Thursday, January 10, 2013

One Year Ago Today

intense uzzi xc

so long ago, the uzzi xc was intense's cross-country trail bike, sort of a weakling older brother of the uzzi sl.  supposedly using the same main triangle as the uzzi sl, the xc was the bike when 3 inches of front and rear travel seemed like a lot, and a marzocchi z-1 was a huge 100mm-travel downhill fork.  at the time, most of the riders who had full-suspension bikes rode either super-v's (good) or proflex's (horrible), so maybe the uzzi xc was a reasonable choice if you had the coin and the better-in-every-way uzzi sl wasn't out yet.





our man in caracas

it's pretty hilarious how we keep making enemies of shitty little countries who pose absolutely no threat to the united states and are not likely to have such an ability in the next 200 or 300 years, so all we can hope is that some beneficent fairy or helpful aliens give iran a bushel basket of nuclear weapons and that the iranians share with our man in caracas so that venezuela will feel safe from invasion and then citgo will continue to help out with affordable heating oil in the united states.  according to joe kennedy, that was the only company who was smart enough to join up with a feel-good program to keep people from freezing to death.  it makes you wonder what else we don't know about those dirty rotten bastards in caracas.

tim tebow vs. ricky williams: your daughter's dream date

i don't know about you, but if my daughter came home with vile idiot jesus freak tim tebow, i would live out my days in ignominy and despair, but if she brought home the thoughtful and amazing ricky williams, i would look forward to a fun-filled senescence overflowing with wicked smart and interesting grandchildren. 

new hampshire funfetti

frankly mr. shankly, new hampshire is never any fun.  it's a gnarled and cheap old-timey-nasty new english dump, vermont's idiot cousin, and the primary tonight probably will not serve up any satisfying, high-fructose entertainment.  romney's romp just might launch him into south carolina and florida wins which means we're pretty much all wrapped up despite what the media buffoons will do and say.  i don't think any of the also-rans will be transformed into serious contenders tonight, and the best we can hope for is an hilarious, obscenely personal anti-mormon onslaught from newt's racist pimp.

things we learned in new hampshire

romney really, really wants ron paul to stay in the republican party and deliver as many of those douchebag paul voters as possible in the general election.  keith olbermann is right: the current tv election coverage sucks donkey dick.  it looks awful, and cenk and granholm are not ready to play on the big stage.  the four dwarves are fucked tonight and going forward; it's all newt and his pimp's blood money from now on.  david shuster looks confused as to why he's playing second banana to the clowns in the studio.  al sharpton.  at least half of msnbc's programming each day should consist solely of tamron hall standing in front of those data screens with her ipad wearing that dress and reading the news.  if maddow keeps her show, sharpton can do the rest of the other half; not sure if he can stand that long, though.  ron paul is creepy.  and he's not a 2012 republican.  watching jon huntsman's second-loser speech, it's pretty obvious why huntsman's father doesn't want to waste money on his son's campaign. 

pennsyltucky stupid

pennsyltucky's favorite son is losing his shit over his governor's hateful and backward food stamps policies.  punishing the helpless is a favorite teabagger asshole tactic, but punishing savings and demanding that people become absolutely desperate before they qualify for helpful and stimulative programs like food stamps is not only stupid and evil but also harms the greater economy while people the bad bad people starve.  every chain grocery store manager and convenience store owner should be lining up to kick the pennsyltucky governor in the nuts over and over until he reconsiders his position as a fucking douchenozzle. 

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