One Year Ago Today

where was obama during the wisconsin recall?

this piece is one of the many posts, comments and random quips floating lazily around the internets asking the simple question: where the fuck was president obama during the recall elections, and how many votes could he have delivered? 

probably enough to win another seat.  5000 votes woulda done that.  probably enough to turn defeat into victory.  that would have set a great precedent for his all-kinds-of-fucked reelection plans.  probably enough to energize some of the voters across the country who are probably gonna sit the next one out after voting for him last time.  see ever-more-perilous reelection hopes.

so, it really is a case of the wisconsin  recalls being another blinding example of what a wuss obama is and how much he sucks as a democratic president.  don't tell john cole or that stupid and angry african american woman. 

ed schultz might just be the biggest obama fluffer on msnbc

big ed was just on there saying that he believes obama still wants to be walking the picket lines with american working folks right after he showed a clip where obama basically told public sector union workers to go fuck themselves.  angry black lady would be very psyched.  the rest of us are just kinda bummed that big ed is such a fool.

is mitt romney more of a man than al gore?

this question will determine who is president in 2013.  right now mittens is in the position al gore was in during the 2000 campaign.  he's boring, awkward and an utterly inauthentic hypocrite campaigning against a borderline retarded, swaggering texan asshole whom both the establishment media and right-wing racist teabaggers alike just swoon over.  al gore refused to grow a pair and flatten the idiot texan.  if mittens plays it the same way, he's history.  i'm curious to see if he is a better man than gore--which would be pretty easy: joe lieberman!--and as such pummels perry into a smirking, greasy smear on his way to the white house.

one way romney will probably sink perry is with michele bachmann.  she's a full-on fucking lunatic teabagger, but her presidential campaign is over, whether she knows it or not.  if romney uses her as the attack dog, and she chews off perry's balls in public, then he will sink faster than the literacy rate in texas.  with perry out of the way, vice presidential candidate bachmann can reel in those hateful biggot christian teabaggers with her jesus talk and defuse some of the mormon heathen satanist cult feelings in the hearts of those wonderful americans.

if he is successful, he will be the next president of the united states. 

is greg gutfeld dumber than sean hannity?

i know it sounds crazy, but he's obviously dumber than o'reilly.  sean hannity, however, is a pretty fucking low bar, though watching him for a few seconds really makes you wonder.  could he be the dumbest person on fox news channel?  eric bolling is making a play to be a bigger douchenozzle than neil cavuto, though cavuto is much fatter at this point.  still, a more interesting question: is greg gutfeld a bigger zero than sean hannity?

it's perry vs. mittens

marcos daily is dead wrong on this one; it's now down to rick 'the dick' perry and mittens the kitten.  michele 'psycho fag hag' bachmann is toasty.  disgusting stain santorum and serial adulterer gingrich are done and not a single person cares.  herman 'pizza pizza' cain stays in long enough to ensure that perry picks him to be vp; that's his game all along, to have one of those assholes pick him for the number 2.  and i do mean number 2.  if bachmann's generating any more than 2 watts, she starts stabbing perry in the balls at every opportunity so that pussified mittens picks her to be his veep.  if she fails at that, it's back to stretch-mark republican slut jello wrestling against sarah palin at whatever state fairs'll have 'em.  or maybe really boring and disgusting lesbian porn vids with christine o'donnell.  anyway, bachmann is toast unless she can do a man's work and take care of perry.  it's not gonna get her the nomination, but it will get her the second chair, because romney's gonna need her to dilute that anti-mormon racist teabagger bullshit as well.  nobody else is gettin' in; no rudy or christy or that other turd from new york.  it's gonna be either perry/cain or romney/bachmann.