.  Instead, I think Gabbard was looking to piss on Debbie Wasserman-Schultz, which is a worthwhile thing as DWS is a fucking trainwreck, but Gabbard is not looking to propel Bernie Sanders into another level of foreign policy campaigning. 

Never Forget That In A Failed Attempt To Stop Donald Trump In 2016, The Best The Republican Party Could Do Was A Greasy Twirp Like Marco Rubio

As Trump burned down the party after trapping every Republican inside the conflagration, the best and only answer the establishment had was Marco Rubio?  How the fuck does this happen to one of America's major conservative political parties?  Where's the strength?  Where are the Republican leaders?  Marco Rubio is yuge fucking loser, a walking flop-sweat joke, and easily the weakest, most pathetic presidential candidate in the last decade, worse than Huckabee or even the vile stain of Santorum.  So what the fuck is happening?  Who cares?  This is great stuff, gloriously entertaining funfetti, and we are all better for having such joy in our life.

Jeff Sessions: Exceptional American Racist And Trump Supporter

Fucking slimeball Alabama Man endorses Trump!  Even if not all people from Alabama are wife beaters, Jeff Sessions is a yuge piece of shit and racist cocksucker.  Go Trump!  FreeDUMB!  FREEDUMB!!

Fuck Yeah Bill O'Reilly's Custody Loss

Fuckin' awesome!  This is a great day for justice and for entertainment--but only if the other folks on Fox "News" and the other cable tee vee outlets decide to report on this shit with a smirk just as O'Reilly does all the time.  Only then will America get the joy it so richly deserves.

Local H With Peavey T-40 Content

Peavey T-40, the perfect bass for someone who needs the perfect sound forever and doesn't give a shit about anything else.

Eventually Their Band Will Be Your History

At the end, nothing will exist beyond hazy recollections and faded images that might me memories or dreams or fears or phantoms and Superchunk.  Superchunk will be the only thing real.  Superchunk will be the only thing  left.  They will be your life.  They will be the world.

Your Future President Hillary Clinton

She's a peach.  She's a star.  She's the most qualified candidate in American history.  She's a Clinton.  She'll be a shitty president.  She'll be just as bad as everyone thinks she will.  Every bit as bad.  Welcome to the future.

Better Call Saul Remains Way Better Than It Should Be

Season 2 started well, good, real good.  The show works so far, and that simple fact is pretty fucking stunning.  There's no good reason the show should have worked at all, but there you have it.  Better Call Saul is not merely exceeding very low expectations, it's turning into an excellent, highly-watchable and entertaining show regardless of its origin.

OK, Tulsi Gabbard Has Overperformed Expectations

Better than expected for any elected Dem is pretty fucking okay, considering the state of our political nation.  Gabbard is sure as shit not hopping on the Sanders train right as it crashes into the canyon because she's a bandwagon sort.  This smacks of political infighting and some kind of internecine DNC pissing contest, not that that is a bad thing at all.

When this political thing in Hawaii is finished for Gabbard, I would think President Trump should sign an executive order compelling Gabbard to move to Oklahoma so she can be Tulsi from Tulsa, and then she can be in Congress for life or something.  Just sayin'.  

Breaking: Hillary's GS Speech Uncovered!!

Heh.  Maybe a little to easy, but somebody's gotta do it.  Hillary's gonna be a disaster, just like her fat fucking shitbird husband.

South Carolina Is The Land Of Idiots

But it's time for Bernie Sanders to pack it in.  Winners win, and Sanders is not winning anything.  He needed to win in Iowa--maybe he did but ask Al Gore about fucking up an election so badly and making it close enough to be stolen from you--and he needed to win in Nevada and failed miserably.  Bernie Sanders is not going to win anything else in this primary season, and he won't win the nomination.  That sucks because Sanders is better in every single conceivable way than Hillary Clinton, and even if that difference is tiny in some things, it is real, and it is measurable.

Donald Trump is right about the black voters in South Carolina--they're fucking morons.  Of course, Trump is right about the white voters in South Carolina and everywhere else, too...

But the blacks in America are being fucked up the ass dry by their political leaders--as are the whites, of course.  To see the African American community in South Carolina go so absurdly for a vile conservative like Hillary Clinton is pretty much all the justification for any asshole who looks at the Black Lives Matter people and says "You deserve it" before dismissing them forever, much as the working-class white people have been deserving every fucking thing they get for fucking ever.  Sanders represented a small but significant upgrade from racist shitheads like the Clinton family, and the most victimized demographic in the United States continues for more abuse.  Also too, so does the AA community as seen tonight in SC, but fuck 'em all.

If You Have To Listen To The World's Smartest Republican

You're essentially screwed.  But, the Republicans in office now are fucking worthless and basically brainless, and there's no way in hell Obama is gonna cop to the screaming shit show that this economy in the USA.  There are real structural problems with the American economy, and the government doesn't have the ability to even acknowledge them.  Paul Craig Roberts may be the world's smartest Republican, but that's not saying much.

Jane Siberry's World Of Fun Stuff, 2016

Jane Siberry is out there, apparently not making albums any more, but still playing out and making music.  Canada up!

These Exceptional American Patriot Guntard NRA-Terrorist Cocksuckers Need To Hold Off On The Slaughter Until After Trump Buttons Up The Nomination

But for once it's a deranged not-white guy!!

Freedumb!

But these NRA motherfuckers really gotta wait on the murder until after Trump takes care of business.  Nobody's watching your exceptional American patriotism at work with all the funfetti the Republican primaries are bringing.  Wait.  Nurture your hatred.  Let future President Trump hog the spotlight with his hog sidekick Chris Christie.  Then when Trump is on vacation waiting on the convention, whip out your NRA card and kill some motherfuckers with your shiny shiny gun.  But if you do it right now, nobody's gonna care.  Wise up, exceptional American domestic terrorists!

Nobody's Gonna Miss Melissa Harris-Perry

She's a lightweight and a dope, but she's not exactly wrong about the walking fuckstain that is MSNBC.  Melissa Harris-Perry is probably one of the last people I'd put on MY news network, but MSNBC ain't a news network.  So, in exceptional America, we have exceptional Fox "News", exceptional CNN "News", and exceptional MSNBC "News" on our cable tee vee for our edification.  Loverly.

Eventually, Rubio Will Come Out The Closet

But the Rubio campaign won't last long enough this year for him to get outed, but one of these days, Marco Rubio will be free to live his life on his own turns. 

But not today.

Ladies And Gentlemen, In 2018, Your New Manager Of The Trump Resort And Casino Bali: Chris Christie

Chris Christie is amazingly good at being the second banana, the lunkheaded bully kicking the shit out of cripples and morons like Marco Rubio and Ted Cruz in order to curry favor with the star quarterback.  Trump has already really benefited from Christie's endorsement, and with the final insult coming on Tuesday, Christie will soon be sunning his bloated carcass in the sun in Bali, collecting that sweet Trump check and grossing out all the other sorry fuckers on the beach.

The reporting tonight is that Trump has had this endorsement for a few days but was waiting for the right moment.  Fucking brilliant.  Trump's a titanic douche, but he is either a political genius or a political idiot-savant.  Either way, Trump's fucking good at this shit.

Political Song for The Republican Party to Sing

The Republicans Are Timorous Losers, And Trump Is Their King

The tee vee asswhipes were desperately trying to fluff up Rubio after the pasting Trump gave him in the debate Thursday, but the more the establishment media clowns breathlessly mewled, the smaller they made Rubio look.  Trump's gonna win it all next Tuesday, and then the Trump/Kasich ticket can move out into the world bringing entertainment and bemusement and headaches to all the land.  It's gonna be ugly, but watching Rubio's and Cruz's entrails smeared all over the tarmac will be pretty fucking great. 

The Fucking Republican Party Has To Resort To Exceptional American Loser Mitt Romney

Yuge, yuge loser Mitt Romney can't stop Trump.  Mitt's a walking punchline, and the glorious fiasco surrounding his own taxes last time around was just another joke that made him such a yuge loser, so Donald Trump doesn't have much to worry about with Inspector Mittens on the case.

Plus, what's it gonna be like when Trump unloads on Cruz for his million-dollar Goldman Sachs boo-boo and Rubio for his tawdry fiscal failures?  And that's before Trump even gets to Cruz's or Rubio's taxes.  There's probably plenty of shit he could make fun of in those based just from what everyone knows already about their other fuckups.

Obama's Biggest Miscalculation Is A Yuge Understatement

But that miscalculation was not just Obama's.  A bunch of people didn't believe how insane the white racists in the Republican Party would go after Obama's election--or how the entire Republican Party would pander to that racist element.  Far too many decent Americans thought Obama's election represented a real step forward in ending racism in the country, and those people would take far too long to react to the explosion of racist activism inside and outside the government.  Obama didn't merely miscalculate, he doomed his legacy by failing to call out the villains from day one.  Now the Republicans are crazed enough to turn their backs on their beloved Constitution because the POTUS happens to be that black guy.  If Obama had faced the racist hatred early on, he might have been able to make a difference.

John Kasich Makes A Bold Play To Be Trump's Sidekick

Kasich wants to be Trump's Veep.  Ok, then.  Kasich does not believe he can beat Trump or even win in his own state, but he also knows neither Rubio nor Cruz would ever be Trump's VP, so Kasich sees the opportunity to do some heavy lifting for Trump against Rubio.  It's a ballsy, nakedly pandering move, but if it gets Kasich his wish to be the #1 Donald Trump pissboy, today will be the day he made that dream come true.

K Records Shit Show

Somebody in the comments had it right: do a big-ass Beat Happening tour to make some fucking money to pay the debts.  Make it an lo-fi festival that goes on and on.  Why the fuck not?

It Will Probably Take President Trump To Deliver Pacific Rim 2

I won't believe in this flick till I'm sitting in the theater on $5 Tuesday.  President Trump will fucking produce this movie himself AND get the Chinese to pay for it.

Sooner Rather Than Later, The Democratic Party Establishment, And The Rest Of America, Will Regret Denying Sanders

All the quacking little fuzzy ducklings in the Dem establishment should know better--but then you could have said that about a thousand things in just the last seven years.  The establishment is behind Hillary because the establishment is behind Clinton, in other words, reasons, Clinton reasons.  But as the Clinton Jr. Presidency unfolds, the establishment, professional Democrats will regret not backing Sanders while they watch the value of their brand and the value of their careers be debased a bit more every day. 

At Least Lee Papa Admits That We All Live In The Republican's Land Of The Nigger President

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.

Interesting Steve Potts Thing

As seen on the... Anyway, this Steve Potts interview is pretty decent both as a personal story and as a tale of someone who made it work in the bike industry.  Remember when WTB was going to be an OEM that rivaled, well, some of the rivals?  Grease Guard?  I loved that shit.  The tires too.  Then it all exploded and the shit became literal shit.  Potts was able to keep it going.  Steve Potts Bicycles sounds like it might be able to keep it up for a while.  That's cool.

Atrios Goes To Gawker

Seven?-ish years late, Hamilton Nolan channels Duncan Black--and a shitload of other folks, but this this Atrios' shtick for sure--and goes all sane about giving the people money to save the economy.  It's a yeah-duh-no-shit thing if you're going to spend the money anyway bailing out banks and wicked wealthy investors because that money would do so much more in the hands of the many and not the few.  Anyway, I guess it's a start.

Look for Hamilton Nolan to advocate increasing Social Security benefits and minting a coin to balance the budget sometime in the 2020s.

Ted Cruz Is What An Exceptional American Loser Looks Like

It's mourning in America tonight for Ted Cruz.  It's also mourning in America for the Republican Party.  Another big loss for Rafael Jr. in Nevada, third place behind a fucking greasy dipshit like Marco Rubio.  So why exactly is this idiot staying in the race?  Texas has to do the gods' work for once and give the primary victory to Trump next week.

Right now Trump is up by 24%, more than doubling the first loser Rubio.  Those sounds you hear are the fading death rattle of the Republican Party and the rising chorus of Democratic Party cheers at the Hillary Clinton inauguration.

Hey Susie

Yes, Yes They Do, Victor

Rock on, sister, but you don't need that shirt to do your talking for you.

Bernie Sanders Is Not That Bad, Shane Ryan!

Oh...I see what you did there, Shane Ryan.  You were making a funny.  It's really Hillary who is pretty nasty and bad.  Very good.  I get it.  Yah.  Funny.  Satire. Snark.  Yeah.

Chris Carter Is No Closer

X-Files was always kept small by Chris Carter's empty head.  Carter is another JJ Abrams, another Damon Lindelof, another Ronald D Moore, and never had any fucking idea what to do with his show.  I  can't believe people were surprised by last night's episode.

Another Way To Spell Incompetent: Rafael Edward "Ted" Cruz

Ted Cruz is a freedumb bomb!  He was always an unctuous little turd, but now he's shown once and for all that he couldn't manage a Miami Beach lemonade stand without fucking it up.  I'd imagine Cruz is going to get crushed tonight in Nevada, and if he even lasts long enough to lose to Trump in Texas, that would be some kind of exceptional American miracle.

So Far, As Usual, Obama And The Dems Are Losing On This Supreme Court Thing

The fluffers are not looking like winners today.  And the fact that there aren't a shitload of sitting Dems and candidates drowning out the Republican grandstanding on this thing is unsurprisingly typically disappointing.

Walking Head

Life Could Be Worse: You Could Have Bought A PureSalem Guitar

Jesus, what a fucking shit show.  This company is supposed to have a better quality control even though the instruments are made in Korea, but this guitar is a fucking piece of garbage.  And it costs a fucking grand!  Gigalbe right out of the box?  Not quite.  No amount of interwebs horseshit and ass-kissing can overcome this Canadian reality horror extravaganza.

Harry Reid Got What He Wanted In Nevada

Reid is a party guy, and the Democratic Party is ruled by the Clintons these days.  Reid won't be around long enough to enjoy the full fruits of his electoral talents, but some of us will probably be alive at the finish of Clinton Presidency II, and we will remember Harry Reid exactly as he deserves.

Canada And Hipster Do Not Compute

But they got 'em. Somehow.  Leslieville is the Brownsville of Toronto, I guess.  Jesus.

Alan Grayson Is An Awfully Unlikely Target

Wait...what? Grayson is an obvious target. Got it.  Grayson is hated by the entry-level, aspirant apparatchiks and other establishment pissboys, so even someone who would appear at Huffpost can see the logic behind the slime behind the attacks.  Perhaps Grayson is as corrupt as Hillary and Bill Clinton.  Perhaps Grayson is as corrupt as the Bush family.  Perhaps Grayson is as corrupt as the Cuomos or Rudy Giuliani or Dinesh D'Souza, but the entire Democratic Party establishment is not actively trying to destroy the Clintons or the Bushes or Cuomo or Giuliani or D'Souza.  The entire Democratic Party establishment is trying to destroy Alan Grayson.  What makes him so bad?

David Sirota And Billmon

Very entertaining Twitter feeds as the primaries have unfolded.  Let's all be sure we never forget why President Clinton II winds up being such an infuriating, disheartening failure.  We all should know it from the start and remember February 2016 when the time comes.  Sanders is not perfect but he would have been better--and even that tiny bit better would have been remarkable considering the state of America in the 21st century. 

Even Still Yet More Heartwarming Fukushima Stories

Fukushima, cuz jesus loves you enough to suck your dick on horseback.  Yes, Fukushima is a fucking atrocity and was of course an accident waiting to happen.  But what to learn?  Learn that the energy infrastructure of the entire planet is fucking shit show and that the governments in charge around the world are at best inept and at worst downright reactionary teabagging evil.  Have a nice day.

A Signal Boost Of Yo La Tengo Is Always Tip Top

Good job.

Sugarbaby

Jim Clyburn Is Stupid

And he, along with the rest of the Congressional Black Caucus, is making a yuge mistake.  I get that Clyburn and his brothers and sisters want to back the winner, but it is too bad that Clyburn is not smart enough to see that even if Clinton wins--even when Clinton wins--African Americans will lose big-time.  Hillary Clinton is as big a shithead as Bill Clinton is, and the AA community will suffer under another Clinton.  Sanders would be better for the black and brown people in America in every possible way, but it would have taken real political insight and real political courage, things lacking in American politics since before there was an America, to turn your back on the disgusting villain everyone assumed would win in order to support the actual not-racist-piece-of-shit candidate running against her.  But, Clyburn is an idiot and he likes to win. 

2 Es

Hillary Clinton Will Be An Awful President

She's a loathsome person, and her fat fucking sack of shit husband was an awful president as well.  The entire Clinton family is a reactionary cancer on America's bunghole, and nobody should pretend otherwise.  Sanders would have been better in every way, even if a little bit.  Settling for Hillary Clinton will mean the USA is just a little worse than it might have been.  I certainly won't be voting for Clinton, but that certainly won't stop Hillary from being elected in November.

Rebecca Gates Is Really Into Cycling

She's still out there making music, too.  The Spinanes were a fucking long time ago, but it's pretty cool that she's managed to make it work all these years.  Bicycling Magazine is still a thing, apparently, and Rebecca Gates was in it last year, as well.  Bikes and cycling are big parts of her life.  Gates is a legit indie Renaissance woman; she's engaged, thoughtful.  I always dug the Spinanes and her music and her voice and thought she was cute.  But I'm more than a bit of shallow bastard. 

Meanwhile, Exceptional American Gun Terrorism Continues Unabated

That guntard NRA cocksucker in Michigan must have forgotten about the primaries because he didn't get nearly the press coverage he could have generated on another weekend.  Even fucking NRA terrorists are fucking useless.  But the primaries didn't stop this piece of shit from expressing his exceptional American gun freedumb to kill six innocent Americans because America is the stupidest fucking place on Earth.

Donald Trump Is A Rampaging Kaiju

There's no Republican big enough to punch Trump in the face!  Trump spent the last decade standing outside the Republican establishment clubhouse, drunk, screaming at them that he was gonna march in there, drink all their booze, fuck their women, take his dick out and piss all over them before he burned the whole thing down with them trapped inside.  The idiot Republicans watched for years and did nothing, and then Trump did exactly what he said.  The Republican Party is on fire, burning to death, and none of those stupid fuckers can escape because Trump piled tons of garbage up in front of all the exits.  Thanks, Trump!

Welfare Academia V Obama Fluffers

Welfare academa sez Obama fails to get a justice confirmed, but the Obama fluffers are sure he gots this.  So what's it gonna be?  Which fucking idiot Democratic Party minor league pinheads are gonna win this midget fight?

Political Song for Donald Trump to Sing

The Republicans Were The Biggest Losers Last Night

Not Jeb!, not Cruz, not Rubio, not Bernie Sanders, no, the biggest fucking loser last night was the Republican Party.  The Republicans needed someone with unlimited money and wicked high name recognition to have any hope of derailing Trump, and last night they lost their sad last hope.  Jeb! was a fucking zero, but now the Republicans are drowned and dead.  Thanks, Trump.

Trump Fucking Did It! He Destroyed The Bush Family And The Republican Party!

That beautiful motherfucker Donald Trump really did it!  He fucking dismantled the Bush family, one of the worst families in America over the last 100 years, and their war crimes and their bullshit, and Trump has broken the Republican Party as a wonderful bonus!

The Republicans are dead tonight.  Trump cannot be stopped by Cruz or Rubio or Kasich, and without Bush in the race, the Republican nominee will be Donald Trump on his way to an historic 50-state loss to Hillary Fucking Clinton.  Amazing.  Wonderful.  Thank you so much jesus fucking christ for loving us so fucking much.

How Fucking Creepy Is It That One Of Scalia's Idiot Kids Is A Priest?

Wicked fucking creepy!  Nino Scalia was one of the nastiest creeps to ever soil the fabric of exceptional America, and obviously his family is just as bad.  When you hear priest these days, you immediately think self-hating homosexual and likely pedophile--and you're right!

Bernie Sanders Is Not Gonna Get It Done

America's stuck with Hillary Clinton.  No matter what happens going forward, it is clear he cannot get it done; after losing in Iowa and now losing in Nevada, Sanders is not going to win the nomination--or at least derail the Clinton nomination--regardless of the fact that Sanders is better than Clinton.  All the people who hoped against hope Sanders could somehow keep another Clinton out of the White House are defeated today in Nevada.  Sanders will turn out to be a political footnote, defeated by the usual villains of the American political establishment.  For a brief moment, it appeared possible that a moderate centrist like Sanders might upset the rock-ribbed conservative Democratic Party elite coronation of Hillary Clinton, delivering someone other than a vile reactionary stooge to the White House.  That chance has passed now, and the centrists and center-left Democrats now need to accept Clinton as their standard bearer, no matter how awful she truly is.

The only upside is that the Republicans and Fox "News" have to face their worst nightmare.  Clinton is unstoppable now, and in 2017 a woman and a Clinton will return to presidency in the United States, making a mockery of the the last generation of the Republican Party and the totality of Fox "News".  That's a good thing, but possibly the only good thing any of us will get out of 2016.

Hillary Clinton won the presidency today.

When The Truth About The Flat Earth Comes Out, Only Then Will America Be Free

The FLAT EARTH equals FREEDUMB!  Count on President Trump to finally free the truth about our world.  Then America will have FREEDUMB!

Democrats Are Fools For Not Running Hard And Winning On Abortion Rights

Anti-choice is a loser for Republicans IF the Dems would only fucking man up and tell the truth--because losers like this idiot Willis Krumholz and his fuckheaded buddies are as wrong as wrong can be about women, women's health, and abortion, but they get to lie and lie because not enough decent people are telling the truth.  If, IF, the Democratic Party stood up as the party of women's health and women's rights and the party of reproductive choice, stood up and countered the lies coming from mostly men and a few especially loathsome Republican women, the vast majority of America and exceptional American voters would support the Dems.

The answer to why the Democrats are not more strongly advocating for abortion rights as a political issue should be obvious to everyone.

It's Not A Surprise That Aspiring Water-Carriers In The Democratic Party Don't Love Alan Grayson

The pissboys of welfare academia are not Grayson's people.  I'm not exactly sure who Grayson's people are, but the establishment Democratic aspirants are not the ones to pick 'em.  Regardless, Alan Grayson would make a better Senator from Florida than anyone the Democratic Party would favor.

Search & Entry?

Hold It Down

Fisking That Asshole Bill Clinton Will Never Not Be Good Clean Fun

Tubby really was a loathsome piece of shit--only the Clinton's fatuous political opponents ever made him look like anything other a grubby little grifter.  Hillary Clinton rode that sack of lard to Washington, to the White House, to the Senate, and to Foggy Bottom.  She stayed married to that fucking miserable asshole; let's hope she doesn't make it back to the White House.

Sun Kil Moon Cannot Be Parodied

Mark Kozelek has spent his entire career parodying himself.  Red House Painters and Sun Kil Moon are both glorious and cringe-inducing, sometimes on the same album, sometimes in the same song.  Any parody is simply going to be a lesser work.

When Will Obama Pay For Scalia's Murder?

America's most exceptional are on the case!  Only the bravest will have the guts to speak out!  But Obama won't get away with murder!  The truth will come out!  The biggest teabaggers in America will deliver justice.  Thanks, Obama.

'The Preppie Connection' Is Your Boarding School Fantasy For 2016 Or 1984

Based on a true story, but apparently very loosely based.  The actual story is way more interesting, along with sad and stupid, than the flick is probably gonna be.  Plus the real story has disgusting Bill Clinton content.  I bet that shit won't be in the movie.  Regardless, the movie is the sort of thing that makes Andover and St. Paul's say thank the gods it wasn't us this time.

Political Song for John Kasich to Sing

Smorgasbored

Tee Vee Party Tonite

Jindaled To Death

Senor Lee Papa is a Louisiana guy iirc, so the Jindaling probably hurts him more than many folks fortunate enough to be not in Louisiana.  Louisiana and places like, shitty places, shitty places full of fucking morons, fall victim to Jindaling more easily because so many of those shitty people in that shitty place are also poor and ignorant and powerless people, people easily victimized by shitheads like Jindal.  And let's not forget that miserable stupid motherfucker Piyush was running for President there for a minute.

Fluffing Obama Is What Obama Fluffers Do

After seven years of witnessing the extent to which Obama has been stymied by Republicans and Democrats alike, stimulus, healthcare, sequester, it takes a great deal of fluffiness to be so moistly sanguine about Obama's excellent 2016 Supreme Court adventure.

I actually do have confidence Obama can turn this into a victory of sorts, as much as Kagan and Sotomayor were Supreme Court victories, mostly because the Republicans are fucking hilariously inept, and Obama does have some political and legal leverage, especially in the recess appointment department.  That said, there's no reason to fluff Obama up like some sort of superhero when the last seven years have shown he is anything but.

A New Hope For America: President Trump Versus The Morgellons

Morgellons are caused by the alien DNA in chemtrails. Duh. Everybody knows that.  (Note: This is the updated link.)  Even deranged shitheads like Harold Saive.  But we should all be talking about the hope.  The hope to stop chemtrails from poisoning us.  The hope to cure the Morgellons once and for all.  That hope is President Trump.  President Trump is not bought and paid-for by the chemtrails lobby.  President Trump does not have any alien money--or alien DNA!!--in his campaign; nope, nuthin' but exceptional American whiteness for Trump.  Trump is immune to Morgellons!  President Trump will tell you the truth.  President Trump will fight against the insidious plot to use chemtrails to seed alien DNA in white Americans.  President Trump will keep your vital fluids and your essence pure.  Vote Trump in 2016!  Because space aliens are not at all white!

If The Republicans In The Senate Were Smart...

McConnell and Grassley would have called Obama on Monday and agreed to confirm a candidate for the Supreme Court they believe is too liberal and one Obama would believe is too conservative.

But they are not.  Republicans are wicked fucking stupid.

Obama should announce publicly that he will definitely make a recess appointment if the Republicans reject his candidate, forcing the Republicans to be obstructionist again.  Almost everything in this situation favors Dems and has enormous downside potential for the GOP.

The best thing for the Republicans would be to take this thing off the table ASAPy-like and not risk giving the Dems and Dem candidates, especially Senate candidates, any leverage at all.  But luckily for all of us, Republicans are dipshits and will give all the power to the Democrats in this thing.  Will probably cost the Republicans the Senate, too.  Good stuff.

Donald Trump Is Flaying The Republican Party Alive

It turns out Donald Trump is really Roose Bolton, and the GOP is the flayed man.  Trump fucking savaged George W Bush and the entire last generation of the Republican Party bullshit mythology at the last debate, and the GOP has been unable to counter.  Of course, many, many Republican voters think that Bush and Cheney lied.  Even vast numbers of rank-and-file Republicans see that the war in Iraq was a disaster and an unnecessary tragedy.  Working-class Republicans, aka racist, guntard asswhipes, agree with Trump on this shit, and the Republican Party is so fucked.

Obama Killed Scalia! Excellent!

Thanks, Obama!  Barack Obama is a great American Patriot, killing Antonin Scalia in order to further the socialist mooslim United Nations caliphate communist takeover of Texas!  Can't wait!

Scalia's Death Is Great For Fisking Funfetti, Too!

Antonin Scalia dead is the gift that keeps on giving!  Fisking Scalia is not hard, but Dave Lindorff has a go and has some fun.  Scalia was a vile shitbird of titanic proportions, but that should not stop all good people from loving and laughing and reveling in his ignominious death on a trip to shoot pet birds in a Texas shithole.

Lolita Ya Ya Kubrick

Missing The Point About Kubrick And Lolita

Ryan Vlastelica. Oops.  I guess Lolita is easily seen as a less than a full-on stunner from Stanley Kubrick considering what Kubrick did after, but when you say that Peter Sellers ruined the film--and mean that as a bad thing--then you are shouting to the world that you have absolutely no business discussing Lolita, Kubrick, or films in general.  Sellers did "ruin" the film with his performance in exactly the same way Quilty ruined Humbert's, and Lolita's, life.  That's like symbolism and film criticism 101, dude.  What Kubrick retained most from the book was the absolute disgust for every character.  Kubrick could not--and probably did not want to--show Humbert as an evil, sweating, leering child rapist, but Sellers' Clare Quilty was one method Kubrick could use to show how disgusting Humbert truly was.

And not for nothing, but Peter Sellers also ruined the film for James Mason.  Mason was led to believe he was the star of the movie, but Kubrick underlined the nastiness of repulsive introvert Humbert Humbert by having Sellers create a raving, evil Clare Quilty to steal the film from a brooding James Mason.  Pretty fucking funny.  And if you think that "ruins" the film, you're a fucking dope who should just sit there quietly picking his nose and/or ass while the rest of us enjoy the flick.

Holy Shit, George W Bush Is Even More Retarded Today Than He Was In 2008

Fuck, that guy is one dumb motherfucker.  Imagine being so fucking desperate that you have to rely on a demented shitstain like George W Bush to bolster you campaign.  Imagine being as big a loser as Jeb! Bush.

Day Short

Timely Reminder Peyton Manning Is A Huge Asshole

That goofy pizza rat motherfucker Peyton Manning is a fucking bully and all-around asshole.  With so many dipshits out there sucking up to him after beating Carolina, this is good shit to remember.

It Cannot Be Overstated How Great Yesterday Was

Scalia.  Dead.  Excellent.  A great day.  Maybe the greatest in your lifetime.

Scalia was one of the baddest bad guys, an ignorant, nasty bully who did everything he could to make life more difficult for poor people and minorities and everyone else in the reality-based community.  Now that he's dead, we can all smile a little brighter.

Scalia Dead! A Great Fucking Day For America And The World!!

Fucking awsome! Many decades too late, but still wonderful!!  With that hateful, evil, stupid motherfucker now a rancid, puss-bloated corpse and off the Supreme Court, the country suddenly becomes measurably a better place to live.  I personally want to thank jesus fucking christ, whom I love so much, for this wonderful Valentine's Day present.  I only wish hell was a real place, full of boiling acid and everlasting fire and hyperactive sodomizing spiky-cocked demons so that Antonin Scalia could endure an eternity of the excruciating torture he so richly deserved.

Jim Gilmore: Fucking Loser

Kbye.  Gilmore is a legit piece of reactionary human garbage, but jesus fucking christ, he is fucking worthless.  Even with his snout deep in the wingnut shit trough, Gilmore could not get any of the exceptional rock-ribbed assholes to give a fuck about his campaign.  Weird.  Trump's some sorta political genius, yet the supposed pro Gilmore is back to collecting a check for lovingly sucking on the futile bones of Paul Weyrich.

School Shooting And Only Two Dead - What The Actual Fuck

Two.  Only two?  Only two dead schoolkids?  Gods Fucking Dammit, America, you can do better!  Two dead kids is pretty fucking pathetic considering we have more guns than school kids in exceptional America.  When America kills its children with our exceptionally insane firearm perversion, America demands more than two fucking dead kids at a time!  Two!  Two fucking dead children.  Two is for when you use a rock to kill.  Or a stick.  Two is for pussies.  The minimum dead kids in exceptional American exceptional school shooting should be 10.  Maybe 20!  Fucking stupid kids can't even use a gun correctly.  Guns are for killing.  We need to teach our kids how to kill better!  More guns!  More dead kids!  Make America Great Again!

I am the Republican Man of the Year.

Summer In The City

Complete & Green From Santa Cruz

I like this thing a bunch.  Fork, stem, color is all really working with a welded steel frame.  Very cool.

At Long Last, Cliven "Al" Bundy Gets Popped

About fucking time.  The Feds shoulda dragged that freeloading, chickenshit asshole away a long time ago and dropped him in a CIA blacksite hole somewhere.  It's also too bad those guntard dickbags in Oregon didn't get treated as roughly by the FBI as your average harmless, non-violent Occupy Wall Street kids.  Funny how that works.

We Need President Trump Because The Earth Is Flat

Only Donald Trump is man enough to get to the truth.  Trump's no pussy who is afraid of the hard, flat truth.  President Trump will make sure America's greater--and quite probably flatter--than anyplace on Earth.  Who else is going to stand up for exceptional American and make America great again? Hillary?  No fuckin' way!

More Bad Ideas, Department Of: Battlestar Galactica Movie

Let it go, assholes.  The reboot show was good for 15 episodes, maybe.  And they couldn't keep it going; even if Blood and Chrome had an okay premise, it looked cheap and small.  Nope, give us Pacific Rim 2.  Give us the Farscape movie.  Battlestar Galactica is over.  Move on. 

Chris Christie: The Biggest Loser

Moby Dickless Christie is one of the biggest assholes in exceptional America, yuge, yuge asshole, and now all of America can see Chris Christie is also a yuge loser. 

Get Out, iCarly Fiorina

You suck, and you were a terrible candidate and an even worse person. 

There Are So Many Losers In The Republican Party Tonight

And that is a beautiful fucking thing.  Kasich, loser.  Cruz, loser.  Bush, loser.  Rubio, loser.  Christie, loser.  Trump demolished them, and he's not even a fucking Republican.  He's a vulgar narcissist who does not give a fuck about the Republican Party or Republican priorities.  The Republican Party is dead.  Trump can't, and won't, be stopped by that handful of losers.  The nomination is Trump's, and the national party is gloriously, majestically fucked.

Ted Rall Solves Bernie Sanders

Yep.  That would work.  Teh peace dividend.  Or at least, a sane defence policy with sane defence spending and not the orgy of militaristic profiteering we've been enjoying for a fucking century could go along way to realigning the priorities in our exceptional America. 

Donald Trump's Victory Speech

Maybe Stan Ridgway will be Trump's Secretary of State.

It's Not Misogyny To Say Hillary Sucks At This Game

Bernie Sanders, on the other hand, is fucking good at it.  He's taking his coverage tonight and running his entire stump speech for anyone who might not have heard it before--even Fox "News" is showing it, but not Fox "Business" of course as they're waiting for their idiot god Donald Trump.  Bernie is a serious politician, and he understands the game.  Hillary Clinton is not a serious politician.  She lacks electoral experience.  She has no charisma.  Sanders just beat her in New Hampshire and then rubbed her nose in it with the victory rally.  Clinton will probably get the nomination and will win the general, but not because she's even 1/10th the politician Bernie Sanders is.

The Dumbest Thing On The Internets Today

Huffington Post, of course.  I have no idea who Lance Simmens is, but he has shown exactly the sort of soft-headed fucktardery perfect for Talking Points Memo, MSNBC, or the Washington Post.  Bugfuck insane, addle-headed assholes are what both the Huffington Post and exceptional America are all about.

The Media Assholes Are Really Trying To Make Kasich A Thing

If Kasich is the first loser, second-place finisher in New Hampshire, the Republican Party is in deep Sununu; Kasich is going exactly nowhere in this primary season, no discernible personality, no money, no hope.  Kasich coming in second is the best thing for Trump, the best thing for America, the best thing for the world, and the worst possible thing for those running the Republican Party.  None of that will stop the idiots in the rock-ribbed conservative establishment media from fluffing Kasich tonight because Kasich is one of their kind of people, a nasty-minded simpleton, a sniveling tee vee careerist, and an ignorant, smarmy asshole--the media love Kasich because he is them.  The Republicans have very few good options tonight.  Kasich is an albatross for the Republican elites, as is Christie, Rubio, and the rest of the sick, sad fools they have running.  Trump's gonna gut the party and strangle it with its own rancid viscera.   

Sadly Enough, Trump Talks Like A Human

Calling someone a pussy, especially if that person is in fact a pussy, is a pretty normal thing in exceptional America.  Not nice, but not beyond the scope of human decency.  Trump said he would bomb the shit out of some brown people and said that people should tell corporations that left for China or Mexico to go fuck themselves.  That second thing sounds pretty reasonable, actually.  Vulgar compared to the sort of language heard on the tee vee and shit, but normal talk for normal people.  Trump is fucking clown, but he knows how to talk to his peeps.  Too bad a few of the Dems out there trying to grow their party don't have a better sense about how to talk to people.

Dept. Of Bad Ideas: New Star Trek On TV

I think the time of Star Trek is passed.  After J.J. Abrams murdered the last hope of any decent fan, any idea about creating a new show for the tee vee is pretty fucking stupid.  Hey, maybe it will be frakkin' brilliant, but probably not.

Not Was

Freedumb's Greatest Assholes

The Free State Project, an especially sad little club full of Randian pipsqueaks who are apparently insane enough to believe they're gonna take over New Hampshire and institute some sort of risible libertarian utopia instead of being tarred and feathered and run out of town on a rail.  I almost wish they stood more of a chance, cuz watching these buffoons getting abused by the legitimate residents of New Hampshire would be way more entertaining than wrestling.

Every Day Trump Drags The Biggest Idiots In America Into The Light

Mainstreaming risible yet toxic lunacy is what Donald Trump's all about.  This is America, exceptional America, ignorant America, ugly American America, and Trump is their god.  If Trump is able to destroy the Republican Party, it would be great if Trump could poison the well for these fucking asswhipes as well. 

Let's Not Forget That Scott Lemieux Is Not That Bright

And he's an establishment Democratic Party guy, wannabe, sure, but he's a company boy.  It's not like Lemieux is some sort of sparkling intellect, barely holding on to a post at a school nobody goes to if they have a better choice.  Anywho, Lemieux, and the fellers like him, is always so dismissively sure that anything which is not a favorite of the rock-ribbed, establishment corporate Democrats is Never. Gonna. Happen. Ever.  Well...Scott Lemieux is not a disinterested party.  He's pushing an agenda first and an analysis second, just like so many others.  Agreed.  Stipulated.  That doesn't change anything.  When Lemieux dismisses the possibility of change--works for it, works against change--he does it because he desperately believes that position will benefit him.  Which, actually, is fine.  As long as everyone involved on all sides understands that shit, it's fine.  Or at least, it's not gonna change.

The changes in health care and everything else require work and attention and plenty of hard stuff.  Legit change will also depend on political engagement by way more Americans than participate now.  If progress is Never. Gonna. Happen. Here. Ever. it's mostly because the Democrats fight against that change at every step.  And the pissboys do everything they can to prevent that change on behalf of their masters. 

Slagging Hillary Will Be An Endless Source Of Amusement For America For Years And Years

Liberals will slag her, conservatives will slag her, nobody's gonna like her much, but at least the Republicans will be shitting acid bile into their diapers till 2025.  Not that it will be all that great for America, outside the entertainment factor, but we're essentially beggars eating dead worms out of puddles of leaden sewer water in Flint, so, enjoy!

In The End, The Panthers Can Never Be Forgiven

For allowing that slimy shitstain Peyton Manning another chance to hustle for pizza and beer money.  Carolina was the better team going in, and somehow they should have been prepared for that defense.  America has withstood many indignities, including the game last year where the Seahawks gave the win to NE and the Reagan administration, but America should never have had to watch the fucking Panthers shit the bed and send off that scumbag friend of Ari Fleischer as a gods-damned Superbowl winner.

Fuckin' Panthers

Denver is playing like shit, and Manning is a fucking mess, but the Panthers are making it way too hard on themselves.  Fuckers.

Brutally Effective Fisking Of Matt Yglesias

Seth Ackerman.  Who got a little pissy and decided to let loose on Matt Yglesias for being a soft-headed douche.  Nice.  Is Yglesias a transparent hypocrite?  Sure.  Is this shit a bit of inside baseball bitchiness because Yglesias, like Ezra Klein, has ascended to the height of establishment media wealth and inanity far ahead of their classmates?  Absolutely.  But that doesn't change the fact that Matt Yglesias has about as much credibility and brains as the average fucker punching a clock anonymously in any grimy backwater in exceptional America, yet Yglesias has the privilege, and that is making all of us just a bit dumber every day.

Dispatches From The Police State

Sure, the presidential funfetti is getting all the press these days, but where are all those assholes who purportedly give a fuck about liberty out there?  Or where are all the commentators and writers who can get the message out?  Not too many people seem to care.  Not enough.  Not enough coverage.  Not enough outrage.  This bullshit is the real threat to liberty.  This is the police state at work in exceptional America.  And hardly anybody fucking cares.  The NYPD is as bad as the LAPD or any police force in the South.

And That's All She Wrote For Rubio

Donald Trump is one lucky motherfucker.  First, Carson finishes off Cruz, and now Christie has gutted Rubio on the live ABC tee vee without getting even a lone fleck of Rubio's pale, watery blood on Trump's jacket.  Christie is another piece of shit on Trump's christmas card list, I guess.  Tuesday will be the last we hear of Cruz, Rubio, Carson, Fiorina, Christie, and Kasich.  Bush has the money, but I don't think his nasty mother is man enough to beat Trump.  That doesn't mean the Republicans in Washington aren't lighting a fucking candle and praying for a miracle.

Know-In

Julian Assange And CounterPunch This Weekend

John Pilger and Jonathan Cook.  Kudos for the CP folks for staying on this for our exceptional American edification.  The Assange case is a tremendous shit show, and the historical reckoning is going to be fucking ugly as hell.  Except for Ecuador.  Ecuador is going to look brilliant in all this.  I can't help but believe a bigger, higher-profile nation would have been in deep shit after the courage Ecuador has shown, but Ecuador is just too small and nimble to be easily fucked with by clumsy brutes like the exceptional U.S.A.

Keen Rock-Ribbed Village Idiot Wannabe Analysis

Duh.  Fucking genius.  Both Marshall and I want Trump to win because entertainment and Republican destruction reasons, but the difference is that Josh Marshall is eager to hold that piss bucket, and I can haz no buckit.

Jesus, NH's Bob Smith Looks Awful

Fuck.  Somethin's up with his head--without the rug he used to wear or the Trumpian comb-over, Smith looks like a fucking cheap Star Trek alien.

WTF, It Was Ben Carson Who Put The Stake Into Cruz

Ben Carson's only use to America, but that's fine, just fine.  It wasn't Trump who finally eliminated Cruz, so Trump should remember to put Carson on the christmas card list for fucking ever.  Ted Cruz was too big of a shitbag for even the Republican voters of New Hampshire, and Ben Carson made sure they knew it.  Unexpected, unlikely, but nice job, Carson. 

Political Song for Donald Trump's Hair to Sing

How Fucked Is The Republican Party Going Into New Hampshire? Fucked.

Hella fucked.  The Republican Party would have been less fucked if Trump had taken out Cruz in Iowa.  That would have cleared the path for Trump and would have given everyone a chance to figure out what the fuck Republican Inc. was gonna do to mitigate the damage for the general election.  But now the GOP has to find a way to deal with all the coverage Trump is going to generate rampaging his way to the nomination, crushing Cruz, dismembering Rubio just for fun, and managing to insult and alienate as many exceptional Americans as exceptional America has exceptional Americans.  Trump the inevitable nominee would have done far less damage than Trump the triumphant primary election victor.  Oops.

Trump winning the nomination the old fashioned way is now the Republican Party dilemma.  In order to save the party, the masters of the GOP need to maneuver another candidate into the nomination, an establishment candidate they can control, an establishment candidate who will be savvy enough to not slaughter the Republican brand even though said candidate will suffer an historic loss in the general election.  But who should that be?  Kasich?  Christie?  Or Bush?  Christie is not winning nothin' ever again.  He also won't win enough against Trump because Trump will beat Christie into a blubbering bloody pulp.  Christie is a yuge pussy and as soon as Trump started in with the fat jokes, Christie would bawl his way back to his mommy--hello nominee Trump and goodbye Republican Party.  John Kasich is as nasty a piece of work as the Republicans have puked up in decades, and if you scratch him you find the real John Kasich is a smarmy and priggish repellent little man, a vile Wall Street pissboy and a sniveling failed Fox "News" careerist.  Trump would smush him like a bug.  That leaves "Please Clap" Jeb!.  Trump's already gelded him, but who do the Republican insiders have left?  It's too late to bring in another candidate, and when Trump becomes the nominee, the first thing he's gonna do is eat the entire Republican Party for breakfast, and the second thing he's gonna do is shit them out and flush them into the cesspool of history.  The Washington-elite Republicans need Jeb!, even Jeb! minus his balls, to save them from Trump.

Cruz cannot win the nomination and will not win a single primary after Iowa, and the Republicans know that.  Rubio is a fucking sweaty loser, and the voters can see that as easily as the Republican establishment; Rubio won't win anywhere.  Cruz and Rubio mean Trump wins, and Trump winning means the Republican Party is doomed.

What's the choice for the Republicans?  It has to be Jeb!.  And Jeb! cannot and will not win the general election.  Neither will Trump, but at least the Republican Party is extant after a Jeb! campaign.  Every decent American desperately wants Trump to win the nomination and obliterate the Republican Party itself along with the very idea of the Republican Party for all time.  The only ones who are scared shitless of that wonderful outcome are the loathsome Republican elites.  Their only hope is Jeb!.  Imagine that shit.  How the fuck are they gonna pull that one off?  First they have to get Kasich, Christie, Carson, and Fiorina out of the race as quickly as possible.  Trump--and the voters--will eliminate Cruz and Rubio in short order, getting the best of the worst and utterly vital, for the Republican Party, match-up of Trump and Jeb!.  Then the hard part comes when the Republicans have to figure out how a fucking simp like Jeb! can be made to get rid of their Trump problem.  Good luck, motherfuckers.

This was the worst line-up of Republican presidential candidates in American history; Trump understood this and knew he could get the better of them.  Where were the strong Republicans, the men and women who could have had a realistic chance of beating Hillary Clinton?  Where were the Republicans who could have had made a reasonable appeal to general election voters in the event the inevitable Hillary was somehow not the nominee?  I guess they don't exist, so the GOP coughed up this panoply of fatuous morons and risible buffoons to be delightfully gutted by Donald Trump and quite probably destroy the Republican Party as a bonus.  Exceptional.  America.  Fuck.  Yeah.

Meanwhile, Hillary Sucks At The Game

Hillary Clinton is a terrible politician.  This debate tonight, any debate on any night, is a disaster for her.  Simply dreadful.  She could not be less appealing if she tried.  Unlike Bernie, who is a natural, Hillary is an utter failure at charm.  If Clinton gets the nomination, she wins.  But if Sanders get the nomination, he wins bigger.

Zika Virus Now Making Republicans In The USA

And conservatives around the world!  Small heads, undeveloped brains, and you have the Republican party voter in a nutshell.  At least now we know where Trey Gowdy came from.

Bernie Sanders Is Good At This Game

Real good.  Sanders has the stick to make this a contest, way more than most people thought--he's shown it already.  Fucking with Trump is brilliant, and Hillary could never pull this off.  The Republicans don't want to run against Sanders; they would lose big and know it.  50-state landslide big with any of the losers they have in their primary.  Unfortunately for the world, the Republicans are not gonna have to run against Sanders. 

No Saabs, No Shit

It's been five fucking years--the Chinese electric thing was never going to work, and if there aren't cars made in that Swedish factory, there is no Saab.  That sucks.  Saabs were the best cars for the money ever, but they stopped making them a long time ago.

Bob Mould's Stratocaster Cuz Why Not

I guess he liked it.  Years ago, it was a new era, new guitar.  And now he has five or whatever.  Cool.

Sad Day When The Gossip Kids Make More Sense Than Welfare Academia

Or maybe not so sad, really.  At least the gossip folks have a chance for a sane perspective due to the fact that their collective head or heads are not quite so far up their ass or asses.  Plus the gossip people probably actually like their lives and are not embittered demi-failures desperately squealing and slobbering for their dream of that most desirable sinecure as tenured pissboy for the non-selective and non-selected cohort of the political establishment.

Digby Signal-Boosts A Fitting Tribute To Santorum Today

A gentle, good-natured parody of those two rancid fucking morons Camille and Haley and their demented Santorum song.

"Go Home."  Heh, indeedy.

Go Fuck Yourself Rick Santorum, You Are A Stain On America

Santorum, nobody likes you.  NOBODY likes Santorum.  All the bleach in the universe will not wash the Santorum stain out of America.

Fuck Off And Die Rand Paul, You Suck Major Moose Cock

Rand Paul is an asshole of titanic proportions, so we should all laugh and point at what a fucking loser his is. 

Brooke Goldstein, What A Cunt

And that racist bitch is on with fetid racist harpy Megyn Kelly.  What a pair!

COCKS

Will Trump Start Spending Money On His Campaign Now?

So far, Donald Trump's been holding his cash, but if he starts to spend now, will he change the scope of the race?  I'd imagine Trump wants to sink Marco Rubio once and for all ASAPy-like.  Mistress rumors, anyone?  Whether or not Trump over-performed or embarrassed himself in Iowa, he's either all-in or he won't last through February.  But what does an all-in Trump look like to the rest of the candidates and the Republican establishment?  Nothing good.  While Trump unbound looks like pure, unadulterated, high-calorie funfetti to the like of us, to the Koch Brothers and their ilk, that is one scary fucking monster.  Let's pray to jesus and all the gods that we get to see that shit.

Snojob

Hillary Will Never Be Beloved

That's for sure.

Even if she wins the nomination relatively easily, Hillary Clinton will never engender the sort of enthusiasm and support her husband and Barack Obama enjoyed.  And she'll never be Bernie Sanders, even after Bernie has to concede the race to her.  Plenty of Democrats will vote for Hillary because she is the frontrunner, because she is a woman, because she is the nominee, but after Bill Clinton and Barack Obama, Hillary will always be distrusted and disliked.  And for good reason.  Hillary is at least as big a piece of shit as Bill.  She is a tactless political panderer without the charm of a Bill Clinton or Barack Obama.  Or Bernie Sanders or Elizabeth Warren.  But Hillary Clinton is the Democratic Party establishment in 2016 and is ruthless in exploiting the totality of that privilege.  Hillary Clinton desperately wants to be the President--and so should be automatically disqualified, but won't be--and she is going to do everything she can to get there.  She's probably going to be quite successful at becoming President.  But chances are she won't be much of a President once in office though, and Donald Trump will drive himself batty wondering how he lost the election to Hillary Fucking Clinton.  President Hillary Fucking Clinton.  The only really good part of a Hillary Clinton presidency will be watching the teabaggers and bigots and misogynists and all the other assholes who hated Obama so much lose their shit once again over President Clinton 2, Lady President.

Coming in 2017.

Virag's Movie Reviews: Tomorrowland (2015)

This thing was exactly the shallow, simple-minded mess you would expect from the likes of Brad Bird and Damon Lindelof, but at times, bits of the flick worked okay.  Clooney should have been the focus, as he seemed to understand more about the film at times than the director did.  Some of the visuals worked well, and parts of the movie almost looked like an instruction of merging interesting CGI with some of your physical sets, and I mean that in the best way.  But Tomorrowland was continually undone by the nonsensical script and unfocused direction and a majority of the cast who either didn't get it or didn't care.

Time For A National Primary

The USA has so many undemocratic, non-democratic, and anti-democratic institutions and traditions in our society--electoral college, Senate, caucus primaries--including the current presidential primary system.  Iowa and New Hampshire and South Carolina don't represent the majority of the American people, but giving those states an enormous influence does a great job of disenfranchising vast numbers of Americans, including those in most big cities and other less-conservative areas.  That's not an oversight.  Iowa and New Hampshire are two of the whitest and boringest awful places in America, and South Carolina is...

It's way past time to institute a national primary day weekend, probably two weekends before July 4th, where every state votes at the same time, sunup Saturday to sundown Sunday, with all results reported at the same time.  That way the primary campaign is a national priority and every Republican and Democratic voter's vote counts.  The national conventions can be scheduled for the third and fourth full weeks in July with the election on the first full weekend in November, maintaining the November election and January inauguration schedule but exploding the amount of democracy in our presidential selection process. 

John B. Judis, Exceptional American Moron

This is such incisive conservative inanity it could have been written by Josh Marshall himself.  But it wasn't.  No matter.  "Marco Rubio, would be difficult for the Democrats to defeat in November" according to Judis.  That would be fucking brilliant, rock-ribbed reactionary political analysis if you had never seen Marco Rubio on the tee vee or listened to Marco Rubio give a speech or read anything written about Marco Rubio.  However, had you any first-hand, eye-witness type experience with Marco Rubio and managed to actually write that, you would be a fucking titanic dipshit.  A fucking reactionary, addle-headed dipshit.  What else would you expect from media village idiot wannabee-in-chief Josh Marhall's website?

Rubio's not happening, no matter how much the establishment media and their pissboys like Marshall and Judis attempt to fluff him up.  Rubio is a slimy creep, and between his family and his finances and his all-round teabagging idiocy, he won't be collecting any wins in any more elections anywhere in his life.  He sucks on tee vee, and he was stupid enough to resign his Senate seat, so he soon will be relegated to an enriching sinecure with the vile conservative establishment.

Bernie Did The Speech Properly

He came out in the winner's spot, channeled his stump speech into what could have been mistaken for a victory speech, and did it well, using the exposure to further his campaign.  And he helped himself by looking good out there, by looking like a winner.  Unlike Clinton.  Or Cruz.  Or Rubio.  Or Trump.  It's too bad Bernie's not gonna get it done, but he is pretty good at this shit.

Hey, Chuck Todd, You Fucking Dope, Bernie Went On Last Because That's When The Winner Speaks

Bernie didn't win, but he knows how to command the optics, kinda like a professional, mainstream politician, and since Hillary handed him the chance, he took it.  That's what you're supposed to do.  Of course, you're supposed to win, but Chuck Todd probably doesn't get that shit, either.

Fox "News" Is Not Covering Bernie's Speech: All You Need To Know About America And The Media

Apparently Sanders did not get it done tonight, but he still scares the shit out of Fox "News" and the Koch-suckers and their ilk.  They can't risk exposing any of their sad and ignorant viewers to Bernie Sanders, not even one time.

Cruz And Clinton, The Two Least-Appealing Politicians In The Fucking Universe

Jesus, Trump's gotta be watching this shit show and thinking he really has a chance against Clinton--he doesn't.  But fuck on a stick, Ted Cruz and Hillary Clinton are both awful, awful speakers, awful candidates, awful people.  Unappealing doesn't even begin to describe it.  Miserable, sickening, loathsome.  But tonight looks good for Hillary regardless, and the race might have ended tonight on the Dems' side as well.  Meanwhile, Cruz is blabbering on like a fucking simpleton and blabbering for waayyy too fucking long, too.  We can hate Trump for so so many things, but the worst sin of Trump's life might turn out to be not working a little bit harder in Iowa so we would not have had to endure Cruz's fatuous insanity tonight and for even one more day. 

As The Male Sarah Palin, Marco Rubio's Risible Third-Place Loser Speech Shows Why He'll Never Be The Nominee

Gods damn, Marco Rubio is a loser, and he lost big tonight, but only in exceptional America can the idiot who came in third with less than a quarter of the vote run out on the tee vee and hop around with a straight face and imbecilic sincerity like he just won the fucking Tour de France spouting some deranged and incoherent word salad.  Loser.  Rubio is the male version of Sarah Palin.

And Fuck You, Mike Huckabee, You Fat Sack Of Greasy Shit

Nobody will miss that nasty cocksucker Huckabee, not even jesus.

The Republicans are so fucked now--Iowa was a tough state for Trump, and he should have had no chance with those christian dipshits.  However, Cruz will not win another contest, and Rubio will not win a single thing, with Jeb! continuing his self-immolation in Iowa.  Tonight says Trump is going to be the nominee, and the establishment Republicans are fucked fucked fucked.

Fuck Off, Martin O'Malley

Nobody likes you.  Get out.

Rubio is done as well, no matter how much Fox and MSNBC try to prop him up--he won't win a single thing this year.  It's bullshit.  Plus, Cruz won't win another thing this year; he's out even if he doesn't know it yet.  If Clinton holds on, it's President Hillary tonight.

Catholic Boat

Green Lobster

Looks like the same super-sparkly green as on the Circle A as well.  Nice.

5 Tickets Out Of Iowa For Republicans? Keep Dreaming, Fuckers!

It would be nice for you idiots to think so, motherfrakkers, but there are either exactly 1 or 2 tickets out of Iowa.  If Trump wins, it's 1, and Trump will effectively run the table for the nomination.  If Trump comes in second, then Jeb! probably gets the chance regardless of where he actually finishes because Rubio is a fucking weeny, Cruz is a hateful, teabagging ogre, Christie is a stinking bloated carcass, and Kasich is a fucking disgusting creep--unfortunately for the world, Jeb! is the only viable choice for the Republican establishment as it finds itself scared shitless of Trump.

Regardless, there are no five fucking tickets out of Iowa.  That bullshit is wishful whistling past the graveyard by the scam artists and two-bit whores like Huckabee and Carson and Santorum and Paul.  At the most it's Trump plus one, and that one is Jeb! by default.  Or it could be Trump plus none, as the nomination suddenly falls to Trump more than nine months before election day.  Gonna be a tough 2016 for the Republican party.

School Nurses, There's A Great Idea To Campaign On For The Dems

A school nurse, a librarian, and a library in every school in America!  If the Dems were serious, every single Democrat in the U.S. would be running on that.  They could emasculate the Republicans with that shit.  "Don't say we can't afford it.  We got F-35's and nuclear powered aircraft carriers and more bombs than we can count, so don't you dare say we don't have the money.  We have money for anything we want.  Explain to these good exceptional American people why you don't WANT every school in America to have a school nurse and a librarian and a library because that's the only reason you would not support it.  Why is that Ms. Teabagger and Mr. Republican?"  IF the Dems were serious about beating Republicans instead of being essentially saner Republicans, this would be fucking golden, but don't expect Dems to get serious about differentiating themselves from the rock-ribbed conservative establishment any time soon.